正文翻譯
原創(chuàng)翻譯：龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.ltaaa.com 翻譯：ycb1990 轉(zhuǎn)載請注明出處

My partner and I (her: 35F, me: 39M) have been together for 3 years and have an 18 month old daughter who we both love dearly. Unfortunately we have been in a completely sexless relationship since midway through her pregnancy, almost 2 years now.

我和我的伴侶(她: 35F，我: 39M)已經(jīng)在一起3年了，有一個18個月大的女兒，我們都非常愛她。 不幸的是，自從她懷孕中期以來，我們一直處于一段完全沒有性的關(guān)系中，到現(xiàn)在差不多兩年了。

I’ve tried my best up until this point to be patient and understanding as giving birth, looking after a baby, and breastfeeding can be extremely exhausting. Our daughter is healthy and there weren’t any usual complications.

在此之前，我已經(jīng)盡了最大的努力來保持耐心和理解，比如生孩子、照顧嬰兒和母乳喂養(yǎng)會讓人精疲力盡。我們的女兒很健康，沒有出現(xiàn)任何常見的并發(fā)癥。

I’m totally frustrated and don’t know what to do!

我現(xiàn)在非常沮喪，不知道該怎么辦！

評論翻譯
原創(chuàng)翻譯：龍騰網(wǎng) http://www.ltaaa.com 翻譯：ycb1990 轉(zhuǎn)載請注明出處

Mindtaker?
You do what you want as far ass communication goes, id try one last conversation.

你想怎么做就怎么做吧，我們再進行最后一次交談。

So here is my advice if you don''t get through to her. I hope you do, but if you dont.

所以如果你不能說服她，我就給你一個建議。我希望你說服她，但是如果你不能，那就采取我以下的建議。

As shown to her by you and your wife.

就像你和你妻子給她看的那樣。

So again, keep trying, because you don''t just dump someone, but if she keeps not putting in effort, not being willing to work on fixing things, and not willing to set a better example of a healthy happy relationship to her daugher.

所以，再一次繼續(xù)嘗試，因為你不能隨隨便便就離開某人。但是如果她繼續(xù)不愿意付出努力，不想彌補你們之間的關(guān)系，不愿意為她的女兒樹立一個健康快樂婚姻關(guān)系的好榜樣。

It would be selfish and shitty parenting to stay. You will now have the responsibility to set a better example to her by finding a relationship based on love, respect, kindness and intimacy. That you don''t settle and just stay in a shitty situation because you had unprotected sex and made another human being.

留下來只會繼續(xù)這種自私和糟糕的養(yǎng)育方式。你現(xiàn)在有責(zé)任為她樹立一個更好的榜樣，在愛、尊重、善良和親密的基礎(chǔ)上建立一段關(guān)系。 你不會安定下來，只是呆在一個糟糕的環(huán)境里，因為你做了無保護措施的性愛，并且造就了另一個人。

That you put the kid first, and that you don''t make them pay the tab for your shitty choice in partner.

你把孩子放在第一位，你不會讓他們?yōu)槟阍愀獍閭H選擇買單。

You co parent, you work together, and you rebuild.

你們共同撫養(yǎng)孩子，一起工作，一起重建家庭。

But again, Hope it works out the other way, but no good parent stays together for the kids, only selfish shitty parents do that, because they are cowards.

最后，再一次希望事情會朝著另一個方向發(fā)展，但是沒有一個好的父母會只為了孩子才呆在一起，只有自私的垃圾父母才會這么做，因為他們都是懦夫。

QUABITY___ASSUANCE
Holy fuck that''s a good answer.

我靠，這是個好評論。

maddiegr?
I love this response so much because I was in this exact situation with my parents. The whole time I just thought that it was normal and that’s how parents acted towards each other.?

我非常喜歡這個評論，因為我和我的父母就屬于這種情況。 一直以來，我都認(rèn)為父母之間這樣相處都是正常的。

They weren’t hateful or abusive but they didn’t actually love each other and it wasn’t until my dad actually found someone and got remarried that I realized what a healthy relationship was supposed to look like.

他們沒有仇恨或虐待，他們實際上并不愛對方，直到我父親真正找到了另一伴再婚后，我才意識到一段健康的婚姻關(guān)系應(yīng)該是什么樣的。

Both parents are so much happier and better off now, and by extension so is he. The greatest gift you can give your children is to show them what it looks like to love and be loved in a healthy way. Staying together ''for the kids'' is bullshit.

父母雙方現(xiàn)在生活都更加幸福和美滿了富裕了，我弟弟也是如此。你能給你的孩子最好的禮物就是告訴他們什么是健康的愛和被愛。 為了孩子們才呆在一起簡直就是胡說八道。

Theapeman12496 12496
This is advice I wish I had been given.

這是我希望別人可以給我的建議。

Amyte255
I think this is a good answer. But I also think it is silly to walk away from a relationship when everything else is good. However, his wife could be going through severe depression or something else. Has this avenue or other mental problem been addressed? Has he asked why she isn''t into intimacy? Is she still intimate in other ways? The post doesn''t give any information on to why the wife doesn''t want intimacy, which suggests OP himself doesn''t know. Wouldn''t it be better to try and get to the the crux of the problem before walking away? I know OP suggested couple''s therapy, but why would the wife refuse? Does she not see she has a problem somewhere?

我認(rèn)為這是一個很好的答案。 但我也認(rèn)為，在其他一切都很好的情況下，放棄一段感情是愚蠢的。然而，他的妻子可能正在經(jīng)歷嚴(yán)重的抑郁癥或其他什么。這種選擇或其他心理問題是否得到解決？ 他有沒有問過她為什么不喜歡親熱？ 她還在其他方面有親密關(guān)系嗎？ 這篇文章沒有提供任何關(guān)于妻子為什么不想要親密關(guān)系的信息，這表明博主公自己也不知道。 在離開之前試著找到問題的癥結(jié)不是更好嗎？ 我知道他建議夫妻治療，但是妻子為什么要拒絕呢？ 難道她看不出她有什么問題嗎？

foxy_fluffers?
I second this. Stayed for a while with my ex husband for our son, was miserable every waking moment and our kid felt that misery. When we got divorced, you could feel the tension and anxiety lift from our son''s shoulders (he was 3 when we got divorced) and he is in such a better head space now. I''m in a really great relationship with a man who I see a future with; and my son gets two happy people who take turn loving on him...mom and dad.

我同意。 為了我們的兒子，我和前夫在一起呆了一段時間，每時每刻都很痛苦，我們的孩子也感受到了那種痛苦。 當(dāng)我們離婚的時候，你可以感覺到我們兒子肩膀上的緊張和焦慮消失了(我們離婚的時候他才3歲) ，而且他現(xiàn)在的精神狀態(tài)好多了。 我和一個我看到未來的男人相處的很好; 我兒子得到了兩個都變的快樂的人來輪流愛著他... 媽媽和爸爸。

Never just stay "for the kids" because it sets a precedent that sacrificing one''s happiness is a goal. Happiness is contagious, but so is misery.

永遠(yuǎn)不要說是“為了孩子” ，因為這開了一個先例，以犧牲一個人的幸福為目標(biāo)。 快樂是會傳染的，痛苦也是一樣。

kasierdarkmoon?
You said everything I thought when I was reading OP’s post. Great job! Bravo BRAVO

當(dāng)我在讀 博主的帖子的時候，你說了我所想的一切。干得好! 太棒了

SamaelTheSeducer
astonishingly well said. you’re doing a good service please keep commenting on more post.

說得好得令人吃驚。你做的很好，請繼續(xù)評論更多的帖子。

ProperCut0 5. ProperCut0
Wow, very articulate! What this man/woman said!!

哇，口齒伶俐! 這個男人 / 女人說的話真是絕了! ！