1722: 先知與損失

?

威尼斯，達(dá)里奧宮

1722年10月15日

女士

我對(duì)我接下來的不克制感到遺憾，但這封信是我在倉促中滿懷怒火寫成的，甚至現(xiàn)在我的袖子上還沾著滑溜溜的粘液。您允許我從您的圖書館借走那本杰出的著作《墨水史》(the History of Inks)，我曾經(jīng)，并且現(xiàn)在也仍對(duì)此表示感激，但是，女士，您行為顯得您并不專業(yè)。

女士， 這樣說吧。我為自己準(zhǔn)備了一個(gè)神圣領(lǐng)域來混合第五種墨水。同時(shí)對(duì)我所在的地方設(shè)置了某些保護(hù)措施。我不想被強(qiáng)盜或我的對(duì)手打擾。我的杰出成就和高貴的地位深受那些無足輕重的修習(xí)者的嫉妒。女士，您必須知道，我是Wit（魂質(zhì)之一）和無形之術(shù)技藝(skill)的專家，因此這些保護(hù)措施的范圍和強(qiáng)度都足夠強(qiáng)大。我借助它們防范著蠕蟲、風(fēng)暴、咬傷、視域、八大準(zhǔn)則和那四百個(gè)名字。(Worm and Storm and Bite and Sight and the Eight Principles and the Four Hundred Names.)

但是，女士，我并未特意花費(fèi)精力防范那些最瑣碎最弱小的存在。畢竟當(dāng)一個(gè)人租下一座宮殿時(shí)，他顯然會(huì)帶著自己的衛(wèi)兵和隨從來防御不速之客，但他不會(huì)想到布置貓和狗來防范老鼠。女士，這是理所當(dāng)然的事。所以，女士，我以為作為一位稱職的知識(shí)保管者，您會(huì)設(shè)置一個(gè)行之有效的保護(hù)措施來保護(hù)我們免受原生先知這種害蟲的侵害!!

...

女士，我已經(jīng)花了必要的時(shí)間讓自己鎮(zhèn)定下來，我將簡(jiǎn)單地講講剩下的事。原生先知被《墨水史》所吸引過來，但我不知道。 當(dāng)我轉(zhuǎn)身補(bǔ)充鈣石時(shí)，它落在了書上，當(dāng)我轉(zhuǎn)回身子時(shí)，書已經(jīng)幾乎被吞沒了。 我用我手臂的力量——強(qiáng)大的力量——與原生先知進(jìn)行了激烈的斗爭(zhēng)。但是原生先知是靈活而粗俗的生物，我最終只得到了粘液、臟污和侵害性的攻擊，這對(duì)我的尊嚴(yán)造成了不小的損害。

因此，女士，我現(xiàn)在堅(jiān)持并要求——

首先，您放棄對(duì)“墨水史”的所有主張。 這本書已經(jīng)不見了，我不想探究它現(xiàn)在具體在哪里，但我可以想象是遺失在原生先知的所作所為中。

第二，為您的不稱職補(bǔ)償我。我想一份未刪節(jié)的《德霍里斯》(De Horis)的第二卷就足夠了。

第三，也補(bǔ)償我清洗衣物的費(fèi)用,我會(huì)附上完整賬單。

謹(jǐn)致您的榮幸，

波辛德的霍科巴爾德。（HOKOBALD, of POCSIND）

[信上的注釋寫道：罰款者被派去對(duì)付霍科巴爾德大師。如果未收到付款，請(qǐng)向忘卻會(huì)(?Society Obliviate )尋求全額賠償]

原文

1722: Prophet and Loss

PALAZZO DARIO,?

VENICE 15th October, 1722

MADAM

I regret the Intemperacy of what must follow but I write in Haste and Full Wroth. Even now my Sleeves are beset with Slither-Slime. You permitted me to bear away from your Library that Noble Book 'the History of Inks', for which I averred and still aver my Gratitude, but, Madam, you have behaved in a Manner Inconsonate with Professional Care.

I regret the Intemperacy of what must follow but I write in Haste and Full Wroth. Even now my Sleeves are beset with Slither-Slime. You permitted me to bear away from your Library that Noble Book 'the History of Inks', for which I averred and still aver my Gratitude, but, Madam, you have behaved in a Manner Inconsonate with Professional Care.

But, Madam, I warded not against the Pettiest and the Meanest. When one takes a Lease upon a Palace, one expects to bring one' s own GuardLosss and Retainers to defend against Uninvited Ill-Wishers, but one does not expect to deploy Ratting-Cats and Mousing-Terriers for defence against the Rodentry. That, Madam, is a Given. So, Madam, I had assumed that as a Competent Preserver of Knowledge you would?PLACE A WARD SALUTIFEROUS TO PROTECT AGAINST SUCH VERMIN AS RAW-PROPHETS!!

...

Madam, I have taken the necessary Time to compose Myself, and I will tell the Rest but briefly. The Raw-Prophet was drawn to the 'History of Inks', by what I know not. E'en as I turned to fill the Calcin, it fell upon the Book and by the Time I had turned back the Book was all but Engulfed. I strove mightily against the Raw-Prophet with the Strength - the great Strength - of my Arms but Raw-Prophets are Flexile and Indelicate Creatures and I won only Slime and Besmirchment and Intimate Assault, at no small Cost to my Dignity.

Therefore Madam I do now insist and demand that

FIRST, you abandon all Claims upon the 'HIstory of Inks'. The Book is Gone, I do not wish to enquire exactly Where, but I imagine within the Doings of the Raw-Prophet.

SECOND, that you compensate me for your Incompetence. A Gift of the Second Volume of the?Unexpurgated?'De Horis' will I suppose suffice.

THIRDLY that you compensate me also for the Cleansing of my Garments. I attach the Bill in Full.

Yours in honour,?

HOKOBALD, of POCSIND.

?[A note on the letter reads: Fine-Takers dispatched against Master Hokobald. In case of?Non-Payment, seek Full Compensatory Redress from Society Obliviate]