本章概述：

????????????亞歷桑德拉修女卡住了。

????????????In which Sister Alessandra gets stuck.

正文：

我不確定為什么要告訴她這個(gè)。

我的名字……我為什么要告訴她我的名字？到底是什么讓我告訴一個(gè)靈族女巫——隨便她說(shuō)自己能做或做不了什么——我的名字？

一想象她可能用我親口說(shuō)出的名字從我那取走什么，我的心就涼了半截。她說(shuō)自己不是女巫，可是靈族跟亞空間緊密相連，正是這一點(diǎn)導(dǎo)致了他們最終的隕落。

我傻愣著蹣跚走出門去浴室，試圖不去想我的嚴(yán)重失誤，隨后停下來(lái)，感激這間浴室無(wú)比慷慨的贈(zèng)予。

一個(gè)圓形的大浴池，寬到足以讓半打人舒適地被容納其中。一個(gè)化妝臺(tái)和一個(gè)寬三格的梳妝臺(tái)，甚至還有一個(gè)壁龕，里面有一個(gè)切除了腦葉的機(jī)仆等待著接受布置茶點(diǎn)的命令，盡管還有沒(méi)有剩下的茶點(diǎn)是另一個(gè)問(wèn)題。

我會(huì)滿足于一次簡(jiǎn)單的沐浴，

交互面板很簡(jiǎn)單，我按下了幾個(gè)激活符文，過(guò)了一會(huì)兒浴池中就充滿了芬芳撲鼻的沐浴水，水面上已經(jīng)冒出了肥皂泡。

熱水看上去相當(dāng)令人愉悅，我隨后回想起了早前的愿望：再次清潔。我發(fā)出一聲苦笑，抽出了戰(zhàn)斗刀并盯著刀刃，那里還留有一絲極淡的鮮紅色。

“再次清潔？”我惱怒地嘟噥著。“我在這等失敗后還會(huì)再度清白么？”

我驅(qū)散這些想法，走到其中一個(gè)更衣壁龕，脫下我的武器并放在一邊，然后摸上我的護(hù)頸鎖以釋放我的動(dòng)力甲的加壓密封。

至少我試圖這么做了。

護(hù)頸鎖卡住了，無(wú)論我如何扭轉(zhuǎn)封口我的套裝都松不開。

“真是應(yīng)景，”我弱弱地笑了起來(lái)，最后不再拉那個(gè)東西?！拔液貌蝗菀卓煲磦€(gè)好澡，卻甚至沒(méi)法從我的護(hù)甲里出來(lái)。”

我不想哭出來(lái)。

我是一名戰(zhàn)斗修女，國(guó)教神圣的武裝修會(huì)的一員，祂的圣命的執(zhí)行者。我無(wú)畏地手執(zhí)刀劍和爆彈槍介入與綠皮侵略者的交戰(zhàn)，不知疲倦地戰(zhàn)斗，宰了一個(gè)獸人老大，所以我肯定不會(huì)因?yàn)楸豢ㄔ谧o(hù)甲里卻又超想洗澡而哭出來(lái)。

“伊……”我開始叫她的名字，想把她喊過(guò)來(lái)，但哽在了第一個(gè)音節(jié)上。

難以置信，我不是想向一個(gè)靈族女巫呼救，我絕對(duì)拒絕允許自己墮落得那么深。單是我欠她一條命就夠屈辱……欠她不止一次則實(shí)在不可理喻，可事實(shí)如此。

我抓住護(hù)頸，繼續(xù)與之較勁，向帝皇祈禱它會(huì)自己松開，可其中一個(gè)鎖一定是被卡住了，因?yàn)樗茏龅淖詈玫木褪前l(fā)出一陣難聽的摩擦音。

“草，”我吐出一句下巢臟話，放棄并舉著我的一只能用的胳膊?；蛟S如果我兩只手都能動(dòng)的話我可以硬把密封松開，可我現(xiàn)在無(wú)能為力。

另一雙手會(huì)有所幫助，我的大腦提供了一個(gè)叛逆的想法，而我盡職地推開了它。

取而代之的是，我只是怨念地盯著更衣壁龕內(nèi)，試圖想出如何穿著全套盔甲離開浴室又不在伊莎萊眼里顯得更受辱。

難怪她不認(rèn)為我是個(gè)威脅，我被困在了自己的護(hù)甲里，甚至沒(méi)法給自己洗澡……我都不大會(huì)把自己當(dāng)作威脅。

毫無(wú)預(yù)兆地，一陣隱痛襲上我的后背，緊接著的是金屬的扭動(dòng)聲，同時(shí)一只蒼白的手劃過(guò)抓住了我的護(hù)頸猛扭了一下。這制造了一聲奇怪的爆響，然后我感到后背上有一陣束縛，伴有金屬的抗議，隨著密封終于屈服并松脫，又是一聲解脫的嘆息般的嘶聲。

我用力吞了口唾沫，轉(zhuǎn)頭看到正后退著的伊莎萊，她的嘴唇勾起一個(gè)細(xì)微的笑容，一只手抓著一片結(jié)實(shí)，粗糙的獸人金屬，我覺(jué)得那就是卡住密封解脫機(jī)制的元兇。

“我似乎聽到你開始叫我了，但我不確定，”伊莎萊簡(jiǎn)潔地說(shuō)，把那片金屬?gòu)椀揭贿??！拔抑安恢滥惚豢ㄗ×??！?/p>

我恨她如此美麗，美到我的呼吸凝滯在喉嚨里，

她火紅的及腰長(zhǎng)發(fā)已經(jīng)不是我在廣場(chǎng)上初見她時(shí)那樣梳成辮子披在身后。現(xiàn)在它自由地傾瀉而下，在日出的色澤下勾勒出她柔韌的身軀。她的眼睛也再一次打動(dòng)了我，絲毫不比之前輕。

紫藤開放時(shí)的顏色。

“我……”撒謊說(shuō)我沒(méi)有卡住毫無(wú)意義，但這還是令我惱火?！澳銥槭裁匆恢睅椭?？”我轉(zhuǎn)而問(wèn)到。

她的表情變成了一種興致缺缺的放松姿態(tài)，隨后她又一次聳肩；那奇怪的，人類的表達(dá)方式以她拉長(zhǎng)的身體比例來(lái)看很怪異，讓她的整個(gè)身體似乎都在此起彼伏。

?“因?yàn)槲覜](méi)別的事可做，”她再次把手伸向我并回答道。

當(dāng)她的手放到我的肩甲上時(shí)停了下來(lái)，這也是有意為之，我意識(shí)到她在沉默地征求同意。

她，一個(gè)異形女巫，一個(gè)可能見過(guò)諸多世界的興亡的靈族，在征求同意，出于某種原因這讓我倍感難以置信，以至于我呆楞了一會(huì)兒。

為什么，是我腦中唯一的想法。為什么要她這么做？為什么她是這樣的？為什么她與修道院的女教長(zhǎng)交給我關(guān)于靈族的一切都如此不同？

我震驚到?jīng)]有躲開她這次的觸碰，她視之為許可，開始小心地脫下我的護(hù)甲。她的手快而高效地解下每一片，輕松地如同已經(jīng)這么做過(guò)很多次了，對(duì)此我頗感好奇。

為什么這個(gè)生物如此關(guān)注于幫助我？這個(gè)問(wèn)題在我的心里燃燒起來(lái)，同時(shí)我發(fā)現(xiàn)自己稍微屈服了一點(diǎn)，悶悶地享受著我的護(hù)甲的重量被細(xì)致而精準(zhǔn)地移除。以及最重要的是，為什么我讓她這么做？

如果她只是在對(duì)我撒謊并佐證我的老師們的話，這幾乎本會(huì)是個(gè)安慰。如果發(fā)現(xiàn)這一切都是為了某個(gè)未知的結(jié)果而進(jìn)行的宏大的操縱，那我可能已經(jīng)松了口氣。

所以我為何如此確信事情并非如此？

伊莎萊把我脫至緊身服，只剩下卡住的左手。

“做好準(zhǔn)備，Cre’yth，”她輕聲道，“我得要拉得狠點(diǎn)?！?/p>

我安靜地點(diǎn)點(diǎn)頭，咬緊牙關(guān)，抓住連著我的腰和壁龕內(nèi)部的吊桿。伊莎萊抓住我的胳膊，用手指在手套和卡住的金屬之間撥弄，站起身來(lái)猛地一拉。

我在手臂上淤青，受虐的血肉被經(jīng)過(guò)的金屬擊中時(shí)發(fā)出一聲悶哼，但左臂這幾天來(lái)突然能再次活動(dòng)讓我倍感解脫。它目前仍然極為僵硬，我繃著臉試圖轉(zhuǎn)動(dòng)它時(shí)只得到了遲鈍的反應(yīng)。

“小心，Cre’yth，”伊莎萊用雙手輕柔地托過(guò)我的手臂，用手指一路沿著摸過(guò)去。“你的肌肉被撕裂了，此外肘部和腕部有扭傷，在這條手臂恢復(fù)前盡量不要?jiǎng)铀??！?/p>

“你為什么關(guān)心？”我問(wèn)到，轉(zhuǎn)身面對(duì)壁龕里的她，我已經(jīng)厭倦了被再次震驚到。現(xiàn)在我只想知道：“你救了我，因?yàn)槟阏f(shuō)我在你的藝術(shù)中看到了美，可你現(xiàn)在本可以離我而去……不是么？”

伊莎萊若有所思地看了我一會(huì)兒，隨后點(diǎn)點(diǎn)頭?！拔冶究梢裕阏f(shuō)的對(duì)，但我也可以說(shuō)我目前住在這，所以我為什么要這么做？”

“你本可以讓我一個(gè)人待著，”我強(qiáng)調(diào)，“但你沒(méi)這么做……為什么？”

“因?yàn)槲蚁朐谒狼皣L試些新事物，”她回答道?！岸鴰椭恪@就是新的，而且我發(fā)現(xiàn)自己不討厭這樣?！?/p>

“你會(huì)原諒我這么說(shuō)：這個(gè)理由看起來(lái)對(duì)你們種族做的任何事都太簡(jiǎn)單了，”我反駁道。

“事實(shí)不需要被相信，Cre’yth，”伊莎萊帶著另一個(gè)微笑說(shuō)，她又抬手撥開我臉上的一簇打結(jié)的頭發(fā)，令我瑟縮了一下?！安贿^(guò)你大體上沒(méi)錯(cuò)，我已經(jīng)不再需要我們種族的陰謀詭計(jì)，以及事實(shí)上，我現(xiàn)在可能比你還覺(jué)得這么做令人厭倦，現(xiàn)在……轉(zhuǎn)身?！?/p>

她抓住我的肩膀把我翻了個(gè)面，她的手指找到了把我的緊身服系在身后的卡扣，并熟練地解開了它們。

“行了，”伊莎萊拍拍我的肩膀告訴我她完事了，然后向后退去，“現(xiàn)在我求求你，Cre’yth，看在你的帝皇或者隨便哪些你膜拜的圣人的份上，沐浴吧。你聞起來(lái)糟糕透頂?！?/p>

我笑了。

這聲音毫無(wú)預(yù)兆地從我嘴里逸出，而當(dāng)我意識(shí)到發(fā)生了什么時(shí)我?guī)缀跻伦约旱纳囝^。

我笑了。

她讓我笑出來(lái)了。

我抓住了緊身服，轉(zhuǎn)身看向她，感覺(jué)胃中有種冰冷的重量，但她只是漫不經(jīng)心地走向浴缸。伊莎萊肯定聽到我笑了……她都聽到了我隔著一個(gè)房間或更遠(yuǎn)時(shí)輕聲念出的，她自己名字的第一個(gè)音節(jié)，所以她不可能沒(méi)聽到我笑，但她沒(méi)有做出反應(yīng)。她彎腰在熱水里攪動(dòng)著手指，我能看到他她嗅著那股香氣，并為之稍稍皺起鼻子。

我不得不承認(rèn)這個(gè)地方之前的主人用于沐浴的香油對(duì)我的品味來(lái)說(shuō)太強(qiáng)烈了。我下一次沐浴的時(shí)候找到了關(guān)掉香油自動(dòng)涂抹器的方法。

我緩緩地剝下緊身服，皺眉于這種感覺(jué)。我短暫地祈禱這這住處里能有某類自動(dòng)洗衣設(shè)備，畢竟我不想在它被洗干凈前再穿上它一次。脫掉緊身服后我明白了伊莎萊對(duì)我的手臂說(shuō)得有多正確。

從我的手到緊挨著肩關(guān)節(jié)下方，我的手臂幾乎完全是一片黑，紫，黃的瘀傷。整條肢體都彌漫著一種入膚及髓的鈍痛。

不過(guò)，新鮮空氣在皮膚上的感覺(jué)令人愉快，我輕嘆著踢開緊身服，拿來(lái)一張毛巾，在前往浴池前包裹住自己。

伊莎萊離開了，我對(duì)自己沒(méi)聽到她離開又皺起眉頭。又一次，我推斷著，我也沒(méi)聽見她進(jìn)來(lái)。靈族被認(rèn)為是超自然地安靜，所以我覺(jué)得并不是所有的教學(xué)都是錯(cuò)的。

我把一只腳浸到水里，開心地舒了口氣，然后脫下了毛巾，完全滑入宜人的熱水中，發(fā)出一聲完全是滿意的嘆息。我看著水被污垢染黑，然后皺著臉想自己是否該先把污物都洗掉再重新放一個(gè)浴池的水來(lái)切實(shí)地清洗干凈，不過(guò)我的心里所想被地板下低沉的隆隆聲打斷，水隨后開始循環(huán)。

很快，水又干凈了起來(lái)，我笑著明白了自己可以在浴池里想呆多久呆多久。

“我們的帝國(guó)被分開了幾百個(gè)世紀(jì)，Cre’yth，”伊莎萊的聲音嚇到了我，我環(huán)抱著自己，幾乎跳起來(lái)，轉(zhuǎn)身看到她在我身邊滑進(jìn)水里，“但熱水浴卻是我們共有的享受，真是奇怪?！?/p>

我用力咽著唾沫，試圖不去看她的裸身，轉(zhuǎn)過(guò)頭把眼睛死死地聚焦在前方。

嗯，我已經(jīng)很放松了。

?

原文：

I’m not sure why I told her that.

My name… why did I tell her my name? What on Holy Terra possessed me to tell an Eldar witch, whatever she professes to be able to do or not do, my?name?

Cold gripped my heart as I imagined what she might be able to get from me with my name, given freely from my own lips. She claimed to be no sorceress, but the Eldar, to a one, truck deeply with the Warp, and it is that which led them to their ultimate downfall.

I stumbled dumbly through the door to the washroom trying not to think of my egregious error, and paused to appreciate the more than generous appointments it had.

A large bath, circular, and wide enough to fit half a dozen comfortably. A station to apply cosmetics and a wide three paned vanity. There was even an alcove where a lobotomised servitor waited to take orders for refreshments, although whether or not there were any left to be had was a different question.

I would be satisfied with a simple bath.

The interface was simple, I pressed a few of the activation runes and a moment later the bath was filling with sweetly scented bathwater, and suds were already bubbling to the surface.

The hot water looked utterly delightful, and I recalled my earlier wish: to be clean again. I let out a weak, bitter laugh as I drew out the combat knife and stared at the blade. The edge of it still bore the faintest stain of crimson.

“Clean again?” I muttered angrily. “Will I ever be clean again after this failure?”

I pushed those thoughts away and walked over to one of the dressing alcoves, shed my weapons and set them aside, and engaged the latch at my gorget to release the pressurised seals of my power armor.

Or at least, I attempted to.

The gorget latch was jammed, and no matter how I twisted at it the seals of my suit would not release.

“How appropriate,” I laughed weakly as finally stopped pulling at the thing. “I’m finally in front of a fine bath, and I can’t even get out of my armor.”

I was?not?going to cry.

I was a Sister of Battle, a member of the holy Ordo Militant of the Ecclesiarchy, and an enforcer of His divine ministry. I strode fearlessly into battle against the green invader with blade and bolter in hand, fought without rest, slew an Ork Nob, and I was most certainly?not going to cry because I was stuck in my armor despite very badly wanting a bath.

“Is…” I started to say her name, to call out for her, but choked on the first syllable.

This was unthinkable, I was not going to cry out for the help of an Eldar witch, I absolutely refused to allow myself to fall that far. That I owed her my life was degrading enough… that I owed it to her more than once was unconscionable, but there it was.

I took a grip on the gorget latch and struggled with it further, praying to the Emperor that it would just give out, but something must have gotten jammed in one of the seals because at best it only made an ugly grinding noise.

“Frak,” I spat the underhive invective as I gave up and hung my one good arm. Perhaps if I’d had both I could have forced the seal loose, but I was hamstrung.

Another pair of hands would be helpful, my brain supplied the traitorous thought, which I dutifully pushed away.

Instead, I just stared into the inside of the changing alcove miserably as I tried to work out how to leave the bathroom, still fully armored, and not be even further humiliated in Isarae’s eyes.

Small wonder she doesn’t consider me a threat. I’m stuck in my own armor and can’t even bathe myself… I would hardly consider myself a threat either.

Without warning, a dull pain thumped into the small of my back, followed by the sound of metal wrenching as a pale hand swept around at the same time to grip my gorget and give it a hard twist. It made an odd popping sound and I felt a strained pressure at my back as metal protested, then there came a hiss like a sigh of relief as the seals finally gave out and clattered loose.

I swallowed hard, then turned my head to regard Isarae who was stepping back from me, her lips twitching up in a small smile, and one hand gripping a piece of sturdy, crude Orkish metal that I presume was the culprit of my jammed seal release mechanism.

“I thought I heard you start to call for me, but I wasn’t sure,” Isarae said simply, flicking the metal fragment aside. “I did not realise you were stuck.”

I hated that she was beautiful, so much so that my breath was tight in my throat.

Her hair, fiery red and long enough to reach her waist, was no longer in the tight corded braid that fell down her back when I first saw her in the plaza. Now it flowed freely, framing her lithe form in the myriad colors of sunrise. Her eyes, too, struck me again no softer than before.

Eyes the color of Wisteria blooms.

“I…” It was rather pointless to lie and claim I was not stuck, but still, it was galling. “Why do you keep helping me?” I asked instead.

Her face fell to a relaxed posture of disinterest, and she shrugged again; that strange, human expression that looked odd with her stretched proportions, which made her whole body seem to ripple with the movement.

“Because I have nothing else to do,” she replied before reaching out to me again.

Her hands paused as they came to rest on my pauldrons, purposefully too, and I realised she was silently asking permission. She, a xeno witch, an Eldar who may have seen the rise and fall of whole worlds, was?asking permission, and for some reason that struck me so utterly unbelievable that I was stunned for a moment.

Why, was the only thought in my mind.?Why was she doing this? Why was she like this? Why was she so unlike anything the rectoresses of the convent had taught us about the Eldar race?

I was so stunned that I didn’t recoil at her touch this time, and she took it as silent assent to begin carefully removing my armor. Her hands were quick and efficient as she detached each piece with the ease of someone who had done it many times before, which I found curious.

Why was this creature so concerned with helping me??The question burned in my mind as I felt myself give in a little and sullenly enjoy having the weight of my armor delicately and precisely removed.?And why, most importantly, am I letting her?

It would have almost been a comfort if she would just lie to me, and confirm to words of my teachers. Were to discover this all had been some great manipulation towards unknowable ends, I think I might have sighed in relief.

So why did I think with such certainty that this was not the case?

Isarae stripped me to my bodyglove, save for the jammed left arm-piece.

“Brace yourself,?Cre’yth,” She said quietly, “I am going to have to pull hard.”

I nodded silently, grit my teeth, and took a hold on the hanging rail that lined the interior of the alcove at my waist. Isarae seized my arm, worked her fingers between the glove and the jammed metal, planted her feet, and yanked.

A strangled cry escaped my lips as the bruised and abused flesh of my arm was beaten by the passing metal, but it was countered by the immense relief of suddenly being able to move my left arm again for the first time in days. It was horribly stiff all the same, and I grimaced as I tried turning it this way and that only for it to respond sluggishly.

“Careful,?Cre’yth,” Isarae took my left arm gently in her hands and rang her fingers down the length of my arm. “Your muscles are torn, and you have sprains in your elbow and wrist, try not to move this arm so much until it heals.”

“Why do you care?” I asked, turning to face her in the alcove and far too tired to bother with being surprised anymore. Now I just wanted to know. “You saved me because you say I saw beauty in your art, but you could leave me now… yes?”

Isarae regarded me thoughtfully for a few moments, then nodded. “I could, you are correct, but I would argue that I live here for now, so why would I?”

“You could leave me alone,” I pressed, “but you don’t… why?”

“Because I wish to try something new before I die,” she replied. “And helping you… that is new, and I find I do not dislike it.”

“You’ll forgive me for saying that seems like far too simple of a reason for your kind to be doing anything,” I countered.

“Truth does not require belief,?Cre’yth,” Isarae said with another small smile, and she brought a hand up to flick a strand of matted hair from my face, making me flinch. “But you are not wrong in the general sense, I am simply finished with the machinations of my kind, and in truth, I probably find them even more tiresome now than you do, now… turn.”

She took me by the shoulders and turned me about, and her fingers found the small clasps and bonds that kept my bodyglove sealed at the back, and deftly undid them.

“There,” Isarae patted my shoulder to tell me she was finished before stepping back, “now please,?Cre’yth, for the love of your Emperor and whatever saints you pray to, bathe. You smell atrocious.”

I laughed.

The sound escaped my lips without warning and I nearly bit down on my tongue as I realised what had happened.

I had?laughed.

She made me laugh.

I turned to look back at her as I clutched my bodyglove in place around me, feeling a cold weight in my stomach as I did, but she just walking towards the bath unconcernedly. Isarae had to have heard me laugh… she’d heard the first quiet syllable of her name I had spoken from a full room or more away, so there was no possibility she didn’t hear me laugh, but she wasn’t reacting.

She reached down and twirled her fingers in the heated water, and I could see her sniffing at the scent, and wrinkling her nose a little at it.

I had to agree that the scented oils whoever had owned this place used for their bathes were leaned on a bit too strongly for my taste. Next time I bathed I resolved to find a way to turn off the automatic applicators for the oils.

Slowly, I peeled the bodyglove off, and grimaced at the feeling of it. I prayed briefly there was some kind of laundering device in this hab because I was not looking forward to donning this again prior to it being washed. With the bodyglove shed I realised how right Isarae had been about my arm,

From my hand to just under the joint of my shoulder, my arm was little more than a mass of black, purple, and yellow bruises. The whole limb throbbed with a dull, pervasive ache that seemed to reach from the skin down to my marrow.

Still, the feeling of fresh air on my skin was a delight, and I sighed quietly as I kicked the glove off, grabbed a towel and wrapped it around myself before venturing out to the bath.

Isarae was gone, I frowned as I realised I hadn’t heard her leave. Then again, I reasoned, I hadn’t heard her enter either. The Eldar were supposed to be supernaturally silent, so I suppose not all of the teachings were faulty.

I dipped a foot in the water, sighed happily, and doffed the towel before slipping fully into the deliciously hot water and letting out a sigh of absolute satisfaction. I watched as the water darkened with grime, and I grimaced as I wondered if I should rinse all of the filth from myself first then run another bath to actually clean up, but my inner musings were silenced by a quiet humming sound from within the floor, and the water began to cycle.

Soon, the water was clear again, and I grinned as I realised I could stay in the bath for as long as I wished.

“Hundreds of centuries divide our empires,?Cre’yth,” Isarae’s voice startled me, and nearly leapt in place as I wrapped my arms around myself and turned to see her slipping into the water beside me, “and yet the luxury of a hot bath is something we share, how curious.”

I swallowed hard as I tried not to stare at her nakedness, and turned my head to keep my eyes fixed firmly ahead of me.

Well, I had been relaxed.