宮水瀧的英語(yǔ)小課堂開(kāi)課啦?。ǚ劢z群里歡樂(lè)多）
本文適用于哪些人，不知道，但初中生起可以試著進(jìn)來(lái)看看？大學(xué)生以下建議拿著電子/紙質(zhì)詞典。
事情差不多是這樣的：
讀者群里有位高一生好讀者@屑正庭（網(wǎng)名）前幾天英語(yǔ)課收到了一份作業(yè)：用英語(yǔ)寫(xiě)一份給老師的信，主題是對(duì)英語(yǔ)課的評(píng)價(jià)。
這位同學(xué)寫(xiě)完之后把它發(fā)讀者群去了，作者君我呢，又格外樂(lè)于助人（好為人師），所以就發(fā)揮了自己的優(yōu)勢(shì)學(xué)科的能力，稍微潤(rùn)色了那么億點(diǎn)點(diǎn)……（雖然作者君的英語(yǔ)在自己的所有科目里是經(jīng)常勇奪倒數(shù)第二第三的）
哦，當(dāng)然，原作者同意了的。
也算是讀者群里的日常了吧，今天想起來(lái)就發(fā)一發(fā)吧？對(duì)廣大初高中讀者同學(xué)們應(yīng)該都是有一點(diǎn)用的吧？
正片開(kāi)始：
英文信的收信人之后不是冒號(hào)，是逗號(hào)（Dear Miss Wang, ...)。當(dāng)然中國(guó)格式不一樣的話我理解。
I?"sincerely"?（引號(hào)代表拼寫(xiě)錯(cuò)誤）feel?pleasure疊了，Pleasure作為名詞也不應(yīng)在feel后面跟著（正常來(lái)講后面接的是形容詞，形容你的心情），可以改成（顯然這次不行，這些建議是給以后的你的）It?is?my?pleasure?to...
English?class前面可以加個(gè)our
盡量不要在一句開(kāi)頭用Because，As或者Since都好些
younger?generation我不知道你從哪里來(lái)的，中式英語(yǔ)嗎？但是不要用，new?generation都要好些
feel是在"Think,?feel,?do"里面的feel，相對(duì)的，它指的是感性的感受；你這里會(huì)用think更好些
more?creative?and?interesting，可是more是相對(duì)什么的more？英語(yǔ)課相對(duì)其他課更有創(chuàng)造性、更有趣的話，就可以說(shuō)...more?creative?and?interesting?compared?to?other?subjects.?...
What’s?more我真心建議你這輩子都別用了，Additionally,?furthermore,?moreover...各位群友們，這三板斧比What’s?more、Firstly-secondly-thirdly什么的好多了……當(dāng)然結(jié)束這個(gè)論點(diǎn)敘述系列的就可以是Finally或Ultimately。
如：It?is?evident?that Xie?Zhengting’s?letter?to?teacher?features?a?reasonable?approach.?however,?some?grammar,?spelling?and?structure?mistakes?can be noticed,?which?should?be?corrected?to?prevent?future?usage.
To?begin....Additionally...moreover...furthermore...Ultimately...
To?conclude, Xie?Zhengting should focus on improving his basic grammar and spelling by revising this document; several vocabulary extensions will also improve his writing significantly if used correctly.
you?are?strict?with?our?homework,?I?think...這里不好，銜接過(guò)弱；也沒(méi)必要加I，可以上：Additionally,?you?are?especially?strict?with?our?homework,?which?is?a?sign?of?your?responsibility?towards?us?the?students.
one of...句型注意，后面一般要跟the！→One of the signs of responsibility
類(lèi)似Because，不要用But開(kāi)頭！However可以完美地代替它，yet也是增加多樣性的好幫手；despite/whereas, .../even?though......,?......這種句式則可以幫你的文章大換血。當(dāng)然，however開(kāi)頭的話得補(bǔ)逗號(hào)：However,?there?are?also?some?"defects"?that?we?can?work?together?to?improve.（對(duì)，這里improve一個(gè)詞比make?it?better好多了）
與其于直接從觀點(diǎn)轉(zhuǎn)入論點(diǎn)123，不如先加個(gè)For?example/ for instance?進(jìn)行過(guò)渡
這個(gè)語(yǔ)境里，"solving?the?problems"應(yīng)改為"reviewing"
can可以改成may，這樣態(tài)度更低
命令——must、have?to、should、would、may——請(qǐng)求，從強(qiáng)到弱五種常用的情態(tài)動(dòng)詞。
"...guide?us?more?instead?let?us?have..."這句話很明顯有問(wèn)題，你甚至特意把of去掉了？當(dāng)然只重新加個(gè)of也不行，得是instead?of?letting?us?have才不是病句（僅僅不是病句，這種表述不算好）
teaching?ourselves應(yīng)改為self-teaching
Also這個(gè)剛剛講過(guò)了，Additionally/furthermore/moreover三板斧搶分不眨眼
when?study?new?unit...×
when?we?enter/begin?a?new?unit√
這個(gè)是語(yǔ)法小微調(diào)
...we?so?lack?vocabulary?that?we?can’t?speak?louder.?這個(gè)我寫(xiě)出來(lái)你自己都能挑點(diǎn)毛病吧？首先這句話是這個(gè)論點(diǎn)的最后一句話，并沒(méi)有解釋問(wèn)題的深層原因，也沒(méi)有提供改進(jìn)方針；其次，we?so?lack?vocabulary是語(yǔ)病，應(yīng)改為our?lack?of?vocabulary?denies?us?from?speak?out?loud（我說(shuō)實(shí)話沒(méi)讀懂你想表達(dá)什么問(wèn)題，也就沒(méi)法繼續(xù)解釋問(wèn)題的深層原因或者寫(xiě)改進(jìn)方案）
work?together應(yīng)改為?cooperate
不應(yīng)該用problem，而應(yīng)該用issue，這個(gè)詞有隱患的含義在里面；problem更像是擺在明面上的障礙。
solve?the?problem?we?meet×
solve?any?issues?we?encounter√
any起到的作用是不直接說(shuō)這里存在隱患，而是說(shuō)可能存在的隱患（some/any知識(shí)點(diǎn)你們學(xué)過(guò)吧？）
沒(méi)加復(fù)數(shù)不對(duì)，只要不是1，就要加s，包括0
給meet升級(jí)成了encounter
senior不是seinor。順帶一提，我們管高中叫high school，口語(yǔ)也用senior school（與junior/middle相對(duì)），或者用secondary college（中學(xué)）指代。但這是澳洲英語(yǔ)，英式英語(yǔ)的變種，英式美式有叫senior high的我也不會(huì)奇怪。
落款，可以用Look?forward?to...，在這種情況下后面添的是Look?forward?to?see?you?in?class?tomorrow
全篇都存在的問(wèn)題：書(shū)面語(yǔ)一般不要用簡(jiǎn)略形式，什么let’s、you’re、there’re統(tǒng)統(tǒng)不要用，寫(xiě)全；中國(guó)可能以使用縮寫(xiě)為榮，在土澳正式場(chǎng)合書(shū)寫(xiě)用口語(yǔ)“專(zhuān)用”的縮略我會(huì)勸你積極準(zhǔn)備后事。
?
附錄·分析類(lèi)動(dòng)詞列表（讀后感、觀后感、閱讀理解長(zhǎng)答）
十分明顯，極易看清
難以辨認(rèn)，晦澀難懂。
使用范例·主動(dòng)
Xie Zhengting illustrates Miss Wang as a “strict” person who checks his homework regularly through his letter to teacher.
Xie Zhengting encourages/motivates/stimulates/inspires the readers to think that Miss Wang is a “strict” person who checks his homework regularly through his letter to teacher.
使用范例·被動(dòng)
Miss Wang is illustrated by Xie?Zhengting as a “strict” person who checks his homework regularly through his letter to teacher.
The readers are encouraged to think that Miss Wang is a “strict” person who checks Xie?Zhengting’s homework regularly, through his letter to teacher.
附錄二（括號(hào)內(nèi)內(nèi)容用于輔助說(shuō)明題意）
例：本篇作者名字是？（張三、李四、王五）(1分）
實(shí)際答案這三個(gè)都不是。
Who is the author of the article, if specified? (Miss Xie) (1 mark)
You may refer to the context as required, as mosaic is applied.
What is the form of the article? (newspaper articles, poetry, prose...)?(1 mark)
List one tone you found for the article, and explain.?(Desperate, emotional, critical)?(2?marks)
Who are the target audience/s? (Teachers, department of Education, Miss Xie)?(1 mark)
What is the issue of the article? (Whether Miss Xie?should attend the English classes)?(1 mark)
Describe the author's contention/point of view. (Author suggests that?although Miss Xie?might dislike the English classes, she?have to attend them)?(2?marks)
Identify two of?the arguments the author used to support his?contention. (1. English is a compulsory subject in the University Entrance Exam; 2. ...)?(2?marks)
這是土澳閱讀理解常見(jiàn)的題目里面相對(duì)比較基礎(chǔ)以及適用的，啊對(duì)，土澳閱讀理解沒(méi)有選擇題。
不適用的，包括分析文章所附的配圖，以及圖片如何支持作者的觀點(diǎn)的；以及……
大家可以試著做一做上面的題目。
參考答案：(眾所周知，文學(xué)作品千人千面）
Xie Zhengting?
Persuasive letter
Critical/analytical/calm... (choose one tone only)?
Analytical, as the author analyses the strengths and weaknesses of Miss Wang's classes through?minimal amount of emotional dictions/word choices and reasonable arguments.
Miss Wang
Whether or not Miss Wang taught her?English classes well.
Xie suggests?to the audiences that Miss Wang has several advantages and disadvantages when teaching her English classes.
·Miss Wang?hosts a "creative and interesting" English class in author's perspective;?
·Miss Wang?demonstrates a sense of responsibility through be?"strict" with the?author's homework;
·Miss Wang fails to perform a proper walkthrough of the test papers with the English Class;
·A lack of vocabulary commonly exists throughout?the class.
Only 2 of the above answers should be included.
/10
Extention Question: (this is NOT?a perfect response)
(Each?correctly identified persuasive device: 1 mark)
(Each?correctly identified?piece?of quotes: 1 mark)
(Each adequate explanation to the effect: 2 marks)
是的，最后一大題分值大于前面的所有題合起來(lái)。?
作者君大概是澳洲高一生英語(yǔ)第二語(yǔ)言的頂尖水準(zhǔn)，換算至第一語(yǔ)言是中段水平，寫(xiě)的“標(biāo)答”自然也不是那么標(biāo)答，僅有參考意義。
差不多就是這樣啦，我們下一章再見(jiàn)！
