Putting Down the Boulder (for Now)

暫時放下重擔

by Mizenhauer

作者：Mizenhauer

原文鏈接：https://tl.net/forum/starcraft-2/563328-soo-putting-down-the-boulder-for-now

原文發(fā)布于2020年9月18日。soO的兵役于2020年10月22日開始。

翻譯：工團人

“Everything ends badly, otherwise it wouldn’t end.”
—Brian Flanagan

“萬事終將慘淡收場，否則他們都不會終止?！?/p>

——布萊恩·弗拉納根

“There is no real ending. It’s just the place where you stop the story.”
―Frank Herbert

“沒有真正的終點——這只是故事結束的地方?！?/p>

——弗蘭克·赫伯特

It’s the end of an era.

這是一個時代的結束。

soO?has played his final season in?Code S?before starting his military service. Whether or not soO returns in the future, this moment was always going to be more of a gut punch than your average farewell tour. After all, no individual is inextricably linked to?GSL’s flagship competition?than its six time runner up.

輸本打完了他兵役前的最后一屆GSL。無論輸本將要回歸與否，這個瞬間都比一場正常的告別旅程要來得苦澀。但是，沒有人能和輸本一樣，以六次亞軍的戰(zhàn)績與GSL的舞臺有如此多的糾葛。

Maru challenged for that honor when he earned his fourth consecutive Code S title in 2019. INnoVation, likewise, made a claim in 2017 when he won a then-unprecedented?third time. Delve further back and you find pioneers such as Mvp and Nestea, whose triumphs in Korea's most prestigious league secured their status as titans of the game.

Maru在2019年的GSL四連冠時達到了相同的高度。呂布在2017年獲得的，在當時史無前例的第三次GSL冠軍也挑戰(zhàn)了輸本的地位。如果把時間倒回更遠處，你會看到Mvp和雀茶這樣的先驅者們，這些人在韓國頂級聯(lián)賽上的勝利讓他們青史留名。

And, yet, despite all that quartet has accomplished, it's inarguable that after ten years and 38 seasons, no exit leaves a larger wake than soO's.

但是即便有Maru四連冠這般的壯舉，在10年38個賽季的沖刷后，輸本從GSL舞臺上的離去依然激起了層層回響。

soO departs StarCraft II as arguably one of the best five players of all time, and someone who belongs in the?GOAT discussion. Second place in six GSL Code s Tournaments. Runner-up at BlizzCon 2017. Champion at IEM Katowice 2019. But, for all his accomplishments, soO’s significance is far bigger than his tournament resume.

soO以（可能是）星際二歷史上最佳的五名選手之一，和GOAT討論的一員的身份離開了這個游戲。六次GSL S級亞軍。2017年暴雪嘉年華亞軍。2019年IEM卡托維茲冠軍。但是，若悉數(shù)輸本的所有成就，你會發(fā)現(xiàn)他的偉大遠遠不止他站在領獎臺上的履歷那么簡單。

StarCraft II is littered with champions. Some, like Seed or Sniper fade deeper into obscurity with each passing year. Others manage to become fixtures of the scene through continued excellence, but remained largely inaccessible to me for one reason or another. It’s difficult to place myself in Life’s shoes, and attempt to understand what drove him to squander his limitless potential. How am I to sympathize with Rogue, whose transformation into the best player in the world only occurs when the inclination strikes him? INnoVation’s perspective on StarCraft II is the antithesis of the idealized professional who competes tirelessly with an unfailing love of the game. These elements keep them at arm’s length, leaving nothing but their in-game prowess to admire.

那些冠軍星羅棋布地點綴著星際二的歷史。有些冠軍，像Seed（譯者注：2012年GSL S3冠軍）和Sniper（譯者注：2012年GSL S5冠軍）隨著時間的流逝逐漸退出人們的視野；另一些則用他們持續(xù)的出色表現(xiàn)站穩(wěn)了腳跟?？墒?，出于各種各樣的原因，我總是無法完全欣賞和理解他們。我實在搞不懂是什么東西讓Life斷送了自己無量的前程；我也無法對Rogue感到任何同情，他只會在自己想要努力之時登上世界巔峰；INnoVation的星際二職業(yè)生涯，與那種“為自己對游戲的無限熱愛而競技”的理想職業(yè)選手截然相反。這些因素讓我對他們的態(tài)度不即不離，僅僅留下他們游戲中的成就供我瞻仰。

But then there’s soO. The man who failed so many times, but somehow managed to pick himself up and try again and again. The man who matured through suffering and defeat rather than glory and victory.

但輸本是個特例：這個人經(jīng)歷過無數(shù)次失敗，卻每次都艱難地重新站了起來，不懈地沖擊著；這個人通過苦難和失敗的歷練，而不是勝利和榮光走向了屬于他的成熟。

Disappointment is something we’ve all experienced. Failure is something we’ve all encountered. Missed opportunities, wasted chances, these are the currency of life. How we react to pitfalls and setbacks plays an essential role in determining what kind of person we eventually become. soO’s journey may take place on a different plane than ours—what with the hundred thousand dollar cashes and countless hours spent spent playing a video game at the highest possible level—but it runs the same gamut of emotions. How can you not empathize with him? How can his struggle not resonate within you?

我們都曾經(jīng)歷過失望。我們也都遭遇過失敗。那些我們錯過、浪費的機遇都是生活的籌碼。而我們?nèi)绾蚊鎸Υ煺酆褪t很大程度上為我們指出了未來我們的樣子。但是，輸本的人生旅途與我們不盡相同——他花了大筆的錢財和無數(shù)個小時，在游戲中進行著世界最高水準的競技——但他和我們的情緒是相通的。我們有誰能不對輸本的艱難奮斗感同身受？

And, yet, for all its familiarity, soO’s pain is also unlike anything I’ve ever felt. It’s this slightly alien note that makes his tale all the more tragic, enthralling and, ultimately, iconic.

盡管對他的故事無比熟悉，輸本的痛苦也與我所感受過的任何東西不同。是這條稍顯青澀的動態(tài)讓他的故事蒙上了一層悲劇的面紗，讓人無比著迷，卻又感到莫大的諷刺。

“The path to paradise begins in hell.”
―Dante Alighieri

“天堂之路始于地獄?！?/p>

——但丁·阿利吉耶里

soO stands as StarCraft II’s?eighth highest earning player?with more than 600,000 dollars in tournament winnings. The fact that a large portion of this sum came from second place finishes doesn’t make it any less impressive. He’s been a top three Korean Zerg for over half a decade and has flirted with the designation of?best player in the world?on more than one occasion. That fact that someone can exist who is so amazing at what they do, and yet never good enough, is fascinating. It lured me, as I tried to understand the man behind the mythos.

soO以超過60萬美元的累計賽事獎金收入高居星際二歷史上的第八位。這收入中一大部分來自于亞軍獎金的事實也掩蓋不了他耀眼的成就。他在六七年的時間里一直是韓國最強的三蟲族之一,也不止一次與“世界最強選手”的稱號相較量。輸本的存在令人著迷：他的經(jīng)歷如此閃耀，卻永遠不能達到最好。當我嘗試著他傳奇故事背后真正的人格時，他便愈發(fā)吸引著我。

Ever since 2017, when I happened to make his acquaintance, he has been, perhaps, the most forthcoming StarCraft II pro I’ve ever encountered, Korean or otherwise. He's laid bare his feelings about his highest high and lowest lows in countless articles, interviews and videos, entrusting the entire StarCraft community with his vulnerabilities. Whether it’s talking about his time on SK Telecom, his desire to win a championship, or the relief that came when he finally crested the summit, we’ve had plenty of chances to study the evolution of his character.

從2017年我認識他開始,他一直是我見過的最直率的星際二職業(yè)選手，無論在韓國還是世界都是。他會在無數(shù)專欄、訪談和視頻中赤誠地講述他最大的得意和失意,信任星際社區(qū)中每一個傾聽他脆弱過往的人。無論是他談到自己在SKT時，對一個冠軍的渴望，還是他在歷盡千辛萬苦后終于成功登頂時的釋然，我們都可以從中得知他性格的成長經(jīng)歷。

soO wasn’t always the paragon of nobility he is today. He struggled greatly in 2014, as finals defeat after finals defeat weighed upon his mind. Hyper competitive, extremely critical and devoted to StarCraft in a way none outside the pro scene can comprehend, soO waged a war within as much as he battled opponents. His entire life had been spent in anticipation of moments like his showdowns against Dear, Zest, Classic or INnoVation. He’d dreamed of those sorts of matches, of the moment when his love of StarCraft, and the effort he put into it was validated on the grandest stage. Except that dream had rapidly morphed into a nightmare.

輸本并不一直是我們今天所看到的星際選手之典范。2014年，一次又一次決賽的失利縈繞在他的腦海中。這讓他萬分掙扎。對星際二這個游戲極度競爭、極度認真、極度專一的投入是所有職業(yè)圈之外的人所不能理解的，而輸本的內(nèi)心掙扎則與他的星際比賽一樣激烈。縱觀他的一生，他都在期待著自己與Dear, Zest, Classic或INnoVation等頂尖選手的決賽，最終等來的卻是失利。他幻想著這些，能讓他在最高的舞臺上迸發(fā)所有自己對星際的熱愛，和他投入的無限努力的瞬間。只不過，這個夢想迅速化為了他的夢魘。

On and on it went for years and years. 2015 was the year he won?KeSPA Cup, but even that momentary reprieve was quickly marred by a loss to INnoVation in?Cologne. 2016 was a point of desperation, a time when soO finally had enough of the stringent team environment and the criticism of colleagues and fans alike. Who could blame him? soO’s descent into Kongdom wasn’t a private affair. One crushing defeat after another played out before an audience of thousands. Time and again we saw him at his most vulnerable, wounded, ashamed and horrified of what the game he loved had become.

期待與絕望的循環(huán)持續(xù)了一年又一年。2015是他登頂KeSPA杯的那年，但正當他認為自己可以松一口氣之時，IEM科隆中對陣呂布的失利卻迅速打碎了他的幻想。2016年是絕望的一年，這一年里輸本終于受夠了嚴格的隊伍環(huán)境和同事與粉絲的唾罵。但又有誰能怪罪他呢？輸本的日益消沉并不是他一個人的責任。在數(shù)千名觀眾面前的失利一個接一個地發(fā)生。我們一次又一次看到他在自己深愛著的游戲中經(jīng)歷最脆弱、傷痛、恥辱和恐怖的時刻。

Some made jokes, others expressed their sympathy, but could any of us claim to have any idea what went through soO’s mind as he was forced to watch his opponent celebrate amid falling confetti and adulation? Seemingly destined to be the tool of another’s ascension, we can only imagine the despair he must have felt. Despair rooted in the knowledge that, for all the excuses he chose never to make, soO’s fate was entirely his fault.

有些人開他的玩笑，其他人表達對他的同情，但是我們哪一個人能夠說自己懂得輸本在被迫目送著他的對手在彩紙屑和歡呼聲中慶祝勝利時的心情？他似乎注定是為其他人出人頭地而生的工具人，我們也只能想象他經(jīng)歷的種種絕望。他拒絕所有失利的借口，這使他的悲劇命運只能歸咎于他自己；這就是他的絕望所根植的土壤。

None of us would have judged soO had he decided to call it quits. But, for soO, giving up was never an option. Battered, bruised, but never truly vanquished, soO came back in 2017 and, despite falling twice more in the finals of Code S, he asked the crowd with a wavering voice to put their sympathy for him to the side, and give GuMiho his righteous due.

如果輸本決定退役，我們沒人會去評價他?？墒?，輸本的字典中沒有放棄這個詞。他被當頭一棒，渾身淤青，卻從未被徹底打倒；輸本在2017年回歸了，盡管又兩次倒在了GSL決賽的舞臺上，他還是用顫抖著的聲音贏得了觀眾們的同情,卻把自己應得的榮譽讓給了GuMiho。

“It’s the unquenchable thirst for a championship which motivates me. It’s the quest to recapture the joy of the KeSPA Cup which enables me to keep picking myself back up. Only when I become a champion can I retire without regret.”
―Eo Yun Soo

“一種對冠軍無法磨滅的渴望一直激勵著我。我試圖重拾奪冠KeSPA杯時的快樂，這也讓我一次次地重新振作起來。只有在我手握冠軍獎杯時，我才能無悔地退役?！?/p>

——魚允秀

soO may have never won GSL, but it’s not as if he left those six finals empty handed. For all his talent, soO’s most admirable trait isn’t his incredible macro or some other StarCraft bound trait. It’s the courage and maturity that came with defying fate and never yielding. Every time a new season of Code S began, soO knew there was a chance he’d find himself in that same familiar position. But, he never hesitated. He never complained. In soO’s mind, there was only one choice. He began the climb once more. He acknowledged the mistakes of his past. He recognized the potential fate that lay ahead. He vowed to do better and tried as hard as ever. That’s why, though the exact circumstances of soO’s journey are so dissimilar to ours, his plight, when reduced to its most basic elements, is an essential part of the human experience. To fight against our inadequacies. To defy our fears. That is something to which each and everyone one of us can relate.

輸本可能從未捧起過GSL獎杯，但若不是他在六次決賽上空手而歸，他也不會如此落寞。在他所有的才華之中，soO最可敬的優(yōu)點并不是他強大的運營或者其他與星際二相關的才華，而是他敢于向命運說“不”，永不屈服的勇氣和成熟。每次GSL的新賽季開始時，輸本都暗自清楚自己有可能落得亞手的熟悉下場；但是他從未遲疑過；他從未抱怨過；soO的心中只有這一條路可走。他又一次開始攀登；他承認了自己過去的錯誤；他看到了擺在自己面前可能發(fā)生的悲劇命運；他發(fā)誓做到更好并不懈努力著。這就是為什么，盡管輸本人生旅途中的具體境遇與我們迥然相異，他困境的精髓卻是每個人人生中的必經(jīng)之路。戰(zhàn)勝我們的短板，克服我們的恐懼——這是我們在座所有人都能感同身受的。

And, so, soO departs for the military with his reputation as one of StarCraft II’s greatest players firmly secured. His legacy, however, far outstrips trophies, prize money and accolades. That's because he managed something no other player could. He did more than amaze with brilliant in-game play. He did more than entertain with outside-the-game banter. Yes, he was the perfect encapsulation of what it meant to be a competitor, but he was so much more.

就這樣，soO帶著“星際二史上最偉大的選手之一”這個無可爭議的名號走向了兵役。但他的遺產(chǎn)遠不止獎杯、獎金與贊譽而已。這是因為他做了一件任何其他選手都不可能完成的事情。他所做的不止在游戲中的亮眼表現(xiàn)；他所做的不止在游戲外對嘲笑的苦中作樂。是的，他完美地詮釋了什么叫做一個“競爭者”，但又絕對不僅于此。

soO was nothing short of an inspiration, a mighty feat indeed when you consider the tools at his disposal were a mere mouse and keyboard. His seven year StarCraft II journey is the stuff of fairy tales. He faced personal demons, rivals and impossible odds, but eventually persevered, reaching the zenith of the game at IEM Katowice, when his post match interview brought so many of us to tears. In that moment we felt an element of his relief, joy and fulfillment. All the pain, doubt and anguish that allowed soO to grow into the person he is today vanished as he, as we, celebrated his crowning achievement. I cried that day. I know many of you did as well. I'm choking up as I write this very article—as I look back and realize how the unassuming act of watching soO over the course of his career taught me more about the person I want to be than the RTS skills I hoped to emulate.

輸本從來沒缺過勇氣：當你想起他戰(zhàn)斗的唯二武器只有鼠標和鍵盤時，他的偉大功績便顯現(xiàn)了出來。他七年的星際二職業(yè)生涯如童話一般。他對抗著著自己的心魔，眾多宿敵與不可能的逆境，卻最終堅持了下來，在IEM卡托維茲中登上了星際二的巔峰，他的賽后采訪讓我們很多兄弟潸然淚下。那個瞬間，我們得以感受他的釋然、喜悅和滿足。所有讓soO成長為今天模樣的痛苦、懷疑和煎熬在他加冕為王時全部煙消云散。那天我哭了。我知道你們很多人也哭了。我哽咽著寫下了這篇文章——我發(fā)現(xiàn)僅僅是回顧輸本的職業(yè)生涯這件樸實的事，也能夠給我關于我理想中自己應該成為的樣子的啟示，甚于我想要模仿的RTS技巧。

“I learned this, at least, by my experiment; that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.”
―Henry David Thoreau

“我至少從自身經(jīng)歷中領悟了如此道理：若一個人向自己夢想的方向自信地邁進，且努力去以他理想中的方式活著，他將會在尋常的時光中獲得意外的成功?！?/p>

——亨利·大衛(wèi)·梭羅

soO hasn't written off a return to competitive StarCraft II when his military service concludes, which is a rather fitting decision when you think of all he taught us over the course of his career. Eighteen months of mandatory time away from the game? Just another hardship to overcome.

輸本尚未確定他在兵役結束后回歸星際二的職業(yè)賽場，而當我們想到他的職業(yè)生涯帶給我們的啟發(fā)時，就會感到這將會是個正確的決定。18個月和游戲的強制離別？只是即將邁過去的另一個困難罷了。

As we, and as soO say goodbye to this phase of his life, we do so well aware that the state of Korean StarCraft may be very different when and if soO once more takes the stage.

當我們和soO自己向他的這段人生道別時，我們也需要注意到韓國星際的環(huán)境在輸本歸來時可能會有翻天覆地的變化。

But, however different the world will look in 2022, the legacy of Eo Yun Soo remains immutable. Unyielding, unbroken and as committed to his dreams as ever, soO is a living testament to the fact that incredible things can be accomplished if you never give up, if you never stop trying and press on in the face of adversity. None of us can be sure what the future holds, but what I do know is that soO has given me something for which I will forever be grateful.

但是，無論世界在2022年將會是何種模樣，魚允秀給我們的遺產(chǎn)依然不會消失。作為一個不屈不撓的追夢者，soO是“奇跡誕生于永不放棄，永遠嘗試和直面逆境之后”這一事實的鮮活證明。無人能揭開未來的面紗，但我明白，輸本給了我一份能讓我終身感恩的東西。

Credits and acknowledgements
作者署名與感謝

Writers:?Mizenhauer

作者：Mizenhauer

Editor:?Wax

編輯：Wax

Photos: Blizzard, TheOneAboveU

攝影：暴雪，TheOneAboveU

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