How to Manage Morale When a Well-Liked Employee Leaves

by?Liane Davey

It’s a dreadful moment when a well-liked member of your team tenders their resignation. You experience a cocktail of emotions ranging from fear about how the rest of the team will react, to frustration at having to add recruiting to your already hectic calendar. ?The worst is the lingering feeling of being rejected. As with most difficult situations as a manager, how you handle the resignation will affect more than just you. How you respond will influence whether the person’s departure becomes a typical bump in the road or the inflection point to a downward trend for your team.

收到深受愛戴的團(tuán)隊(duì)伙伴的辭職信真是太可怕了。此時，作為管理者，你一定會百感交集，既對團(tuán)隊(duì)其他成員可能出現(xiàn)的消極反應(yīng)誠惶誠恐，又因?yàn)橐谝呀?jīng)很繁雜的工作日程表上再增加招聘計(jì)劃一事而感到挫敗不已，最糟糕的還有那揮之不去的被拋棄感。像應(yīng)對其他棘手問題一樣，管理者對此事的處理方式影響到的不僅僅是自己。深受愛戴的員工離職，若處理得當(dāng)，那就只是一塊微不足道的小小絆腳石；若處理不當(dāng)，將可能成為導(dǎo)致整個團(tuán)隊(duì)士氣走上下坡路的轉(zhuǎn)折點(diǎn)。

Before sharing the news with anyone, take some time to consider your response carefully. This allows you to grapple with your own reactions before you’re forced to manage those of your team members. If you move too quickly and try to communicate a positive message while harboring anxiety, frustration, or bitterness,?those potent emotions will show through in your body language. When your words are positive but your body language telegraphs concern, your team will notice the incongruence and?infer your intent?from what you’re?showing?rather than what you’re?saying.

先不要急著與任何人分享這則離職消息，而是花點(diǎn)時間充分思考一下你的處理策略。這樣做的好處是，當(dāng)你不得不面對團(tuán)隊(duì)其他成員可能作出的任何消極反應(yīng)時，你自己已經(jīng)基本整理好了自己的情緒。如果你在焦慮、挫敗或是憎恨等負(fù)面情緒左右下倉促行事，那么即使你勉力傳達(dá)一種積極的信息，你的肢體語言還是會不由自主地讓那些強(qiáng)烈的消極情緒一覽無余。當(dāng)積極的言辭配上暗藏?fù)?dān)憂的體語，這種不協(xié)調(diào)一定會被團(tuán)隊(duì)成員察覺到，他們會根據(jù)你的表現(xiàn)而非講話內(nèi)容來揣測你的想法。

Once you’ve reflected on your own reaction, you can work through a process that will minimize the damage of a well-liked team member resigning.

在仔細(xì)斟酌自己的情緒反應(yīng)后，你可以通過一個系統(tǒng)化的流程將此事件所帶來的破壞性控制在最低程度。

重視餞行過程

Start by helping everyone celebrate the person who is leaving.?It’s understandable if you feel like downplaying the person’s departure, in hopes that no one will notice. It just isn’t likely to work. Losing a well-liked colleague will create concern and even grief for your team and invalidating that grief removes an important part of the process. Letting the person slip out the door unheralded will suggest that you don’t care. Don’t make the mistake of minimizing the moment.

首先幫助大家一道歡送離職者。你可能會希望輕描淡寫地處理員工離職事件，以期淡化其消極影響——這是可以理解的，但這樣做不大可能管用。失去一個深受愛戴的伙伴勢必會給團(tuán)隊(duì)帶來憂慮甚至傷感。在這個過程中，傷感是人之常情，視而不見意味著硬生生地取消了一個關(guān)鍵環(huán)節(jié)。淡化離職過程、讓離職者悄然離去只會透露出你對團(tuán)隊(duì)成員的漠不關(guān)心，所以千萬不要犯這樣的錯誤。

Instead, be at the front of the “we’ll miss you” parade. Throw a party to wish the person well. Say a few words about some of the great things the person contributed to the team. Laugh about inside jokes and shared experiences because, as you do, you’ll not only make the person who’s leaving feel good about your team, you’ll strengthen the bond among the people who remain.

相反，你應(yīng)該積極加入餞行的行列，站在前排，對離職者說：“我們會想念你的”；你應(yīng)該策劃一個歡送會，向離職者表達(dá)美好祝福，用積極的言辭肯定他對團(tuán)隊(duì)做過的貢獻(xiàn)；你應(yīng)該重溫一些內(nèi)部笑話及共同經(jīng)歷，并為此開懷大笑。這樣做，不僅會讓離職者對團(tuán)隊(duì)感覺良好，也會增強(qiáng)團(tuán)隊(duì)其他成員之間的凝聚力。

Recalling these stories will also put a smile on your face, which is much better than the look of terror that might be associated with your inner voice that’s saying, “What will we do without her?” or “What if others start to follow suit?” That face will only make your team more nervous when they’re looking to you for reassurance. Your words and body language should convey that it’s normal and natural for people to move on.

回憶這些往事也將讓你展露笑顏，這要遠(yuǎn)勝于一臉恐慌。你的一臉恐慌可能會讓人覺得你心里在想“沒有了他我們可怎么辦？”或是“萬一其他人也跟著離職怎么辦？”而這只會讓團(tuán)隊(duì)氛圍變得更為緊張不安，因?yàn)榇蠹以局竿軓哪氵@兒獲得“定心丸”。離職是件很正常也很自然的事情，你的言辭和體語需要傳達(dá)出這樣的理解與豁達(dá)。

Once you’ve thrown the party the person deserves, ask them for a favor in return — their candor about what you need to learn from their departure. Even if your organization has a formal third-party exit interview process, conduct your own interview. Ask the person to be honest with you as part of the legacy they can leave in making you and the team better in the future. Prepare your questions carefully and get ready to take the lumps.

離職者歡送會結(jié)束后，你可以誠摯邀請離職者順便幫個忙——請他坦率地告訴你，你需要從他的離職案例中得到什么啟示。即使你的公司有正式的第三方離職面談流程，你依然可以以自己的身份去做離職面談。請他直言相諫，留下寶貴的意見和建議，使你和團(tuán)隊(duì)在未來做得更好。認(rèn)真準(zhǔn)備你的提問，進(jìn)入虛心接受批評的狀態(tài)。

發(fā)起深層次溝通

You’ll need to have good questions and follow-up prompts?to get past the pat answers such as “I was offered higher compensation” and “It’s an opportunity I couldn’t refuse.” You need to identify what factors contributed to the person taking the call from the recruiter in the first place. You can make these questions less pointed by asking, “What advice would you give me to prevent another great person like you from taking a call from a recruiter?” “What do I need to know that people aren’t telling me?” “How could I improve the experience of working here?” By making the questions more generic and less personal, the departing employee might feel more inclined to share any uncomfortable truth.

你需要為面談設(shè)計(jì)出高水平的問題并準(zhǔn)備好一些關(guān)鍵提示語，以便進(jìn)入深層次溝通，否則你可能只得到蜻蜓點(diǎn)水式的回答——如“新工作給的報酬更高”和“這是一個我無法拒絕的機(jī)會”。你需要確定最初是哪些因素使得離職者接了招聘人員的電話。你可以委婉地問：“你有什么好的建議幫助我不再讓你這樣的優(yōu)秀伙伴被招聘人員的電話挖走嗎？”“還有哪些事是我需要注意的呢？”“我需要做些什么來改善團(tuán)隊(duì)的工作體驗(yàn)?zāi)兀俊边@些一般化而不太涉及個人的問題也許會讓離職者更愿意分享那些觸及本質(zhì)的逆耳忠言。

You can also seek feedback about things beyond your control, such as, “What other messages does the company need to hear?” “What factors would contribute to a better experience here?” Throughout the discussion, your emphasis should be on asking great questions. Do as little talking as possible and instead, listen carefully and objectively.

你還可以就你無法控制的事情尋求反饋，如，“公司管理層還需聽取哪些意見反饋？”“哪些因素能夠讓團(tuán)隊(duì)成員獲得更好的工作體驗(yàn)？”整個面談過程中，你自己應(yīng)該盡量少發(fā)言，你的重點(diǎn)應(yīng)該是提出一些高水平的問題，然后認(rèn)真、客觀地傾聽。

After the exit interview, your head will be full of powerful, sometimes conflicting thoughts and feelings. Give yourself a night to sleep on it and then start the process of putting your insights into action. First, lean into the uncomfortable conversations. Whether one-on-one or in team meetings, dig into any themes that have merit. Share your hypotheses and ask people to clarify, refine, validate, or challenge how you’re thinking.

離職面談結(jié)束后，你的腦中會充斥著各種強(qiáng)烈而有時又會是相互矛盾的想法和心情。你可以用一個晚上的時間好好消化，第二天再著手將某些富有見地的想法付諸行動。首先你得“硬著頭皮”找團(tuán)隊(duì)成員談心，不管是一對一的交談還是團(tuán)隊(duì)會議，你們要針對任何有價值的主題進(jìn)行深入探討。你可以開誠布公地談?wù)勀愕脑O(shè)想，讓大家對你的思路進(jìn)行梳理、提煉、驗(yàn)證，甚至提出質(zhì)疑。

For example, you could say, “I’m coming to understand that the biggest problem is not the workload, but the lack of focus. What do you think? Is it true, false, or only half the picture?” This process of generating and testing hypotheses will not only help you make the most targeted changes, it will also help you strengthen the connection with your remaining team members.

例如，你可以說，“我漸漸明白了，最大的問題不是工作量，而是把握不住工作重點(diǎn)，你覺得呢？我說對了沒有，或者只說對了一半？”這種形成和檢驗(yàn)設(shè)想的過程不僅僅能幫助你有的放矢地做出改變，也會幫助你增強(qiáng)與團(tuán)隊(duì)其他成員的連接。

了解他們的真實(shí)感受

As you listen to their responses, go beneath the facts and information they’re sharing with you and watch and listen for what they are feeling and what they value. Where does their language become stronger (e.g., “we?always?do this,” or “never?do that”), suggesting that they are frustrated or angry. Where does it become weaker (e.g., “I?guess?we…, or “I?think?sometimes?we might”), hinting that they might feel hesitant or powerless. What is their body language telling you? When you spot an emotional reaction, ask a few more questions to understand what’s beneath their feelings.

在傾聽回答時，你需要深入揣摩他們與你分享的事實(shí)和信息。認(rèn)真觀察傾聽他們的感受，了解他們重視的東西。注意他們語氣的變化，例如“我們總這樣做”或“我們從不那樣做”這樣的強(qiáng)烈措辭往往表明他們很沮喪或很生氣；相反，“我猜我們……”或“我想我們有時或許……”這樣的委婉語氣則暗示他們可能感到猶豫或無能為力。同時還要關(guān)注他們的肢體語言傳達(dá)的信息，當(dāng)你注意到某個情緒反應(yīng)，可以追問一些問題來幫助你了解他們的真實(shí)感受。

Through all of these conversations, try to discern whether one great person resigning was a single point or the start of a pattern. Be open about what you can do differently and advocate for the changes from other stakeholders that will make your team a better one to work on.

試著通過這類對話去辨別這起離職事件僅僅是個孤立事件還是一個惡性循環(huán)的開端。對潛在的整改持開放態(tài)度，并倡導(dǎo)其他利益相關(guān)者也作出一些利于團(tuán)隊(duì)優(yōu)化的積極改變。

The insights you glean from conducting your own exit interview and testing your hypotheses will be valuable, but don’t lose sight of the most important ways that you contribute to the morale of your team — by positioning them to do meaningful work. Double down on the management essentials. Make sure everyone is clear on your expectations, especially on the highest (and lowest) priorities for the team. Have frank conversations to ensure people feel like they have the requisite skills and resources to do their jobs well. And pay more attention to the feedback, coaching, and celebrations that will motivate them and keep them engaged.

在離職面談以及與同事檢測自己設(shè)想的過程中獲得的洞見誠然是極其珍貴的，但要切記提升團(tuán)隊(duì)士氣的最重要方式是讓團(tuán)隊(duì)致力于有意義的工作。在管理重點(diǎn)上加倍投入，確保每個人都明確你的期望，尤其是有關(guān)團(tuán)隊(duì)的最高（及最低）優(yōu)先級事項(xiàng)。坦率的對話能夠讓團(tuán)隊(duì)成員覺得自己擁有必要的技能和資源將工作干好。同時，要更加注重反饋、指導(dǎo)和慶功，這將激勵他們持續(xù)保持積極、敬業(yè)的狀態(tài)。

If there was a problem on your team you were unaware of (or trying to ignore) it might take losing a well-liked employee for you to recognize the severity of the issue. Work through your emotions and then start a virtuous cycle by celebrating the departing employee, seeking their candid feedback in an exit interview, forming and testing hypotheses about how to improve your workplace, and making meaningful changes that make your team feel heard and valued. Losing one team member might end up being a relatively low price to pay if it leads to better morale all around.

如果團(tuán)隊(duì)出現(xiàn)了問題而你一無所知或刻意忽視，你也許要在失去一位深受愛戴的團(tuán)隊(duì)成員時才會意識到問題的嚴(yán)重性。你需要整理好自己的情緒，然后為團(tuán)隊(duì)建設(shè)開啟一個良性循環(huán)。具體而言，你需要?dú)g送離職員工，通過離職面談尋求坦誠的反饋，形成并檢驗(yàn)旨在改善團(tuán)隊(duì)環(huán)境的設(shè)想，然后作出有意義的改變，讓團(tuán)隊(duì)成員感到存在感和價值感。如果能借機(jī)全面提升團(tuán)隊(duì)的精氣神，那么失去一名團(tuán)隊(duì)成員最終只是付出相對較小的代價。

利亞妮·戴維是3COze公司的聯(lián)合創(chuàng)始人，著有《團(tuán)隊(duì)領(lǐng)航：團(tuán)隊(duì)成長、協(xié)作、執(zhí)行》(You First： Inspire Your Team to Grow Up, Get Along, and Get Stuff Done)一書，也是《領(lǐng)導(dǎo)力解決方案：跨越領(lǐng)導(dǎo)力鴻溝之路》(Leadership Solutions： The Pathway to Bridge the Leadership Gap) 的共同作者。