Raider：The beautiful doll grew up while I was locked away

漂亮的洋娃娃在我深陷牢獄之災(zāi)時長成了

It’s stupid to be hurt that she doesn’t remember me, considering the single time I laid eyes on her, I was hidden behind the tinted windows of my car. I’m a big, scary-ass motherfucker, so if we’d met, she’d remember.

因為她對我毫無印象而傷害她是愚蠢的，考慮到我們的第一次見面實際上是我隱藏在我的車窗之后對她單方面的窺視。我是一個面目可憎的龐然大物，如果我們見過面，她一定對我印象深刻

Consider it collected, because whether or not he coughs up the cash he owes me for the last job we did, ain’t no way in hell I’m giving her back. I am a gentleman, though, so I’m giving her two days to make that decision herself. To stay with me.

就當(dāng)他能湊齊這筆錢吧，因為無論他是否會將上次活計欠我的錢吐出來，我都不會將她歸還，不過，我是名紳士，所以我會給她兩天時間自己做出決定：和我在一起

Reassuring words claw the insides of my throat—I wouldn’t harm a single hair on your head—but I swallow them down. She wouldn’t believe me. Her visible terror when I walked into the house confirmed she looks at me and sees a freak, same as everyone else. “For now, anyway, you’re safe. Bring your fucking toy. Let’s go.”

安慰的話語在我喉中呼之欲出——我不會傷害你一根頭發(fā)——但我還是咽了回去。她不會相信我的。當(dāng)我走進房子，她面上顯而易見的恐懼證實她所看到的我是一只怪物，就和其他人看到的一樣。

I amend my earlier statement that I’m some kind of gentleman. I’m the furthest thing from one. I’m a horny, pissed off, criminal bastard, and she’s got the misfortune of tending to my neglected dick tonight.

我更正我先前聲稱自己是名紳士這個說法，我與這類人背道而馳。我是一頭饑渴、易怒、充滿罪惡的野獸，她今晚將不幸地撫慰我難以抒發(fā)的欲望。

“You finished packing or what, doll?” I run my tongue along my bottom lip. “We’ve got a date, you and me. And we’re three years late for it.”

“你收拾好了嗎，寶貝？”我舔了下下唇?！拔覀冇幸粓黾s會，只有你我。這場約會我們已經(jīng)晚了三年。”

Slowly, she lets go of my arm, dropping several inches to the floor. I hold my breath as she comes closer, hands lifted in peace. “We have a date, remember?” Oh. Oh shit. Her fingers glide up my chest, and I can’t—c-can’t believe she’s touching me voluntarily.?

慢慢地，她松開了我的手臂，離地面有幾英寸。當(dāng)她走近時，我屏住呼吸，平靜地舉起雙手?！拔覀冇袀€約會，記得嗎？”哦！哦該死的！她的手指滑過我的胸膛，我不敢——不敢相信她主動觸碰我。

The presence of those tears makes me hunger to sacrifice myself at her feet. Maybe she doesn’t think I’m a freak.?

那些眼淚的存在讓我渴望在她的腳下卑躬屈膝。 也許她不認為我是個怪物。?

My raging lust is cut with bitterness and disappointment. A wounded sound tries to escape from my mouth, but I clamp my teeth down around it until my gums ache. “You think I could forget our date?” I laugh, ignoring how unnatural it sounds.

我肆虐的欲望被痛苦與失望攔腰截斷。聲音中的受傷試圖從我嘴里泄出，但我緊咬牙關(guān)，直到我的牙齦疼痛?！澳阋詾槲視浳覀兊募s會嗎？”我揚起嘴角，忽略這句話聽上去有多不自然。

I won’t be taken advantage of with the doll in my possession. If they see me as weak, they might try to steal her back from me. No. No, I won’t allow that.

洋娃娃在我手上，他們不敢對我輕舉妄動。如果他們認為我流露出一絲脆弱，他們可能會把她從我身邊奪回去。不，不，我不允許。

There’s no help for how I am, how I look. How she sees me. The sooner she gets accustomed to an ugly bastard between her sweet virgin thighs, the better.

我是怎樣的人，我看起來如何，對她如何看待我沒有任何幫助。她越快接受即將被這個丑陋雜種占有的事實，就越好。

Diliah：

I once again glimpse the hurt I thought I imagined earlier，It’s in the slump of his shoulders, the wounded bear expression. He seemed genuinely worried that I might have been hurt. If he plans to off me, would he even care?

我又一次在他臉上瞥見了我之前以為是錯覺的受傷，他肩膀下垂，表情像一只受傷的熊熊。他似乎真的擔(dān)心我可能會受傷，如果他打算謀殺我，他會在乎這一點嗎？

There’s a tiny sliver of flickering street light filtering into the van around the edges of black paint covering the windows. It illuminates the damaged planes of his face, wild green eyes alive with starvation. His pants are tented, his mile-wide chest fighting for breath…

一點街燈閃爍的光芒從覆蓋窗戶的黑漆邊緣滲入貨車之中，照亮他臉上受損的部分，以及饑腸轆轆的綠色眼眸，他蓄勢待發(fā)，寬厚的胸膛上下起伏著隨時準備戰(zhàn)斗···

You tamed the beast, my brother said. Added to the hurt he keeps forgetting to hide from me, I’m starting to wonder if this man is just scaring me…because he doesn’t know any other way.

我的哥哥說，你馴服了野獸。除了他一直試圖忘記向我隱瞞的受傷，我開始懷疑這個男人是否只是在嚇唬我···因為他不知道任何其他的方式與我相處。

What do I have to lose by testing my theory? Nothing.

驗證我的猜想對我有什么損失？毫無損失

Still, he doesn’t breathe or bat an eyelash. Carefully, I trace my touch up to his rough, scarred, unshaven face…and with a gruff, desperate sound, he turns into my touch, inhaling and exhaling rapidly. As I watch in awe, he nuzzles me, malice leaching from his expression in degrees.

一動不動，他屏住呼吸，也沒有眨眼。我小心翼翼地撫摸著他粗糙、傷痕累累、胡子拉碴的臉龐···伴隨著一聲粗啞、忍無可忍的嘶吼，他回應(yīng)了我的觸碰，快速地喘息著。當(dāng)我充滿敬畏地看向他，他用鼻子蹭著我，他的面上緩緩浮現(xiàn)出怨念。

Raider：

Late at night in my cell, I used to imagine the doll touching me like this. Every time, I battled to keep it pure. Battled to keep her imaginary hands on my face, or even my shoulders. Prison weakened my good intentions, though, as it does every man, and eventually I gave up the fight.

午夜夢回，我身在囚獄之時常?；孟胙笸尥捱@樣的觸碰，，每一次，我都試圖保持純粹，努力想象她的手落在我的眉間心上，然而，監(jiān)獄削弱了我堅韌的意志，就像每個人一樣，最終我放棄了抗?fàn)帯?/p>

But the more her fingers skate over my skin, the war inside me stills. I’m under the spell she’s weaving around me. I’m lost to the sensations of her touch, the perfection of having her close. Isn’t she still scared of me? It makes me insane to think she’s afraid when all I want to do is protect her, but no one has ever been this brave around me before. What if it’s all a trick?

但隨著她的手指在我皮膚上起舞的地方越來越多，我內(nèi)心的波瀾就停止了，我被她在我周身編織的符咒迷住了。我迷失在她的觸碰之中，迷失在她位于我身邊的完美之中。她不是還對我心存畏懼嗎？而我想做的只是保護她而已，一想到她害怕我這件事就讓我發(fā)了瘋，但以前在我身邊從未有人如此勇敢過。如果這一切都只不過是一場騙局呢？

Please don’t let it be a trick.（請不要讓這一切成為一場騙局）

Can fucking her with this freakishly large body of mine be anything but abuse? Fueled by need and hunger—calling her my due—I’ve disregarded those worries until now, but they’re flooding back, carried by the gentleness she’s showing me. One touch and she’s robbing me of a lifetime of hostility and hate.（憤世嫉俗）

用我這畸形的身體占有她算不算一種虐待？在需求與渴望的驅(qū)使下——我稱她為我的應(yīng)許之物——我一直忽視這些憂慮直到現(xiàn)在，它們又一次涌上心頭，裹挾著她帶給我的溫柔。只是一下觸碰，她就剝奪了我此生的憤世嫉俗。

?“I couldn’t risk bringing you to a motel or somewhere respectable, because anyone with a fucking brain would look at you, then look at me, and know you didn’t come along willingly.”

?“我不能冒險將你帶到汽車旅館或者其他體面的場所，因為任何有腦子的人看到你，再看看我，都會明白你不是自愿的。”

“Easy for you to say. You’re sweet and beautiful. Something out of a dream.” I lean in, getting right in her face. “I come crawling out of people’s nightmares.”

“你說得容易，你甜美又漂亮，所有人的夢中情人。”我俯身過去與她對視?！岸襾碜运腥说膲趑|。”

She kisses me.

One minute, my mind is a sky full of rioting thunderheads, and the next, it’s clear and blue and goes on for miles. The softness of her lips pressed to mine, her small hand cupping my scarred cheek…they might kill me, the sensations are so phenomenal. I can hear her heart pounding, matching mine, and for a sliver of time, we’re not so different. I’m not a giant, hulking beast about to traumatize an innocent. I’m just a man kissing his girl.?

她吻了我。

上一刻，我的腦海里還是烏云密布電閃雷鳴，下一刻就撥開云霧見天日，她柔軟的嘴唇貼在我的上面，她的小手捧著我傷痕累累的臉頰···這真是要了我的命，這種感覺如此驚人。我能聽到她心如擂鼓，就和我的一樣。有一段時間，我們并無分別。我不再是一只傷害無辜的巨大野獸，只是一個親吻自己女伴的男人。

I’m braced on my forearms alongside her wiggling body, even though I want to pin her down, imprison her. But that would mean hurting the doll and no one—no one, not even me—hurts the doll. I can’t believe I even considered it. At this point, if she’s tricking me into thinking us being together isn’t a sickening sin, I’m going along for the ride

我的前臂扶著她不安分的身體，盡管我想制服她，囚禁她，但這對我的洋娃娃而言意味著傷害，沒有人——沒有人，甚至包括我——可以傷害洋娃娃。我不敢相信我居然有這種想法。在這一點上，如果她欺騙我，讓我認為我們的結(jié)合不過是一份令人作嘔的罪惡，我會樂意付諸于現(xiàn)實。

I’m marking her. Claiming her. Figures I would accomplish it the same way an animal does. She tastes like spun sugar and I’m never going to get enough.

我在標(biāo)記她，宣示我的主權(quán)。我想我會如同動物一樣完成這件事，她嘗起來就像糖一樣，而我始終無法滿足。

Her sigh of relief is a soothing balm raining down all over my ruined soul. She’s relieved to be around me. Not scared or disappointed. There’s still an undeniable part of me that’s still waiting for the other shoe to drop. Waiting for her to laugh and say her sweetness has all been a lie.

她如釋重負的嘆息是一種撫慰的香露，傾灑在我滿目瘡痍的靈魂上。她在我身邊全然放松。沒有恐懼也沒有失望。不可否認的是我仍在提心吊膽，等待著最終的審判。等待著她笑著告訴我她的甜言蜜語不過是謊言。

We stare at one another for heavy, hungry moments. Moments I swear I’m losing my tether on reality, my focus narrowing down to nothing except this girl. This chance fate is giving me to be her provider, lover. Her man.

我們凝視著彼此，等待沉重與饑餓的時刻。我發(fā)誓我正在失去對現(xiàn)實的掌控，我的注意力集中在這個女孩身上，再無暇顧及其他。命運給予我這個機會成為她的供養(yǎng)者，愛人。她的男人。

Delilah：Call it Stockholm syndrome, call it whatever you darn well please

稱之為斯德哥爾摩綜合征吧，隨便你怎么稱呼

Raider：

My muscles are tight to bursting, possessiveness raging so loud in my chest it would deafen the world if played over a radio.

我渾身緊張到爆炸，占有欲在我的胸口肆虐，如果可以通過收音機播放，它回蕩在世界上的聲音震耳欲聾。

This beauty just nabbed herself one gorgeous beast.

這位美女剛剛狩獵了一只美麗的野獸。