正文翻譯

How lovely can be a long distance relationship?

異地戀能有多美好?

原創(chuàng)翻譯：龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.ltaaa.cn 轉(zhuǎn)載請(qǐng)注明出處

評(píng)論翻譯

Bala Senthil Kumar, Entrepreneur at Large in Two Countries
If she told me the distance is too hard for her in a long distance relationship does it mean she doesnt love me anymore or is it really the distance?
It means she is calling it off, and doesn't want to be direct, feel bad about it later, or carry the guilt of announcing the break up.
If there are two people in a loving, trusting, caring, sharing relationship, and both care to be in it, if any one has a problem, I would love to think the words will express something along the lines of, "Baby, I hate being so far away from you. I am missing you awfully. Come see me, please!", and both would rush to be in each other's arms. That's love.
If it is a constipated, "This is really hard for me, you know?", it is really saying, "This is inconvenient, and I'd rather let this go and open the door to new possibilities. But you're in the way, and I don't have the courage to call it off, because I know karma is a bitch.
It appears not all of us recognize when a relationship has run its course, distance or no distance. Doesn't mean you can't retrieve, but it takes two who want to run into each other's arms no matter what else. Not two who want to be polite or ask others for advice based on mere symptoms and third party analysis.
Distance makes the heart grow fonder. If love is strong and true and top priority for both that is. But then that kind of love isn't for everyone either.

如果她告訴我，在遠(yuǎn)距離戀愛(ài)中，距離對(duì)她來(lái)說(shuō)太難了，這是意味著她不再愛(ài)我了，還是真的是因?yàn)楫惖貞俚脑颍?br>這意味著她要取消約會(huì)，不想直截了當(dāng)，不想事后為此感到難過(guò)，也不想因?yàn)樾挤质侄械絻?nèi)疚。
如果兩個(gè)人在一段充滿愛(ài)、信任、關(guān)心、分享的關(guān)系中，而且雙方都想?yún)⑴c其中，如果有任何人有問(wèn)題，我希望這些話能表達(dá)這樣的意思:“寶貝，我討厭離你這么遠(yuǎn)。我非常想念你。請(qǐng)過(guò)來(lái)看我吧!”于是兩人都奔向?qū)Ψ降膽驯А@是愛(ài)。
如果它是一個(gè)呆滯的狀態(tài)，“這對(duì)我來(lái)說(shuō)真的很難，你知道嗎?”它實(shí)際上是在說(shuō)，“這太不方便了，我寧愿讓它過(guò)去，打開(kāi)新的可能性的大門。”但你擋了我的路，我沒(méi)有勇氣放棄，因?yàn)槲抑酪蚬麍?bào)應(yīng)很糟糕。
似乎并不是所有人都認(rèn)識(shí)到一段關(guān)系已經(jīng)走到了盡頭，不管是不是異地戀。這并不意味著你無(wú)法挽回，但這需要兩個(gè)無(wú)論發(fā)生什么都想投入到對(duì)方懷里的人。不是兩個(gè)僅僅基于癥狀和第三方分析而想要禮貌的尋求他人建議的人。
距離使兩顆心靠得更近。如果愛(ài)是強(qiáng)烈的，真實(shí)的，對(duì)雙方來(lái)說(shuō)都是最重要的。但這種愛(ài)也不適合所有人。

Farah Safira, studied Psychology at Universitas Indonesia (2019)

Farah Safira，在印度尼西亞大學(xué)學(xué)習(xí)心理學(xué)(2019)

What’s unhealthy:
The unsubstantiated suspicion on your partner
Draw conclusions without at least trying to find out in advance about the actual situation or your partner’s point of view
Not trusting your partner. That they love you, therefore, they wouldn’t do things that would upset you. OR saying you trust them in their face but doesn’t mean it?
Listening to anyone commenting and judging on your relationship instead of having faith on you, your partner, and the relationship
Expect your partner to sacrifice things for you and the relationship meanwhile you refuse to sacrifice yourselves for them and the relationship
More judging than listening
Not respecting your partner’s needs for self-care thus forcing and pushing them to fulfill the needs of the relationship first if not every single time
The long-distance relationship itself isn’t unhealthy. What makes it become unhealthy is how wrongfully you treat yourself, your partner, and both of you within the relationship.

什么是不健康的：
對(duì)你伴侶未經(jīng)證實(shí)的懷疑
在不嘗試事先了解實(shí)際情況或伴侶觀點(diǎn)的情況下得出結(jié)論
不信任你的伴侶。因?yàn)樗麄儛?ài)你，所以他們不會(huì)做讓你難過(guò)的事?；蛘咴谒麄兠媲罢f(shuō)你信任他們，但不是真心的。
傾聽(tīng)他人對(duì)你們關(guān)系的評(píng)論和評(píng)判，而不是對(duì)你、你的伴侶和你們的關(guān)系有信心。
期待你的伴侶為你和這段關(guān)系犧牲一些東西，同時(shí)你拒絕為他們和這段關(guān)系犧牲自己。
判斷多于傾聽(tīng)。
不尊重伴侶對(duì)自我照顧的需求，從而迫使和推動(dòng)他們首先滿足關(guān)系的需求，如果不是每次都是這樣的話。
異地戀本身并不是不健康的。讓它變得不健康的是你在關(guān)系中對(duì)自己、伴侶以及雙方的不當(dāng)對(duì)待。

Amer Khwaja, Introvert. Traveler. Photo Artist. Webmaster. Lived awhile.
I’m in a long distance relationship with a guy who lives in America and I live in Japan. He goes to school to be a doctor and he’s been really busy with school and work and he doesn’t have time to talk to me. What can we do to make things work out?
if you really want things to work out, one of you will have to make a big sacrifice and move to be closer to the other one. Otherwise, how long do you plan to continue this? How soon before one of you meets someone who lives a lot closer and decides its better to be with someone they see all the time than someone they rarely see?

我住在日本，和一個(gè)住在美國(guó)的男人發(fā)生異地戀。他上學(xué)是為了當(dāng)醫(yī)生，他一直忙于學(xué)習(xí)和工作，沒(méi)有時(shí)間和我說(shuō)話。我們能做些什么來(lái)解決問(wèn)題？
如果你真的想讓事情順利進(jìn)行，你們中的一方將不得不做出巨大的犧牲，并向另一方靠近。否則，你打算持續(xù)多久？要多久你們中的一個(gè)人會(huì)遇到一個(gè)住得很近的人，并認(rèn)為和一個(gè)經(jīng)常見(jiàn)面的人在一起比和一個(gè)很少見(jiàn)面的人在一起更好?

Rinku Gala, 13 years of experience in Marketing Communications

Rinku Gala, 13年的營(yíng)銷傳播經(jīng)驗(yàn)

I am in one since more than a yr. It's tough but not impossible. LDR works if Love is strong on both ends. Also what do you'll want most in relationship. If it's physically it will definitely break, if you'll working on building a future together then it may work as long as you'll are commited to one an other & share the same goal. If you can't manage please give up earlier the better to save your & his/her time and efforts.

我已經(jīng)在一年多的時(shí)間里處于異地戀了，這很艱難，但并非不可能。如果愛(ài)的兩端都很強(qiáng)烈，異地戀就會(huì)有結(jié)果。另外，在你們的關(guān)系中，你最想要什么。如果是身體上的接觸，它肯定會(huì)破裂，如果你們一起努力建設(shè)一個(gè)未來(lái)，那么它可能會(huì)有結(jié)果—只要你們相互承諾，共享同一個(gè)目標(biāo)。如果你做不到，請(qǐng)盡早放棄，以節(jié)省你和他/她的時(shí)間和精力。

Victoria August, CEO at Kenner Promotions & Publications
I think that the distance between two people sometimes gives more time to relax, to be themselves, and get to know each other with time between visits to digest what they learn and begin to feel for each other; Without the great expectations to quickly make a decision to commit. When they travel to see each other they know their time is limited so they cherish what they have together as a special treat.?

我認(rèn)為，兩個(gè)人之間的距離有時(shí)會(huì)給他們更多的時(shí)間去放松，做自己，在兩次探訪之間花時(shí)間去了解對(duì)方，消化他們了解到的東西，并開(kāi)始感受對(duì)方；不用快速做出承諾決定和抱有巨大期望。當(dāng)他們旅行去看對(duì)方時(shí)，他們知道自己的時(shí)間有限，所以他們珍惜在一起時(shí)的特殊待遇。

Prity Roy, B.A from University of Calcutta

普里蒂·羅伊，加爾各答大學(xué)學(xué)士

Every relationship needs effort , time , communication and love ofcourse . If you both love eachother distance does not matter. I am in a LDR and trust me we are just like normal couples . We miss eachother but we can't meet .we want to hug eachother but we can't .
When I informed my friends about him they said that this relationship won't work but still it's working. He is caring and loving . Physically we are not together but emotionally we are together . He is mature and I am immature .
I am sick he is there for me . He is the first person after my mom asking about my health . He motivates me for everything's . He scold me .Yeah I wait for his phone calls mostly . He is my bestfriend I can share anything with him. He fights with me but end up hugging me . He never ask me about my male friends . My exam he is ready to sacrifice his sleep . He stay busy but never forget to ping me asking about my study .?

當(dāng)然，每段關(guān)系都需要努力、花時(shí)間、溝通和愛(ài)。如果你們相愛(ài)，距離并不重要。我就在異地戀，相信我，我們就像普通夫妻一樣。我們彼此思念，卻無(wú)法相見(jiàn)。我們想擁抱對(duì)方，但我們不能。
當(dāng)我把他的事告訴我的朋友們時(shí)，他們說(shuō)這段關(guān)系沒(méi)有結(jié)果，但仍然有效，他充滿關(guān)懷和愛(ài)心。身體上我們沒(méi)有在一起，但情感上我們?cè)谝黄?。他成熟而我不成熟?br>我病了，他在我身邊。他是繼我媽媽之后第一個(gè)問(wèn)我健康問(wèn)題的人。他激勵(lì)我做任何事。他罵我。是的，我大部分時(shí)間都在等他的電話。他是我最好的朋友，我可以和他分享任何東西。他和我打架，但最后還是擁抱了我。他從不問(wèn)我關(guān)于男性朋友的事。我的考試他犧牲睡眠給我做準(zhǔn)備。他總是很忙，但從不忘記打電話給我詢問(wèn)我的學(xué)習(xí)情況。

Ann Patrick, B.Sc. Psychology, 22 Years Training in Buddhism + (1949-present)
A long-distance relationship can be a bright spot in our day .. especially if we don’t have much of a life or are not interested in much. It can also give us a dream of a better-future to hang onto. LDRS can be positive during a pandemic lock-down, when we CANNOT get out and live a full life, and when we have NO idea what tomorrow will hold.
But for normal living conditions, they are not very advisable.
First of all, they are not actual relationships. Since 90% of what we grasp about and share between us and another comes NOT from the VERBAL content, but from the NON-VERBAL cues .. you can only relate 10% to someone you are not with in-person. LDR’s DO create a sense of “pseudo-understanding” that can be very appealing, that we WANT to believe in .. but it is not about reality.
So most of long-distance ‘relationships’ are little more than a shared fantasy. We don’t even know for SURE if the person’s situation is what they claim it is .. let along having the opportunity to learn WHO they are BY observing them in person, as they relate to others, make decisions, and react to annoyances.

異地戀可能是我們生活中的亮點(diǎn)。特別是當(dāng)我們對(duì)生活不感興趣或者對(duì)生活不感興趣的時(shí)候。它也能給我們一個(gè)更美好未來(lái)的夢(mèng)想。在大流行封鎖期間，當(dāng)我們無(wú)法出去過(guò)充實(shí)的生活，當(dāng)我們不知道明天會(huì)發(fā)生什么時(shí)，異地戀的人可以是給與信息的。
但在正常的生活條件下，它們是不可取的。
首先，它們不是真正的關(guān)系。因?yàn)槲覀兯莆蘸头窒淼?0%都不是來(lái)自語(yǔ)言內(nèi)容，而是來(lái)自非語(yǔ)言線索。你和沒(méi)有和你在一起的人只能有10%的關(guān)系。異地戀確實(shí)創(chuàng)造了一種“偽理解”的感覺(jué)，這種感覺(jué)非常有吸引力，我們想要相信，但這與現(xiàn)實(shí)無(wú)關(guān)。
因此，大多數(shù)遠(yuǎn)距離“關(guān)系”只不過(guò)是一種共同的幻想。我們甚至不確定此人的情況是否與他們聲稱的一樣。讓我們有機(jī)會(huì)親自觀察他們，當(dāng)他們與他人相處，做出決定，對(duì)煩惱做出反應(yīng)時(shí)來(lái)了解他們是誰(shuí)。

The drawbacks of an LDR are:
The more attached we become to the fantasy, the more we hate our REAL life and the more unhappy we become.
Since there is only 10% communication, most of what we think is going on is our own wishful thinking superimposed over reality.
Misunderstandings are difficult to fix, since there are none of the non-verbal cues to create a sense of reassurance.
And if we DO get together with them, our fantasy about them will carry us along for a while .. but as that starts to disintegrate, MOST LDR’S become very difficult and painful and end badly. Because the fantasy we have become so attached to cannot live up to the reality of who the other person actually IS.
Finally, many men are motivated to seek a relationship for the physical contact. They cannot get that from an LDR, and sooner or later some lady WHERE they live catches their eye and they drop the LDR.

異地戀的缺點(diǎn)是：
我們?cè)绞前V迷于幻想，就越討厭現(xiàn)實(shí)生活，也就越不快樂(lè)。
由于只有10%的交流，我們認(rèn)為正在發(fā)生的大部分是我們自己疊加在現(xiàn)實(shí)之上的一廂情愿的想法。
誤解很難消除，因?yàn)闆](méi)有任何非語(yǔ)言的線索來(lái)產(chǎn)生一種安慰的感覺(jué)。
如果我們真的和他們?cè)谝黄?，我們?duì)他們的幻想會(huì)帶我們走一段時(shí)間。但隨著這一點(diǎn)開(kāi)始瓦解，大多數(shù)異地戀變得非常困難和痛苦，結(jié)局很糟糕。因?yàn)槲覀冞^(guò)于依賴的幻想無(wú)法與另一個(gè)人的真實(shí)身份相匹配。
最后，許多男人尋求一段關(guān)系的動(dòng)機(jī)是身體接觸。他們無(wú)法從異地戀中獲得這一點(diǎn)，遲早，居住在他們附近的某位女士會(huì)引起他們的注意，并放棄異地戀。

Venessa Lobo, Master of Pharmacy BITS Pilani, Hyderabad Campus, Birla Institute of Technology and Science, Pilani (2021)
Why is the long-distance relationship too difficult to handle?
Cause you can’t see that person physically in front you. You start missing the presence of that person.
Things like the way that person made you smile, sometimes cry, when you got really pissed, if you visit a place the two of you frequented you become nostalgic.
And it becomes even more difficult when you aren't going through the best of times and the person you rely on isn't next to you.
They are difficult to be in but not impossible ! All you need is a faithful and loving heart :)
That's why long distance relationships are hard.

為什么異地戀太難處理？
因?yàn)槟憧床坏侥忝媲暗哪莻€(gè)人。你開(kāi)始想念那個(gè)人。
比如那個(gè)人讓你微笑，有時(shí)讓你哭泣，當(dāng)你真的生氣時(shí)，如果你去一個(gè)你們經(jīng)常去的地方，你會(huì)變得懷舊。
當(dāng)你沒(méi)有度過(guò)最好的時(shí)光，而你所依賴的人又不在你身邊時(shí)，這會(huì)變得更加困難。
他們很難有結(jié)果，但并非不可能！你所需要的只是一顆忠誠(chéng)而充滿愛(ài)的心。
這就是為什么異地戀很難。