Frontline Work When Everyone Is Angry

2020年10月，時(shí)任克利夫蘭診所首席患者體驗(yàn)官的阿德里安娜·布瓦西（Adrienne Boissy）醫(yī)生碰到一個(gè)大問(wèn)題，不只是新冠病毒的問(wèn)題。已經(jīng)被新冠大流行搞得手忙腳亂的醫(yī)護(hù)人員，向她匯報(bào)了患者和來(lái)訪者令人驚恐的不當(dāng)行為：刻薄的評(píng)論、激烈的攻擊性言辭，乃至帶有種族歧視的辱罵。布瓦西告訴我：“從來(lái)沒(méi)出現(xiàn)過(guò)這么糟糕的情況！” In October 2020 Dr. Adrienne?Boissy, then?the chief patient experience officer at Cleveland Clinic, had a big problem, and it wasn’t just Covid-19. Caregivers at the hospital, already stretched thin by the pandemic, were coming to her with alarming reports of abusive behavior from patients and visitors: mean comments, screaming tirades, even racist insults. “It’s never been so bad!” she told me. 20余年來(lái)，我一直在研究工作場(chǎng)所的不文明行為（定義是對(duì)他人粗魯、不尊重或漠不關(guān)心的行為），開(kāi)展調(diào)研了解了世界各地?cái)?shù)十萬(wàn)人的經(jīng)歷。不過(guò)與布瓦西醫(yī)生（現(xiàn)在是Qualtrics首席醫(yī)療官、克利夫蘭診所神經(jīng)科醫(yī)師）聊過(guò)之后，我開(kāi)始思考不文明行為這個(gè)問(wèn)題是否隨著時(shí)間推移越來(lái)越嚴(yán)重，特別是對(duì)一線員工來(lái)說(shuō)，他們親自參與勞動(dòng)、經(jīng)常與顧客和患者直接互動(dòng)。這類員工所在行業(yè)包括醫(yī)療、安保服務(wù)（比如警察）、零售、食品生產(chǎn)與加工、維修、農(nóng)業(yè)、運(yùn)輸（包括航空公司）、酒店和教育等。 I’ve studied incivility — defined as rudeness, disrespect, or insensitive behavior — in workplaces for more than 20 years, polling hundreds of thousands of people worldwide about their experiences. But after that conversation with Dr. Boissy, who is now the chief medical officer at Qualtrics and a neurologist at Cleveland Clinic, I wondered whether incivility is getting worse over time, particularly for frontline workers, who labor in person and often interact directly with customers and patients. These workers’ industries include health care, protective services (think police officers), retail, food production and processing, maintenance, agriculture, transportation (including airlines), hospitality, and education. 我的研究發(fā)現(xiàn)，關(guān)于不文明行為的報(bào)告的確有所增加——這不僅可以從飛機(jī)乘客拒絕戴口罩、咖啡館顧客大罵帶有種族歧視的蔑稱等網(wǎng)絡(luò)熱門視頻中得到證明，前不久我的問(wèn)卷調(diào)查結(jié)果也證明了這一事實(shí)。調(diào)查詢問(wèn)了世界各地兩千多人最近感受到的不文明行為。在這場(chǎng)全球衛(wèi)生危機(jī)中，即使一線工作人員被譽(yù)為不可或缺的英雄，也依然會(huì)成為出氣筒。疲憊不堪、壓力太大且往往失去理智的顧客（有時(shí)是同事）把焦慮和挫敗感發(fā)泄在他們身上。 My research has found that reports of incivility are indeed on the rise — as evidenced not just by viral videos of airline passengers refusing to wear masks or café patrons hurling racial epithets but also by my recent survey that asked more than 2,000 people around the world how they have experienced rudeness lately. Even amid a global health crisis in which frontline workers were heralded as essential and heroic, these employees still became punching bags on whom weary, stressed-out, often irrational customers (and sometimes fellow employees) took out their anxieties and frustrations. 這種不文明行為，不僅對(duì)直接經(jīng)歷它的員工有負(fù)面影響，目睹行為的人也會(huì)受到影響——這些都會(huì)損害企業(yè)與社會(huì)。本文將探討這類后果，并討論領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者如何協(xié)助改善現(xiàn)狀。 This kind of incivility leads to negative outcomes not only for the workers who experience it directly but also those who witness it — all of which harms businesses and society. In this article, we’ll explore those consequences and discuss how leaders can help to improve things. 注意，不文明行為有多種形式，從忽視他人到故意妨害他人，再到嘲笑、戲弄和輕視他人。盡管不文明行為可能會(huì)演變成攻擊性的行為，但本文中所指的不文明行為并非物理攻擊或暴力。 Note that incivility takes many forms, from ignoring people to intentionally undermining them to mocking, teasing, and belittling them. For this article, it does not refer to physical aggression or violence,?although incivility can spiral into aggressive behaviors.

我們身在何處

Where We Are

辨別和研究不文明行為可能很困難，因?yàn)椴涣夹袨槭怯沙惺苷叩母惺軟Q定的。你認(rèn)為某種行為不文明，顧客或許并不這么想。但如果你覺(jué)得自己沒(méi)有得到尊重，無(wú)論對(duì)方是有意還是無(wú)意，你的工作都會(huì)受到影響。另外，對(duì)不文明行為的判斷還會(huì)因文化、世代、性別、行業(yè)和組織而異。 Identifying and studying incivility can be difficult, because bad behavior is often in the eye of the recipient. Behavior you consider uncivil may not be regarded the same way by a customer — but if you feel disrespected, whether your counterpart intended it or not, your work will suffer. In addition, what’s considered uncivil varies by culture, generation, gender, industry, and organization. 不管個(gè)人如何定義不文明行為，人們對(duì)不文明行為的報(bào)告都變得更多了，并且已經(jīng)持續(xù)一段時(shí)間了。2005年接受我問(wèn)卷調(diào)查的員工里，近一半的人表示自己每個(gè)月至少在工作中受到一次粗暴對(duì)待。2011年這個(gè)比例上升到55%，2016年已經(jīng)提升到了62%。 Regardless of how individuals define incivility, they’re reporting more of it — and have been for a while now. In 2005 nearly half of the workers I surveyed across the globe said they were treated rudely at work at least once a month. In 2011 it was up to 55%, and by 2016 it had climbed to 62%. 2022年8月，我設(shè)計(jì)了一項(xiàng)新的問(wèn)卷調(diào)查，進(jìn)一步追蹤不文明行為的發(fā)展趨勢(shì)，并更深入了解當(dāng)今企業(yè)及社會(huì)一線的狀況。這套問(wèn)卷借鑒了之前我與南加州大學(xué)馬歇爾商學(xué)院營(yíng)銷學(xué)教授德博拉·麥金尼斯（Deborah MacInnis）和瓦萊麗·?？怂梗╒alerie Folkes）一同開(kāi)展的以顧客為中心的研究，以及來(lái)自各行各業(yè)面向消費(fèi)者的從業(yè)人員的觀點(diǎn)。 In August of this year, I designed a new survey to further track incivility trends and glean more insight into what’s happening on the front lines of business and society today. It drew on customer-focused studies I previously conducted with marketing professors Deborah MacInnis and Valerie Folkes at USC Marshall School of Business, as well as on insights from people in a range of consumer-facing industries. 在新的問(wèn)卷調(diào)查中，我收集的數(shù)據(jù)來(lái)自世界各地（除南極洲以外所有主要地區(qū)皆有）25個(gè)行業(yè)兩千多個(gè)不同職位的人，包括一線員工和在工作中觀察過(guò)一線員工的人。以下是調(diào)查結(jié)果： In the new survey, the data I collected came from more than 2,000 people in more than 25 industries in various roles across the globe (representing every major region except Antarctica). They included both frontline employees and people who had observed them at work. Here’s what I found: ● 76%的受訪者每月至少遭遇一次不文明行為； ● 78%的人每月在工作中至少目睹一次不文明行為，70%的人每月至少目睹兩到三次； ● 73%的受訪者表示顧客不良行為并不罕見(jiàn)； ● 78%的人認(rèn)為現(xiàn)在顧客對(duì)員工的不良行為比五年前更常見(jiàn)； ● 66%的人認(rèn)為現(xiàn)在顧客對(duì)其他顧客的不良行為比五年前更常見(jiàn)。 ● 76% of respondents experience incivility at least once a month. ● 78% witness incivility at work at least once a month, and 70% witness it at least two to three times a month. ● 73% report that it’s not unusual for customers to behave badly. ● 78% believe that bad behavior from customers toward employees is more common than it was five years ago. ● 66% believe bad behavior from customers toward other customers is more common than it was five years ago. 從我2012年開(kāi)展關(guān)于顧客不文明行為的問(wèn)卷調(diào)查至今，這些數(shù)字一直在大幅度穩(wěn)定增長(zhǎng)。當(dāng)時(shí)61%的參與者表示顧客的不良行為并不罕見(jiàn)，49%的人認(rèn)為顧客對(duì)員工的不良行為比五年前更為普遍，35%的人認(rèn)為顧客對(duì)其他顧客的不良行為也更普遍了。 These numbers have risen steadily and sharply since my 2012 survey about customer incivility. In that survey, 61% of respondents reported that it was not unusual for customers to behave badly, 49% believed that bad behavior from customers toward employees was more common than it was five years before, and 35% believed bad behavior from customers toward other customers was also more common. 今年除問(wèn)卷調(diào)查以外，我還對(duì)員工、經(jīng)理和組織領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者進(jìn)行多次訪談，進(jìn)一步了解他們?nèi)绾卧馐軄?lái)自顧客和患者的不文明行為。 In addition to this year’s survey, I conducted many interviews with employees, managers, and organizational leaders to learn more about how they’re experiencing incivility from customers and patients. 一位兒科急診醫(yī)生說(shuō)：每天我們?yōu)楹⒆犹峁┳o(hù)理時(shí)，都會(huì)遭受家長(zhǎng)的貶低、輕視和大聲喊叫。幾個(gè)月前，我要求一位父親按照醫(yī)院的規(guī)定把口罩戴回去。他沖出病房，說(shuō)他要走了，因?yàn)樗幌嘈糯骺谡钟惺裁从谩Ｎ一氐讲》?，他六歲的孩子告訴我，“爸爸往地上吐了口水”。果然，醫(yī)院地板上有一大團(tuán)口水。 A pediatric emergency medicine physician shared: Daily, families disparage, yell at, and belittle us while we provide care for their children. A few months ago, I asked a father to put his mask back on, per hospital policy. He stormed out of the room and said he was leaving because he did not believe in masks. I came back in and his six-year-old child told me, “Daddy spit on the ground.” Sure enough, there was a big spit wad on the hospital floor. 一位售貨員說(shuō)自己向一位顧客問(wèn)候“早上好”時(shí)得到的回應(yīng)：我不需要你干什么，別煩我。如果有需要，我會(huì)叫你的。你是來(lái)為我服務(wù)的，不是來(lái)跟我說(shuō)話的。 One retail employee related a customer’s response to her saying “Good morning”: I do not need you for anything. Leave me alone. If I need you, I will call you. You are here to serve, not to talk with me. 一位顧客這樣描述她的姐妹在餐廳的不良行為：她把一個(gè)服務(wù)員罵哭了。為什么？因?yàn)榉?wù)員沒(méi)有按照她要求的方式送來(lái)沙拉。 A restaurant patron described her sister’s bad behavior:?She berated a waitress to the point of making her cry. Why? Because the waitress didn’t bring her salad just the way she ordered it. 一位旅行者分享了他們看到同伴對(duì)汽車司機(jī)大叫的經(jīng)歷：他吼道，“你等什么呢？！利落點(diǎn)兒！”他把自己的行李塞給司機(jī)，氣沖沖地出去了。司機(jī)愣在原地過(guò)了一分鐘才跟上去。 A traveler shared their experience of watching a fellow passenger yell at a car service driver:?He yelled, “What are you waiting for?! Get your act together!” He shoved his luggage at the driver and stormed out. The driver stood blinking for a minute before following. 一名前校長(zhǎng)解釋了教育者和工作人員必須時(shí)常保護(hù)好自己，避開(kāi)這種情況：家長(zhǎng)兇狠地走向?qū)W校員工，準(zhǔn)備大干一場(chǎng)。他們不會(huì)好好聽(tīng)你說(shuō)話，而且粗魯、刻薄、有威脅性。 A former school principal explained what educators and staff must often shield themselves from:?Parents approach school staff with claws out, ready for blood. They’re unwilling to listen and are rude, mean, and threatening. 然后是關(guān)于在線不文明行為的報(bào)告，例如某視頻游戲公司的客服團(tuán)隊(duì)收到的電子郵件：一次溝通時(shí)，客戶對(duì)在游戲里的某些體驗(yàn)不滿，發(fā)來(lái)長(zhǎng)篇大論的抱怨，其中包含諸如對(duì)客服代表說(shuō)希望他們的妻子和女兒被強(qiáng)奸之類的內(nèi)容。 Then there are the reports of online behavior, exemplified by the emails received by the customer support team of a video game company:?In one interaction, a customer was upset about some experience they had in the game, and they sent long paragraphs of complaints that included comments such as telling the support representatives that they hope their wives and daughters will be raped. 不消說(shuō)，情況已經(jīng)十分惡劣。一些不文明行為過(guò)于極端，難以糾正，而一些人沒(méi)有動(dòng)力改變或不愿改變。在我的研究中，4%的人說(shuō)自己行為粗魯是因?yàn)檫@樣很有趣，而且不會(huì)遭到處罰。不過(guò)研究表明，許多不文明行為是可以控制的，要做到這一點(diǎn)，我們需要了解不文明行為的驅(qū)動(dòng)要素。 Needless to say, it’s gotten pretty ugly out there. Some uncivil behavior may be too extreme to fix, and some people are unmotivated or unwilling to change; in my research, 4% of people report being rude because it’s fun and they can get away with it. But research shows that much of incivility can be reined in. To do that, we need to understand its drivers.

我們?yōu)楹蔚搅诉@個(gè)地步

How We Got Here

那么，為什么不文明現(xiàn)象似乎越來(lái)越嚴(yán)重？我的研究表明，是多方因素的綜合作用讓我們到了這個(gè)地步： So, why does it feel like incivility is getting worse? My research suggests that several compounding factors and pressures have brought us to this point:

壓力。

多年以來(lái)，我發(fā)現(xiàn)壓力始終是不文明行為的頭號(hào)驅(qū)動(dòng)因素。在我最近的數(shù)據(jù)里，曾經(jīng)粗魯對(duì)待同事的受訪者有73%將這種行為歸咎于壓力，61%的人說(shuō)是工作負(fù)擔(dān)太重。

Stress.?

Over the years, I’ve found that stress is the number one driver of incivility. In my most recent data, 73% of respondents who had been rude to a coworker blamed it on stress, and 61% pointed to being overloaded with work. 傳染病、經(jīng)濟(jì)、戰(zhàn)爭(zhēng)、政治觀點(diǎn)分化、工作性質(zhì)變化，以及持續(xù)的不確定性，都造成了巨大的影響。這些因素中的任意幾個(gè)（或者全部）都可能讓我們感到壓力或倦怠，特別是最近壓力和倦怠已經(jīng)達(dá)到了空前的水平。而且，考慮到我們的自我照顧、鍛煉和睡眠水平都有所下降，難以調(diào)節(jié)自己的情緒就不足為奇了。 The pandemic, the economy, war, divisive politics, the changing nature of work, and continued uncertainty are all taking a toll. Any (or all) of these factors may contribute to our?stress?and?burnout, which have risen to unprecedented levels recently. And considering our?reduced levels of self-care,?exercise, and?sleep, it’s no surprise that we have a tougher time regulating our emotions.

負(fù)面情緒。

2020年10月，我和兄弟邁克·波拉斯（Mike Porath）報(bào)告了來(lái)自The Mighty的數(shù)據(jù)。The Mighty是邁克為有健康難題的人以及他們的照料人建立的一個(gè)支持性社群。對(duì)七萬(wàn)多名讀者和社群成員進(jìn)行的問(wèn)卷調(diào)查發(fā)現(xiàn)，從3月到9月，選擇“憤怒”為自己最強(qiáng)烈情緒之一的參與者數(shù)量增加了一倍多，從20%上升到45%。

Negative emotions.

?In October 2020 my brother Mike Porath and I?reported?data from The Mighty, a supportive community Mike founded for people facing health challenges and those who care for them. A survey of over 70,000 readers and community members found that the number of respondents who chose anger as one of their top emotions more than doubled from March to September — rising from 20% to 45%. 心中涌動(dòng)負(fù)面情緒的時(shí)候，我們可能會(huì)發(fā)脾氣，或者把情緒發(fā)泄在別人身上，而且常常意識(shí)不到這一點(diǎn)。即使保持克制，當(dāng)我們不舒服時(shí)，在這方面的注意程度也會(huì)下降，更難用積極且尊重人的方式互動(dòng)。 Naturally, as negative emotions swell in us, we may lash out or take them out on others, often without realizing it. Even if we muster restraint, when we’re not feeling well we’re less mindful and less capable of?interacting positively and respectfully.

弱化的聯(lián)結(jié)。

我們也可以把粗魯行為蔓延的現(xiàn)象歸因于社群和工作場(chǎng)所普遍的人際關(guān)系破裂。我將“社群”定義為相互關(guān)心彼此福祉的一群人。2014年我為了撰寫《把握社群》（Mastering Community）一書，開(kāi)展了一項(xiàng)涵蓋2萬(wàn)人的研究，發(fā)現(xiàn)其中65%的人毫無(wú)社群意識(shí)。2022年7月，我和一名同事對(duì)參與女性大會(huì)的1500多人進(jìn)行問(wèn)卷調(diào)查，發(fā)現(xiàn)新冠流行以來(lái)這些人的社群意識(shí)下降了37%。

Weakened ties.?

We can also attribute the epidemic of rudeness to a general fraying of community and workplace relationships. I define “community” as a group of individuals who share a mutual concern for one another’s welfare. In a 2014 study of 20,000 people for my book?

Mastering Community

, I found that 65% didn’t feel any sense of community. In July of this year a colleague and I surveyed more than 1,500 Conference for Women participants, finding that their sense of community has?decreased 37% since the beginning of the pandemic. 如果人們感覺(jué)不到自己被重視、被欣賞或被傾聽(tīng)，缺乏社群的感受就會(huì)加劇——絕大多數(shù)員工都是這樣。有時(shí)微妙（或者沒(méi)那么微妙）的行為最讓人難受。在我最近的調(diào)查中，一名來(lái)自歐洲的參與者說(shuō)： The feeling of lacking community is exacerbated when people don’t feel valued, appreciated, or heard — which applies to the vast majority of employees. Sometimes subtle (or not-so-subtle) behaviors are what sting most. A European participant in my recent survey explained: 沒(méi)有發(fā)生什么——這就是最無(wú)禮的地方：一位資歷較淺的同事被某個(gè)級(jí)別較高的人徹底忽視了。他說(shuō)早上好，對(duì)方只是繼續(xù)往前走?！敛灰馔猓@位初級(jí)員工大概六個(gè)月之后就離職了。 Nothing happened — and that was the rudest part itself: A junior colleague got completely blanked by a more senior figure. He said good morning and the senior staff member just continued walking.…Not surprisingly, the junior person left after about six months.

技術(shù)。

技術(shù)有很多好處，但也可能導(dǎo)致更嚴(yán)重的脫節(jié)和不文明行為。正如許許多多的一線員工和收銀員所說(shuō)，技術(shù)還會(huì)讓我們分散注意力，不關(guān)注面前的人。我們往往忙著刷Instagram或者戴著耳機(jī)聽(tīng)音樂(lè)，顧不上跟為自己服務(wù)或結(jié)賬的人互動(dòng)——說(shuō)出簡(jiǎn)單的“你好”“請(qǐng)”或“謝謝你”的次數(shù)也減少了。

Technology.?

For all its benefits, technology can lead to greater disconnection and rudeness. It can also distract us from the humans in front of us, as countless frontline employees and cashiers have reported. Often we’re too busy scrolling through Instagram or listening to music on our headphones to interact with those serving us or ringing up our groceries — much less to utter a simple “Hello,” “Please,” or “Thank you.” 這種對(duì)技術(shù)的重度使用，特別是對(duì)社交媒體的使用，可能會(huì)讓我們付出代價(jià)。我們每天都在（有意識(shí)或無(wú)意識(shí)地）接收大量負(fù)面情緒。我們消費(fèi)的內(nèi)容不僅影響自己，也影響其他人。我們從網(wǎng)上獲取的東西可能影響我們的情緒和心理健康，而且我們也會(huì)把自己的焦慮、抑郁和壓力傳遞給別人。 This heavy use of technology, and of social media in particular, may come with a price: We’re taking in a whole lot of negativity (consciously or unconsciously) on a daily basis. The content we consume affects not only us but others too. What we ingest from online sources can harm our mood and mental health, and we can?pass our anxiety, depression, and stress on to others. 最后，在數(shù)字時(shí)代，信息往往會(huì)被溝通障礙和誤解影響——而不幸的是，辱罵更容易發(fā)生在非面對(duì)面交流的情況下。雖然電子通信以非凡的方式將我們集合在一起，卻也讓我們隔著一個(gè)安全的距離，自由地表達(dá)自己的挫敗感、辱罵和蔑視他人。 Finally, in the digital age?messages are often subject to communication gaps and misunderstanding?— and, unfortunately, putdowns are more easily delivered when it doesn’t happen face-to-face. While electronic communication can bring us together in remarkable ways, it also?liberates us to voice our frustrations, hurl insults, and take people down a notch from a safe distance.

缺乏自我意識(shí)。

我在幾十年的研究中得到的最大啟迪之一是，不文明行為通常源于無(wú)知，而非惡意。人們?nèi)狈ψ晕乙庾R(shí)。根據(jù)與我合作的組織心理學(xué)家塔莎·尤里克（Tasha Eurich）的研究，高達(dá)95%的人覺(jué)得自己有自我意識(shí)，但實(shí)際上能意識(shí)到自己行為的人只有10%到15%。這意味著80%到85%的人誤解了他人對(duì)自己的看法和自己對(duì)他人的影響。我們也許用意是好的，并且努力保持耐心和寬容，但我們的語(yǔ)氣、非語(yǔ)言信號(hào)或行動(dòng)，在互動(dòng)對(duì)象和互動(dòng)見(jiàn)證人看來(lái)，或許是別的意思。

Lack of self-awareness.?

One of the biggest takeaways from my decades of research is that incivility usually arises from ignorance — not malice. People lack self-awareness. According to?research by Tasha Eurich, an organizational psychologist and a collaborator of mine, a whopping 95% of people think they’re self-aware but only 10%–15% actually are. That means 80%–85% of people misunderstand how they’re perceived and how they affect others. We may have good intentions and work hard to be patient and tolerant, but our tones, nonverbal signals, or actions may come across differently to the people we interact with and those who witness the interactions.

不文明行為的代價(jià)

The Costs of Incivility

研究表明，不文明就像一般感冒：會(huì)傳染，傳播速度快，工作、家庭和社群中的任何人都可能是攜帶者，而且很容易就會(huì)被感染。 Research shows?that rudeness is like the common cold: It’s contagious, it spreads quickly, anyone can be a carrier — at work, at home, online, or in our communities — and getting infected doesn’t take much. 不文明行為擴(kuò)散，會(huì)在以下幾個(gè)方面影響人與組織。 When incivility does spread, it affects people and organizations in several ways.

不文明行為對(duì)身心的損害。

我的研究一再表明，不文明行為對(duì)身心兩方面都有影響。這與社會(huì)學(xué)家查爾斯·霍頓·庫(kù)利（Charles Horton Cooley）1902年提出的“鏡中自我（looking-glass self）”概念一致。這個(gè)概念解釋說(shuō)，我們用他人的表情（比如微笑或咆哮）、行為（如忽視我們或關(guān)注我們）和反應(yīng)（如傾聽(tīng)或貶低）來(lái)定義自己。我們關(guān)于他人對(duì)自己看法的認(rèn)知，塑造了自己的身份認(rèn)知和行為方式。簡(jiǎn)短的互動(dòng)傳達(dá)出尊重或不尊重的信號(hào)。我們認(rèn)可和感謝他人，對(duì)方會(huì)覺(jué)得受到了重視。我們貶低他人，會(huì)讓對(duì)方覺(jué)得自己渺小丑陋。

Incivility’s mental and physical toll.?

My research has shown over and over that incivility’s effects are both mental and physical. This tracks with sociologist Charles Horton Cooley’s 1902 notion of the “l(fā)ooking-glass self,” which explains that we use others’ expressions (e.g., smiles or snarls), behaviors (e.g., ignoring or paying attention to us), and reactions (e.g., listening or belittling) to define ourselves. How we believe others see us shapes who we are and how we behave. Brief interactions signal respect or disrespect. People feel valued when we acknowledge and thank them. When we cut people down, we make them feel smaller and uglier. 這有助于解釋不文明行為為何會(huì)產(chǎn)生極大的負(fù)面影響。僅僅是接觸到粗魯?shù)脑~語(yǔ)，都會(huì)降低我們處理和回憶信息的能力，機(jī)能失調(diào)和攻擊性的想法（有時(shí)是行為）會(huì)急速增加?？吹酱拄?shù)谋憩F(xiàn)和不文明行為的誘因，比如在社交媒體上看到一條討厭的評(píng)論，或者聽(tīng)到一場(chǎng)有爭(zhēng)議的采訪，會(huì)對(duì)認(rèn)知造成損害，干擾我們的工作記憶，影響表現(xiàn)。這類干擾可能極其嚴(yán)重。例如，已有研究證明，接觸粗魯行為會(huì)對(duì)醫(yī)療團(tuán)隊(duì)的診斷和流程表現(xiàn)產(chǎn)生負(fù)面影響。 These dynamics help to explain why the effects of incivility are so damaging. Merely being exposed to rude words reduces our ability to process and recall information. Dysfunctional and aggressive thoughts (and sometimes actions) can skyrocket.?Witnessing rudeness?and triggers of incivility — such as reading a nasty comment on social media or listening to an argumentative interview —?takes a cognitive toll, interfering with our working memory and decreasing our performance. And these disruptions can be catastrophic. For example, exposure to rudeness has been shown to?negatively impact medical teams’ diagnoses and procedural performance.

不文明行為在商業(yè)上的影響。

我最近的研究發(fā)現(xiàn)，人們看到員工或一線工人被粗魯對(duì)待，85%的人感到煩惱，80%感到不安，75%感到憤怒，此外還有61%的人表示自己感到痛苦，43%感覺(jué)受到威脅。

Incivility’s toll on business.?

In my recent research, I found that when people witness rude treatment of employees or frontline workers, 85% report being annoyed, 80% are upset, and 75% are angry. Additionally, 61% report being distressed and 43% feel threatened. 顧客看到其他顧客對(duì)員工無(wú)禮，會(huì)有幾種不同的反應(yīng)。他們對(duì)員工的態(tài)度會(huì)有所改善，但對(duì)員工所在組織的感受會(huì)發(fā)生轉(zhuǎn)變，而這種轉(zhuǎn)變對(duì)公司而言代價(jià)高昂：42%的人表示粗魯行為改變了自己對(duì)公司的看法，40%的人質(zhì)疑公司是否還想再做生意，65%的人認(rèn)為組織應(yīng)當(dāng)更好地保護(hù)員工，45%的人質(zhì)疑組織價(jià)值觀——總體而言，人們使用該公司產(chǎn)品及服務(wù)的意愿下降了35%。麥金尼斯、?？怂购臀野l(fā)現(xiàn)，這些感受與對(duì)人類尊嚴(yán)和他人是否得到尊重的關(guān)注緊密相連。 When customers witness other customers being uncivil to employees, they have a few responses. Their attitudes toward the employees improve, but their feelings toward the workers’ organization shift in costly ways: 42% report that the rude behavior changes their perception of the company, 40% question whether they want to do business there again, 65% think the organization should better protect its employees, 45% question its values — and, overall, people’s willingness to use the company’s products and services drops 35%.?MacInnis, Folkes, and I found?that these feelings are tied to concerns for human dignity and whether others are being treated respectfully.

組織如何應(yīng)對(duì)不文明行為

How Organizations Can Address Incivility

企業(yè)領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者不僅有責(zé)任在當(dāng)時(shí)和事后為員工應(yīng)對(duì)不文明行為提供支持，還要嘗試從最初就盡量減少這類行為。我在《職場(chǎng)禮儀2.0：提升人際交往能力的技巧》（Mastering Civility）一書中概述的“文明循環(huán)”（Cycle to Civility?）框架，分為四個(gè)部分，已有數(shù)十個(gè)組織使用。該框架涵蓋了員工體驗(yàn)全程：招聘、指導(dǎo)、評(píng)分和實(shí)踐。這套框架或許要由高管和人力資源部門領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者帶頭實(shí)施，不過(guò)任何人熟悉一下都能受益。而且雖然關(guān)注其中某一個(gè)步驟就能協(xié)助推動(dòng)你所在組織的文化更加文明禮貌，但如果同時(shí)進(jìn)行多個(gè)步驟，變化會(huì)發(fā)生得更快。 Business leaders have a responsibility not only to support their employees in dealing with incivility, both in the moment and afterward, but also to try to mitigate it in the first place. I’ve used the following four-part Cycle to Civility? framework, outlined in my book?

Mastering Civility

, in dozens of organizations. It covers the entire employee experience: recruiting, coaching, scoring, and practicing. While executives and HR leaders may take the lead on implementing the framework, anyone can benefit from being familiar with it. And although focusing on any of these steps individually will help move your organization’s culture toward civility, change will happen faster if you work on more than one at a time.

招聘。

培養(yǎng)社群意識(shí)，首先取決于招募怎樣的人，所以要明智地做出選擇。在招聘過(guò)程中，可以使用一些技巧了解求職者是否善于在一線應(yīng)對(duì)不文明行為，例如依靠結(jié)構(gòu)化行為面試，提出這樣的問(wèn)題：“講講你在工作中應(yīng)對(duì)壓力或沖突的一次經(jīng)歷。當(dāng)時(shí)你是怎么做的？”用后續(xù)問(wèn)題深入探究，注意對(duì)方的語(yǔ)氣、舉止和說(shuō)話節(jié)奏，這些方面或許可以有效地傳達(dá)他們的態(tài)度。此外，尋找那些有自我意識(shí)、改進(jìn)動(dòng)力、熱愛(ài)學(xué)習(xí)等特質(zhì)的求職者，他們往往可以通過(guò)培訓(xùn)學(xué)會(huì)妥善應(yīng)對(duì)不文明行為。再聊聊組織的價(jià)值觀，通過(guò)問(wèn)題了解對(duì)方過(guò)往的行為是否與組織價(jià)值觀一致。

Recruiting.?

?Fostering a feeling of community begins with who you hire — so choose wisely. During the hiring process, use techniques that will help reveal whether a candidate is well equipped to handle incivility on the front lines. Rely on structured behavioral interviews and ask questions like, “Tell me about a time when you’ve had to deal with stress or conflict at work. What did you do?” Use follow-up questions to probe deeper, and pay attention to the person’s tone, demeanor, and pace of speaking, which may provide useful indicators of their attitude. In addition, look for candidates who can be trained to respond well to incivility, including those who are self-aware and motivated to improve and who embrace learning. Talk about your organization’s values, and ask questions to understand how the person’s past behavior aligns with them. 這些建議在對(duì)待客戶時(shí)也同樣適用，因?yàn)楣芾碚呖赡芤馁M(fèi)大量時(shí)間、精力和注意力處理不文明行為造成的后果。如果你可以選擇為怎樣的客戶提供服務(wù)，那么就應(yīng)該問(wèn)一句，“這些客戶真的值得嗎？”為什么不調(diào)查一下客戶公司的名聲，了解一下對(duì)方的員工會(huì)如何對(duì)待你的員工？我認(rèn)識(shí)的一位創(chuàng)始人向一些客戶收取“高昂的維護(hù)費(fèi)用”，金額依據(jù)對(duì)方的難纏程度而定，有時(shí)高達(dá)該公司正常服務(wù)價(jià)格的1.5倍。 Recruiting applies to clients and customers too, since managers can spend an extraordinary amount of time, energy, and focus dealing with the fallout of uncivil actions. If you’re in a position to choose the clients you serve, it’s worth asking, “Are they really worth it?” Why not investigate their reputations and how their people are likely to treat yours? One founder I know charged some clients a “high-maintenance tax” that took into account how challenging they were to deal with, sometimes amounting to 1.5x the normal price of the company’s services.

指導(dǎo)。

培訓(xùn)員工處理顧客的不良行為，是創(chuàng)造一個(gè)更文明工作場(chǎng)所的重要部分。同等重要的是，確定你希望這些顧客與患者如何對(duì)待你的員工，并引導(dǎo)他們朝著你期望的行為發(fā)展。采取以下幾個(gè)步驟會(huì)有所幫助：

Coaching.

?Training your employees to handle bad behavior from customers is a critical component of creating a more civil workplace. Just as important is determining how you expect those customers and patients to treat your employees and steering them toward that desired behavior. Taking a few steps can help. 首先，為人與人的交流制定期望和規(guī)范，并說(shuō)明當(dāng)其他人不遵守規(guī)范時(shí)人們?cè)撛趺醋觥?First, set expectations and establish norms for how people interact with one another, and for what they should do when others don’t adhere to the norms. 馬薩諸塞州UMass紀(jì)念醫(yī)院引入了對(duì)患者和訪客的行為準(zhǔn)則，準(zhǔn)則中正式規(guī)定了對(duì)其行為的規(guī)范和期望。在園區(qū)信息站和辦公室，來(lái)訪者被要求簽署協(xié)議，同意遵守行為準(zhǔn)則。UMass紀(jì)念醫(yī)院還制定了一套口頭語(yǔ)言模板，供員工用于應(yīng)對(duì)他人的不文明行為，其中有“停止（有問(wèn)題的行為），否則（行為造成的后果）”這樣的句式，如“停止對(duì)我嚷嚷，否則我更難給你母親喂藥”。 UMass Memorial Health, a health care network in Massachusetts, has introduced a patient and visitor code of conduct. At kiosks on campuses and in offices, visitors are asked to sign an agreement to adhere to the code of conduct, which formalizes the parameters and expectations of their behavior. UMass Memorial has also established a verbal template that employees can use to respond to someone’s incivility, which includes:?

Either you stop [the problematic behavior], or [the result of the behavior].

?For example, “Either you stop yelling at me, or it’s going to make it harder for me to give your mother her meds.” 績(jī)效、學(xué)習(xí)和教育高級(jí)主管勞拉·弗林（Laura Flynn）說(shuō)，目標(biāo)是創(chuàng)造一個(gè)相互尊重、安全的環(huán)境。UMass紀(jì)念醫(yī)院試行新計(jì)劃時(shí)收集和分析了反饋意見(jiàn)，并且嘗試了一些可選方案以改善結(jié)果。短短一個(gè)月內(nèi)，有5.6萬(wàn)份遵守行為準(zhǔn)則的協(xié)議得到簽署，在此期間只有四名來(lái)訪者被要求離開(kāi)。 The goal, says Laura Flynn, senior director of performance, learning, and education, is to create a respectful, safe environment. When UMass Memorial Health piloted the new program, it collected and analyzed feedback and experimented with options to improve outcomes. In just over a month, it had more than 56,000 signed agreements for the code of conduct — and only four visitors were asked to leave during that time. 其次，鼓勵(lì)和培訓(xùn)員工表達(dá)同理心。在與他人互動(dòng)時(shí)表現(xiàn)出同理心，可能需要用到談判、壓力管理、困難對(duì)話和正念等方面的技能。組織需要指導(dǎo)員工學(xué)習(xí)這些技能，以及充分傾聽(tīng)、給予和接受反饋（包括積極反饋和糾正性質(zhì)的反饋）、在工作中跨越差異，以及應(yīng)對(duì)棘手的人。具備這些技能的員工可以更好地應(yīng)對(duì)不文明行為。 Second, encourage and train employees to show empathy. Being empathetic in interactions with others can require skills in negotiation, stress management, difficult conversations, and mindfulness. Organizations need to coach employees in these skills, as well as in listening fully, giving and receiving feedback (both positive and corrective), working across differences, and dealing with difficult people. People who possess these skills are better equipped to deal with incivility. 阿德里安娜·布瓦西醫(yī)生在克利夫蘭診所擔(dān)任首席患者體驗(yàn)官時(shí)，推出了一個(gè)八小時(shí)的課程，讓醫(yī)生進(jìn)行角色扮演，討論如何更好地與患者對(duì)話、表達(dá)自己的護(hù)理意向。研究表明，參與該課程的1500位醫(yī)生表達(dá)同理心的能力在統(tǒng)計(jì)學(xué)上出現(xiàn)了顯著的增長(zhǎng)，對(duì)患者體驗(yàn)產(chǎn)生了積極的影響。培訓(xùn)還減少了醫(yī)生的職業(yè)倦怠和情緒枯竭，課程結(jié)束后這種效果能持續(xù)三個(gè)月——說(shuō)明指導(dǎo)員工與患者或顧客互動(dòng)成效顯著。 When Dr. Adrienne Boissy was the chief patient experience officer at Cleveland Clinic, she rolled out an eight-hour course where physicians role-played scenarios about how to have better conversations with patients to express their intention of care. In a?study of 1,500 physicians?who participated, there was a statistically significant and positive impact on their capacity for empathy, which had a positive effect on patient experience. The training also reduced burnout and emotional exhaustion among physicians, an effect that persisted for three months after the completion of the course — suggesting that the payoff for coaching employees who interact with patients or customers is significant. 思考為何有人不文明，同樣有助于培養(yǎng)同理心。比如，持續(xù)不斷的壓力和有挑戰(zhàn)性的環(huán)境令許多人苦苦掙扎。佛羅里達(dá)的醫(yī)療機(jī)構(gòu)浸會(huì)醫(yī)療（Baptist Health）高級(jí)副總裁兼首席人事官阿德里安·麥科伊（Adriene McCoy）告訴我，該機(jī)構(gòu)的領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者在指導(dǎo)員工回應(yīng)同事、患者及家屬的不文明行為時(shí)，提出行動(dòng)之前停一拍。她說(shuō)：“人們壓力太大，往往只是下意識(shí)地反應(yīng)，沒(méi)有思考原因?！?Also helpful for empathy is considering why someone is being uncivil. Many people are struggling with ongoing stress and challenging circumstances, for example. Adriene McCoy, senior vice president and chief people officer of Baptist Health, a health care organization in Florida, told me that its leaders are coaching employees to take a beat before responding to uncivil colleagues, patients, and families. “People are so stressed that we often just react instead of thinking about why,” McCoy said. 我的研究表明了這種方法的價(jià)值。在工作中碰到無(wú)禮行為時(shí)，先停下來(lái)試著代入不文明者的立場(chǎng)。“某人的行為可能是由于癡呆、劇烈疼痛、行為障礙、成癮等引起的?！瓉?lái)醫(yī)院的人都是因?yàn)橛龅搅藛?wèn)題，狀態(tài)都不好。”弗林這樣說(shuō)道。因此遇到有人做法不文明時(shí)，想一想：我是否了解全部情況？還有一點(diǎn)很重要：對(duì)其行為最寬厚的解釋是什么？在壓力大或感到筋疲力盡時(shí)，這個(gè)問(wèn)題尤其重要。在停止對(duì)話、拒絕或表現(xiàn)出沮喪之前，嘗試?yán)斫鈱?duì)方的處境。你甚至還可以更進(jìn)一步，問(wèn)：有什么我可以幫助他們的？ My research shows the value of this approach. When you encounter rude behavior at work, pause and try to put yourself in the uncivil person’s position. “Someone’s behavior could be due to dementia, intense pain, behavioral challenges, addiction.…People come to the hospital when they’re really challenged — not on their best day,” Flynn notes. So when someone is uncivil, ask yourself:?

Do I have the whole argument?

?And, importantly:?

What’s the most generous interpretation of their behavior?

?This question is especially valuable when you’re stressed or feeling burned out. Before shutting down, saying no, or displaying frustration, try to appreciate where the other person is. You might even go one step further and ask,?

How can I help them?

最后，推動(dòng)顧客和患者產(chǎn)生同理心。給出簡(jiǎn)短、個(gè)性化且明確的行動(dòng)建議，這一做法在包括零售和醫(yī)療機(jī)構(gòu)在內(nèi)的各種場(chǎng)合都被證明是有效的。 Finally, nudge customers and patients toward empathy. Nudges — short, personalized recommendations with a clear call to action — have proven useful in a variety of settings,?including retail and health care. 麥科伊回想，她在新冠流行時(shí)走進(jìn)一家星巴克，點(diǎn)的飲品沒(méi)有按照她的要求做，她很生氣，然后看見(jiàn)墻上的標(biāo)語(yǔ)：“留在這里的人是自己選擇在這里的。”“這讓我難以忘懷。”她說(shuō)。店里的員工只是普通人，在困難時(shí)期竭盡全力?！八运麄儧](méi)給我加我點(diǎn)的小料，那就算了吧。” McCoy recalls going into a Starbucks during the pandemic and feeling annoyed when her drink wasn’t made as she’d asked it to be. Then she saw a sign on the wall that read “People who are here chose to be here.” “This stuck with me,” she says. The employees were just human beings doing their best during a difficult time. “So they didn’t put drizzle on my drink. I moved on.” 除了行為準(zhǔn)則，UMass紀(jì)念醫(yī)院已經(jīng)開(kāi)始用標(biāo)牌提示患者和訪客采取文明行為。一進(jìn)醫(yī)院就能看到一個(gè)歡迎牌，上面寫著“幫助我們維護(hù)這個(gè)療愈、善良和彼此尊重的安全空間”，下面用小字寫著醫(yī)院的尊重守則。第二塊標(biāo)牌放在病房和急診科，寫著患者和訪客的行為準(zhǔn)則，說(shuō)明了不可接受的行為，如大喊大叫、咒罵、吐唾沫，以及做出有關(guān)種族或宗教的冒犯言論。勞拉·弗林告訴我，嘗試用標(biāo)牌和提示保護(hù)員工，是一種微妙的平衡，“因?yàn)楸仨氉⒁饷恳晃换颊吆驮L客的情況，而且不能讓他們覺(jué)得是在教訓(xùn)他們。” n addition to its code-of-conduct agreements, UMass Memorial Health has begun displaying signage to nudge patients and visitors toward respectful behavior. Upon arrival, they see a welcome sign that says “Help us keep this a safe space of healing, kindness, and respect.” In a small font at the bottom are the hospital’s?standards of respect. A second sign, placed in units and the emergency department, has the patient and visitor code of conduct, which spells out unacceptable behavior such as yelling, swearing, spitting, and making offensive remarks about race, ethnicity, or religion. Laura Flynn told me that trying to protect employees with signs and nudges is a delicate balance “because you have to be sensitive to each patient and visitor’s circumstance, and it can’t feel like a hammer [to them].”

評(píng)分。

要顯示文明禮貌對(duì)組織的重要意義，最令人信服的一種方法是認(rèn)可并獎(jiǎng)勵(lì)這種行為。表示贊賞可以減少倦怠，提升員工留職率、心理健康和幸福感。績(jī)效考核時(shí)不要只關(guān)注結(jié)果，還要考慮工作方式，對(duì)員工做出的所有貢獻(xiàn)（包括應(yīng)對(duì)不文明行為）表示感謝。認(rèn)可或許無(wú)法彌補(bǔ)他們?cè)馐艿呐按梢詭椭鷨T工感受到社群在支持自己、認(rèn)可自己提供的護(hù)理——或是單純?yōu)樗麄兡軄?lái)上班這件事表示感謝。

Scoring.?

?One of the most compelling ways to show how much civility matters to your organization is to recognize and reward it. Gestures of appreciation, for example, can help?reduce burnout,?promote retention, and aid mental health and?well-being. When reviewing performance, don’t just focus on the results; also consider the?

how?

of the work by expressing gratitude for the full contributions people make, which includes handling uncivil behavior. Recognition may not make up for the abuse they’re weathering, but it helps people feel like their community is backing them and appreciates the care they’re delivering — or simply the fact that they’re showing up. 同伴是一個(gè)尚未充分發(fā)揮作用的贊賞來(lái)源?？梢钥紤]制定一個(gè)同伴認(rèn)可項(xiàng)目，如股票顧問(wèn)公司莫特利愚人投資（The Motley Fool）的“愚人之金”（Fool’s Gold）項(xiàng)目。每位員工都會(huì)得到一份“金子”，可以分給同事，對(duì)他們值得贊賞的任何行為表示認(rèn)可。金子可以兌換為禮品卡及其他獎(jiǎng)勵(lì)。還有實(shí)時(shí)的贊賞信息反饋，讓員工閱讀同事發(fā)布的所有贊美，這樣可以分享信息，并慶祝與工作成果及方式相關(guān)的成就。 Peers are an underutilized source of appreciation. Consider using a peer-to-peer recognition program, like the?Fool’s Gold program?at stock adviser The Motley Fool. Each employee is given an allotment of “gold” that they can dole out to their coworkers to recognize them for any action they feel is worthy. Employees can redeem the gold for gift cards and other rewards. There’s also a recognition live feed that allows employees to read all posted compliments. It’s a way to share information and celebrate accomplishments related to both results and the?

how

?of work.

實(shí)踐。

確保員工擁有必要的工具，可以保護(hù)自己在當(dāng)下和以后免受不文明行為的影響。

Practice.?

Make sure your employees have the tools they need to protect themselves from uncivil behavior — both in the moment and over time. 首先制定和實(shí)行關(guān)于緩和沖突的培訓(xùn)與協(xié)議。為緊張對(duì)話降溫的能力，以及應(yīng)對(duì)難纏的患者或顧客的明確協(xié)議，在一線是非常寶貴的。例如在UMass紀(jì)念醫(yī)院，員工會(huì)根據(jù)職責(zé)接受各種形式的沖突緩和培訓(xùn)，而且團(tuán)隊(duì)可以自行決定行動(dòng)準(zhǔn)則。面對(duì)不良行為，員工會(huì)嘗試自行緩和，如果不成功，他們會(huì)讓管理者介入。如果這樣還是沒(méi)有效果，他們就會(huì)打電話給患者工作支持人員尋求幫助。患者工作支持團(tuán)隊(duì)通常會(huì)咨詢質(zhì)量和安全團(tuán)隊(duì)，必要時(shí)咨詢首席醫(yī)療官。 Start by implementing and enacting de-escalation training and protocols. On the front lines, having the skills to bring down the temperature of a tense conversation, as well as a clear protocol for handling a difficult patient or customer, is invaluable. For example, at UMass Memorial, employees receive training in various forms of de-escalation depending on their role, and teams have the discretion to define what they act on. If employees face bad behavior, they attempt to de-escalate it on their own. If their efforts aren’t successful, they get their manager involved. If that doesn’t work, they call the patient advocacy staff for guidance about how to move forward. Patient advocacy teams often consult with quality and safety staff and even the chief medical officer if necessary. 然后鼓勵(lì)員工恢復(fù)，并做出示范。因?yàn)榻?jīng)歷和目睹不文明行為會(huì)對(duì)身心健康造成不良影響，一定要讓員工照顧好自己——組織為他們提供需要的工具，這點(diǎn)至關(guān)重要。阿德里安·麥科伊告訴我，一次一位同事對(duì)她說(shuō)，“我變得很‘脆’?！币簿褪切约币着?。當(dāng)時(shí)她鼓勵(lì)同事好好照顧自己，現(xiàn)在她會(huì)注意定期評(píng)估自己的倦怠程度。麥科伊還協(xié)助員工意識(shí)到自己何時(shí)接近“完全烤焦”，需要采取行動(dòng)避免這種狀況。 Then encourage and model recovery. Because experiencing and witnessing incivility has detrimental effects on mental and physical health, it’s critical that people take care of themselves — and that organizations give them the tools they need to do it. Adriene McCoy told me that a colleague once said to her, “I’m getting crispy” — that is, short-tempered. McCoy encouraged the colleague to take care of themself, and now she’s careful to regularly gauge her own level of burnout. She also empowers employees to recognize when they’re approaching “fully baked” and need to take action to prevent it. 如果你是一名領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者，你的自我照顧會(huì)向員工發(fā)出一個(gè)強(qiáng)有力的信號(hào)。要讓大家看到你休息，比如在日程表上留出整段的休息時(shí)間，或者去度假。我與能源工程（The Energy Project）公司CEO托尼·施瓦茨（Tony Schwartz）的研究表明，領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者明確鼓勵(lì)員工以更可持續(xù)的方式工作，并且以身作則，員工投入度會(huì)提升55%，注意力提升53%，而且更有可能繼續(xù)留在公司。 If you’re a leader, your self-care sends employees a powerful signal. Be visible about taking breaks, such as by blocking off time for them on your daily calendar or going on vacation.?My research?with Tony Schwartz, CEO of The Energy Project, shows that when leaders explicitly encourage employees to work in more sustainable ways and model that behavior themselves, their employees are 55% more engaged, 53% more focused, and much more likely to stay at the company. 同時(shí)，我對(duì)MBA、EMBA和員工的研究都一致表明，工作以外的發(fā)展有助于在工作上的成功，因?yàn)榭梢栽黾忧楦袃?chǔ)備，灌輸成長(zhǎng)和學(xué)習(xí)的感覺(jué)。我對(duì)經(jīng)歷過(guò)不文明行為的人的研究中，表示自己在非工作活動(dòng)中有所發(fā)展的人，其健康狀況比不文明行為經(jīng)歷者好80%，在工作上的積極性提高了89%，應(yīng)對(duì)不文明行為的滿意度高出38%。 Studies?I’ve done of MBAs, executive MBAs, and employees, meanwhile, have consistently shown that thriving outside of work helps you thrive at work by increasing your emotional reserves and instilling a sense of growth and learning. In my research on people who experienced incivility, those who reported thriving in nonwork activities reported 80% better health, 89% greater thriving at work, and 38% more satisfaction with how they handled the incivility. 鼓勵(lì)員工和同事在工作之外好好生活，用能帶來(lái)快樂(lè)和意義的人與活動(dòng)給自己充電。領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者也要展示自己在工作之外的熱情所在。如果可能，可以讓員工自己選擇工作地點(diǎn)和時(shí)間，而且保證他們隨時(shí)能請(qǐng)假。 Encourage your employees and colleagues to have lives outside of work, to fill their buckets with people and activities that bring them joy and meaning. Publicize your nonwork passions, too. When possible, provide employees with choice about where and when they do their work, and always make sure they can take time off. 不文明行為會(huì)傳染。所幸，文明的感染力也一樣大。我們無(wú)法控制顧客的行為，但可以制定和執(zhí)行尊重人的行為規(guī)范，指導(dǎo)員工處理困難對(duì)話，并展示休息和恢復(fù)的價(jià)值，協(xié)助員工應(yīng)對(duì)不良行為。我的研究證實(shí)，善意、體貼和尊重可以發(fā)揮強(qiáng)大的效果，創(chuàng)造一種積極的文明動(dòng)力，讓他人甚至是那些粗魯?shù)念櫩妥龀龈M(jìn)或改進(jìn)等的回應(yīng)，并以此為基礎(chǔ)繼續(xù)發(fā)展。 Incivility is contagious. Fortunately, civility’s power to spread is just as great. We can’t control what customers do, but we can equip our employees to handle bad behavior by establishing and enforcing norms of respect, coaching them to have difficult conversations, and showing them the value of rest and recovery. My research confirms that kindness, consideration, and respect can have a potent effect, creating a positive dynamic of civility that others — maybe even those rude customers — will respond to and build on. 克里斯汀·波拉斯是喬治敦大學(xué)管理學(xué)教授，也是一名協(xié)助領(lǐng)先企業(yè)創(chuàng)造繁榮工作場(chǎng)所的咨詢顧問(wèn)。她的著作有《把握社群：團(tuán)結(jié)起來(lái)讓我們從生存走向繁榮》（Mastering Community: The Surprising Ways Coming Together Moves Us from Surviving to Thriving）、《職場(chǎng)禮儀2.0：提升人際交往能力的技巧》（Mastering Civility: A Manifesto for the Workplace）以及與人合著的《不良行為的代價(jià)》（The Cost of Bad Behavior）。 克里斯汀·波拉斯（Christine Porath) | 文?? 蔣薈蓉 | 譯??時(shí)青靖 | 校??廖琦菁 | 編輯