本章概述：

????????????伊莎萊接受死亡。

????????????In which Isarae submits to death.

?

正文：

這不公平。

我知道，這么想很幼稚。以我這個(gè)年齡，見證了如此多的不公并親手犯下了其中的大部分，卻又覺得生活對(duì)我來(lái)說是如此的不公平，這真的很幼稚。

又或者不是。

我稍微打開了噴氣摩托的節(jié)流閥，并開始以低功率掃描與亞歷莎的動(dòng)力甲核心發(fā)出的信號(hào)相符的特征，與此同時(shí)，一股苦澀的灰燼逐漸積壓在了我的胸中。我能做的不過是在城里四處游蕩并搜索，可也許那也是一種幸運(yùn)。

在與亞歷莎的交談之后……或是說爭(zhēng)執(zhí)？我們剛剛發(fā)生了爭(zhēng)執(zhí)嗎？我覺得某種程度上確實(shí)如此，盡管如此我知道自己現(xiàn)在無(wú)法面對(duì)她。我太過生氣，太過憤恨，雖說這么想還是很幼稚，可說真的……

我有的選嗎？

生于科摩羅。

長(zhǎng)于科摩羅。

我本還能成為別的什么嗎？

誘使我進(jìn)入巫靈教派的是出于必要而非自愿，不過我也不能說自己是被囚禁在那里，不是嗎？說到底，我心甘情愿地追求殺戮的藝術(shù)以此聲名鵲起，屠戮了競(jìng)爭(zhēng)者以踏著尸堆爬上統(tǒng)領(lǐng)魅魔的浮夸地位。

我的頭發(fā)在巢都潮濕的風(fēng)中像一面猩紅色的旗幟一樣在我身邊拍打著，我隱約地意識(shí)到自己應(yīng)該稍加小心，可真的，我不在乎。我的噴氣摩托上的匿蹤技術(shù)確保我只要不超出基本推力就永遠(yuǎn)不會(huì)被探測(cè)到，哪怕是阿蘇焉信徒的探測(cè)器也一樣，我也毫無(wú)疑問地可以在看到獸人前就聽見他們。

至于人類？我正主動(dòng)搜索著他們呢。

搜尋著亞歷莎的人，以便我能把她還給他們。

這樣的想法令我心如刀絞。

我好奇如果有的選的話，我會(huì)不會(huì)做出別的選擇。我一直以來(lái)都沒得選，在某種程度上，缺少可選項(xiàng)是我們這個(gè)種族的宿命。

沒有一個(gè)黑暗精靈或阿蘇焉信徒在他們的生命中有可能有過一個(gè)真正意義上的可選項(xiàng)。我們生來(lái)就是個(gè)垂死的種族，繼承了受污染的遺產(chǎn)，也是一個(gè)支離破碎的帝國(guó)的后代。黑暗靈族必須取悅饑渴者，不然就會(huì)被一個(gè)亞空間神祇吞噬，而阿蘇焉之子嗣必須在清醒時(shí)的每分每秒都?jí)褐谱∽约旱撵`魂，不然也會(huì)遭受相同的災(zāi)厄。

魂石確保了阿蘇焉之子嗣的安全，而我的黑暗精靈之饑渴（Druchi Thirst）保護(hù)著我的靈魂，但兩者皆是牢籠。一個(gè)是晶體，一個(gè)是血肉，均服務(wù)于避免我們的靈魂被消化這個(gè)唯一的目的，而那是我們僅有的選擇。

我們?cè)撊绾巫屪约夯钕聛?lái)？

我們?yōu)榱嘶钕聛?lái)能犯下怎樣的暴行？

我放慢了噴氣摩托的速度使之逐漸停了下來(lái)，我駐足于此，嘆了口氣，凝視著腳下城市的開闊鴻溝。

“為了生存，我愿意做什么？”我輕聲問道。

我想到了亞歷桑德拉。我想起了她的嘴唇，她的味道，她在我的懷抱里的感覺。我想到了她的靈魂的滋味，往我的胸膛中充滿純粹的力量的金色陽(yáng)光的味道。我想到她在我的身下融化，隨著我一遍遍的索取而愈發(fā)虛弱，直到幾乎變成了一具空殼，為了在我殺死她時(shí)仍服從我的需求而被逼瘋。

“不是那樣的，”我咬著嘴唇重新打開節(jié)流閥?！?strong>永遠(yuǎn)不會(huì)是那樣。”

如果這就是我們的宿命的話，那我樂見自己的死亡。我已經(jīng)毒害過亞歷莎，而我再也不會(huì)這么做了。

我無(wú)聲地飄過巢都的大街小巷，一邊貼著墻壁并浮在陽(yáng)臺(tái)下面，一邊以低功率掃描。我時(shí)不時(shí)地會(huì)聽到一陣提示音，但并沒有什么切實(shí)的存在，所有的都不過像是掃描儀的故障，不過是碰巧短暫地打到特定波長(zhǎng)上的能量反射罷了。

“還有多少像她那樣的人？”我思考著?！斑@里還有人類嗎？”我對(duì)這個(gè)想法做了個(gè)鬼臉，一部分是因?yàn)樽约哼€沒遇到過這種情況。

這座巢都無(wú)比龐大，不過獸人的Waaagh也一樣。很有可能，在我們沉浸在居家生活的幻想中無(wú)所事事的這三十多個(gè)晝夜里，亞歷莎的同類已經(jīng)輸?shù)袅诉@場(chǎng)戰(zhàn)爭(zhēng)，并已經(jīng)要么撤退，要么被消滅干凈，要么被獸人奴役。

如果情況真的是這樣，那我覺得亞歷莎沒有回到他們之間就是最好的情況。即便她勇敢而強(qiáng)大，她也只不過是單一的一個(gè)戰(zhàn)士，如果這場(chǎng)戰(zhàn)爭(zhēng)只用了三十天就迎來(lái)終局，那單獨(dú)一個(gè)士兵也改變不了什么。

她只會(huì)和其他人死在一起。

“不，”我喃喃道，為了擴(kuò)大搜索范圍，我冒險(xiǎn)稍微調(diào)高了噴氣摩托上的掃描儀的功率。“人類是很多種東西，但他們沒這么容易壞掉……我一定是找錯(cuò)地方了?！?/p>

盡管這可能冒更大的風(fēng)險(xiǎn)，我還是更多地打開了噴氣摩托的節(jié)流閥并超過了高推力的水平，接入了主重力驅(qū)動(dòng)器。我能品味到天氣變化的味道，嘗到了臭氧和化學(xué)污染的雨水的滋味。一場(chǎng)巨大的風(fēng)暴正在降臨，如果我不能盡快找到人類部隊(duì)的話那就再也找不到了。

如果我的直覺沒錯(cuò)，那這場(chǎng)風(fēng)暴會(huì)持續(xù)數(shù)周，到那時(shí)我就會(huì)……

好吧，那時(shí)我就不適合進(jìn)行任何類型的搜索了。我得趕快找到他們。

我的沮喪隨著時(shí)間流逝逐漸增長(zhǎng)。我時(shí)不時(shí)地聽到提示音，可什么都沒有。這一個(gè)信號(hào)，那一個(gè)標(biāo)記點(diǎn)，可每次我前去查看都一無(wú)所獲。我的腦袋也變得昏沉，身體越來(lái)越冷……我的思維變得遲鈍，我一邊咒罵著自己是個(gè)愚鈍的惡棍一邊到達(dá)了我為自己標(biāo)記出來(lái)的邊緣地帶。

什么都沒有。

只有傳感器故障和被遺忘的尸體。

我咒罵著甩起噴氣摩托。我得盡快回到尖塔那里。風(fēng)暴幾乎要到達(dá)巢都上空了，冰冷的雨滴已經(jīng)落了下來(lái)。在幾個(gè)小時(shí)內(nèi)這座飽經(jīng)戰(zhàn)火的城市就會(huì)被降雨包圍。

“伊莎萊你這可悲的傻子，”我罵罵咧咧地把噴氣摩托對(duì)準(zhǔn)家的方向?！澳銕滋烨熬驮撟鲞@件事了，而不是等到以后一刻?！?/p>

我又一次打開節(jié)流閥并向前傾身，怒火又一次涌上心頭，我穿過寒風(fēng)冷雨，壓低姿態(tài)進(jìn)入了我和亞歷莎的住所所在的尖塔層。

現(xiàn)在雨下得愈發(fā)密集，以前我的生理機(jī)能會(huì)直接靠發(fā)熱來(lái)補(bǔ)償，而現(xiàn)在我卻瑟瑟發(fā)抖。我麻木的手指幾乎感覺不到對(duì)噴氣摩托的控制，隨著我試圖靠加速來(lái)盡快回到安全地帶，狂風(fēng)的呼嘯灌滿了我的耳朵。

因此，也難怪我在子彈擊中散架的發(fā)動(dòng)機(jī)外殼并炸毀驅(qū)動(dòng)歧管前沒能聽到爆彈槍的開火聲。

隨著局部重力場(chǎng)的劇烈失穩(wěn)，我周邊的物理法則一下子亂了套，我猛地拉起轉(zhuǎn)向桿，噴氣摩托劇烈地前后顛簸，試圖在劇烈震顫的推進(jìn)器把我砸進(jìn)尖塔的外墻前重新取回控制權(quán)。

我勉強(qiáng)將載具晃到足夠低的高度以試著穿過兩棟尖塔之間的一條大道，噴氣摩托高亢的尖叫聲隨即刺進(jìn)了我的耳膜。

我一邊罵出一長(zhǎng)串臟話一邊跳下車座，在風(fēng)雨中扭動(dòng)身體以釋放我的動(dòng)量，但我還是狠狠地撞到了地面上以至挫傷了肌肉和骨骼。我看著噴氣摩托旋轉(zhuǎn)著飛出了幾米遠(yuǎn)，然后便被臨界的發(fā)動(dòng)機(jī)劇烈地引爆在半空中。

我意識(shí)到的下一個(gè)爆炸聲以外的聲響則是一陣靴子的踏擊，一聲聲熟悉的，著動(dòng)力甲的沉重腳步從我的左右逼近。

又一聲咒罵緊接著上一句，我以決死沖鋒的速度起跑，一路沖進(jìn)小巷子中尋求庇護(hù)，雙腿在撞擊下火辣辣地疼。

我怎么會(huì)沒有探測(cè)到他們？而我唯一的解釋就是我的注意力衰退了。我的敏銳度正在與活力一同流失，我正凍得瑟瑟發(fā)抖……而且，他們不是粗魯?shù)墨F人；我身后靴子的踏擊聲肯定是帝國(guó)的紀(jì)律條令生效時(shí)發(fā)出的聲音。動(dòng)力甲的重量表明這并不是普通士兵。

也不是基因強(qiáng)化戰(zhàn)士。

那它在這個(gè)世界上只意味著一件事……我正在被亞歷莎的姐妹們追逐。

于是我拔腿就跑。

我呼吸沉重，四肢僵硬，而且我能聽到她們緊追不舍。如果我仍處于巔峰狀態(tài)的話就不會(huì)有這場(chǎng)追逐賽，但我現(xiàn)在太過虛弱，她們最終還是會(huì)抓到我。

我繼續(xù)奔跑著。

至少，我的方向感目前還足夠強(qiáng)，我知道只要能到達(dá)那座尖塔我就能擺脫她們。歷經(jīng)了這么多天的閑逛我已經(jīng)對(duì)它的內(nèi)部結(jié)構(gòu)了如指掌，我也自信能在這片殘?jiān)珨啾谥刑用撍齻兊淖凡丁?/p>

我只需要——

當(dāng)我正離開一條小巷子時(shí)，爆彈槍的轟鳴驟然響起，我猛地彈到一邊，求生本能和反應(yīng)力驅(qū)使著我一頭鉆了出去。

一發(fā)爆彈在我的胸口原本所在的石墻上引爆。這一槍瞄得很準(zhǔn)，如果被打中的話我就會(huì)當(dāng)場(chǎng)斃命。

更多的槍聲隨著我在爆炸間舞蹈而四處響起。我的剃刀連枷一次次地飛速擺動(dòng)，分段的刀片截住，切開，并偏轉(zhuǎn)了零星的火力，直至我到達(dá)了發(fā)現(xiàn)自己所在的廣場(chǎng)中心。

“?；?！”

一個(gè)渾厚而文雅的聲音喊出了這道命令，武器的開火聲瞬間安靜了下來(lái)。與此同時(shí)，我才伴著一絲惡心的諷刺感意識(shí)到自己在哪。

到處都是死去的獸人，最引人注目的是一座腐爛到幾乎只留下了降解產(chǎn)物和自身扭曲的掠奪本能的尸堆。我甚至可以看到下面的廣場(chǎng)上的一些圖畫，上面鋪滿了凝固的血液。

我已經(jīng)回到了一切開始的地方。我救下了亞歷莎的性命，并籍此無(wú)可挽回地改變了自己的人生的地方。

多么相配啊。

“你敢動(dòng)就得死，異形女巫，”那個(gè)聲音說道，不時(shí)被裝甲靴的快速運(yùn)動(dòng)打斷。

被連續(xù)射擊揚(yáng)起的塵土已然落定，與此同時(shí)我看清了她們：十幾個(gè)修女在我面前排成一列，大約兩個(gè)小隊(duì)，如果我記得準(zhǔn)和亞歷莎的對(duì)話的話。她們中的每一個(gè)都用爆彈槍瞄準(zhǔn)了我的身上的不同部位，確保一旦我想做什么就能打出致命一擊。

說話的人——一個(gè)更為高大，身材結(jié)實(shí)，穿著華美的動(dòng)力甲的女性——從其他女人中走了出來(lái)。她剃著禿頭，只留著一頂金屬無(wú)檐帽和一條銀色的辮子，臉上傷痕累累，飽經(jīng)風(fēng)霜，她的雙眼截然不同，一只是銳利，澄澈的藍(lán)色眼睛，另一只則是中間閃著逼人的紅光的義眼。

“艾達(dá)靈族，”她冰冷地對(duì)我說?！澳愕拇嬖谑菍?duì)神圣陛下的侮辱，而你出現(xiàn)于此即是異端行徑。”

我沒有回答，也沒做出動(dòng)作。相反，我緊盯著她，她也毫無(wú)懼意地迎上我的目光。

“我會(huì)給你一個(gè)效力的機(jī)會(huì)，”她繼續(xù)說道?！澳銈円蛔迨鞘┡翱?，海盜，也是可憎之物，但你們不會(huì)單獨(dú)行動(dòng)……你剩下的褻瀆同類都在哪？”

啊，果然。所以她才下令?；鸲抢^續(xù)之前的勢(shì)頭。我本該知道的。

“我不效忠任何組織，”我用哥特語(yǔ)回答道，“也沒有稱得上同伙的人。”

“說謊者！”其中一個(gè)修女詛咒般地吐出這個(gè)詞，但她的年長(zhǎng)姐妹舉起一只手示意她停下。

“你族撒謊就如我族呼吸一般，靈族，”她平和地回復(fù)道?！拔覟槭裁匆嘈拍?？”

“我是個(gè)被放逐者，”諷刺的是，我說的都是真話?！拔冶粧仐壴谶@里，而如我所言，我沒有同伙……我從一個(gè)網(wǎng)道大門逃到這里，如果你想去查看那座大門的話，它在約七公里外與這座城市接壤的群山下?！?/p>

已經(jīng)沒有必要再藏著掖著了，而且如果幸運(yùn)的話，我可能剛好給我的方舟世界表親狠狠地來(lái)上了一下，這讓我頗感開心。

修女們對(duì)我的坦白互相交換了不信任的眼神。我的坦誠(chéng)讓她們措手不及，一時(shí)間我不禁懷疑亞歷桑德拉是不是一直是對(duì)的，是不是有可能——

“非常好，瞄準(zhǔn)吧，姐妹們，”指揮官突然下令。

自然不是。

我握緊剃刀連枷，十幾把爆彈槍又一次瞄準(zhǔn)了我。

這就會(huì)是我的葬身之地。如此確定，我也無(wú)從改變，但我可以拉上她們墊背……我也很確定如此?；蛟S不是全部，但也夠多。

至少超過一半。

第一輪齊射會(huì)錯(cuò)失我，我至少可以確定這一點(diǎn)，從那時(shí)起我就能宰掉至少三個(gè)，取決于各自的反應(yīng)速度也許會(huì)是四個(gè)。下一輪射擊可能會(huì)帶走我，但我會(huì)最后一次出手并再殺掉另外兩個(gè)左右。

那就是六到八個(gè)。

當(dāng)我死掉時(shí)，我肯定能把她們中的六到八個(gè)送到她們的尸皇身邊。

“受死吧，”指揮官下令。“屈服于所有膽敢伸手觸碰地球之主的神圣領(lǐng)地的異種之命運(yùn)吧?！?/p>

我忽略了她，掃視著聽她號(hào)令的修女們。

每個(gè)都是年輕女子，大多不比亞歷莎年長(zhǎng)，有著相同的蒼白短發(fā)，膚色也都像她那樣被陽(yáng)光親吻過。她們?nèi)绱讼嘞?，以至于我覺得她們肯定和她來(lái)自同一座指揮部。

她們不僅是與亞歷莎形似，對(duì)她而言也肯定是同志和家人，而且……

我在她們身上看到了她的影子。在她們銳利的目光中，她們年輕的臉龐中，我看到了她。

我的亞歷莎。

我做不到。

我傷害不了她們。

如此想著，亞歷莎咆哮的臉孔便浮現(xiàn)在我的腦海中。她會(huì)找到我的尸體，我可以確定，而與此同時(shí)她也會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)我倒在她摯愛的姐妹們支離破碎的尸體間，我完全能在心底想象出她臉上的表情。

痛苦、背叛、悲痛欲絕的表情。

我不會(huì)用這種方式傷害她，如果我能做到的話也不能以任何方式。對(duì)不起，亞歷莎……

這次我不會(huì)再回來(lái)了。

我輕輕呼出一口氣，舉起了握著剃刀連枷的雙手，再次對(duì)上了指揮官的視線。她目光炯炯，眼中充斥著仇恨，我知道她期望著我移動(dòng)、攻擊和殺戮，就像我的同類中的任何一個(gè)都會(huì)殺死她們一樣。

我不會(huì)讓她稱心如意。

我把武器丟到了地上，雨聲掩蓋住了震耳欲聾的咣當(dāng)聲。

“那我便屈服，”我清楚地說道，低下頭來(lái)。

另一輪寂靜降臨了，充滿了震驚和意外。我沒有抬起頭來(lái)，我僅僅是在等待。我知道，她們毫無(wú)仁慈可言，我也毫不幻想這能讓她們回心轉(zhuǎn)意。

但至少以這種方式，我能在死時(shí)知道亞歷莎還會(huì)想起我的臉，并且不會(huì)感到被背叛的痛苦。

這樣就足夠了。

“一個(gè)知曉她的地位的靈族，”指揮官的聲音只是剛好能讓我聽到?！暗拇_如此，神皇今日為我們降下了奇跡。”

你就是那個(gè)奇跡，伊莎萊。

回憶著小教堂里亞歷莎的甜言蜜語(yǔ)，我不禁輕笑起來(lái)，隨后閉上雙眼想念起她來(lái)。我記得她在我的懷里熟睡時(shí)的觸感，那份溫暖，堅(jiān)實(shí)而引人愛憐的重量，和她像透過青蔥綠葉的陽(yáng)光般的雙眼。我記得她的雙唇，和我們分享著我們的第一個(gè)也是唯一一個(gè)吻時(shí)的暖意，和在練習(xí)拳擊后或是共浴時(shí)她與我十指相扣的感觸。

“原諒我，”我?guī)缀鯚o(wú)聲地說出這句話，然后用靈族語(yǔ)說出了最后一句話，我的遺言。

“我愛你，亞歷莎。”

“處決她?！?/p>

話音剛落，我眼前的世界便陷入了雷鳴電閃。

?

原文：

Unfair.

It’s childish to think that, I know. How childish, to be my age, to have seen such injustice and perpetrated the majority of it, and then to have the thought that life was so infinitely unfair to?me.

Or perhaps not.

A sullen ember of bitterness took up residence in my chest as I opened the throttle of the jetbike a little and began a low-power scan looking for signatures that matched the variations given off by Alessa’s power-armour core. All I could do was drift around the city and search, but perhaps that was a blessing.

After the conversation with Alessa… the argument? Was that an argument we had just had? I suppose in a sense, it was, but nevertheless I know I can’t face her right now. I’m too angry, too bitter, and it’s childish to think it but, honestly…?

What choice was?I?given?

Born in Commorragh.

Raised in Commorragh.

What else could I have been?

I was inducted into the Wych Cults by necessity, not by choice, although I can’t say I was held prisoner there, can I? After all, I willingly pursued the art of killing, rose to prominence, slaughtered my competition, and ascended to the vaunted rank of Succubus via a mound of the dead.

My hair whips around me like a crimson flag in the damp wind of the Hive, and I’m vaguely aware that I ought to be a bit more careful but, honestly, I can’t be bothered. The stealth tech on my jetbike ensures that, so long as I don’t go past basic thrust, I’ll never be detected, even by Asuryani scanners, and I would hear Orks before I saw them, without a doubt.

As for humans? I’m actively scanning for them.

For Alessa’s people, so I can give her back to them.

The thought makes my heart ache.

I wonder if I would have chosen differently, given the option. I’d never had a choice before and, in a way, a lack of choice is my people’s defining facet.

There is not a Druchi or Asuryani that is permitted an honest choice in their lives. We are born a dying people, heirs to a poisoned legacy, and scions of a shattered empire. The Druchii must slake our Thirst or be devoured by a God of the Warp, the Asuryani must spend every waking moment suppressing their own souls or suffer the same.

Spirit Stones keep the Asuryani safe while my Druchi Thirst protects my soul, but both are just cages. One is crystal, the other flesh, and both serve the singular purpose of keeping our souls from being digested, and?that>i/> is the only choice we get to make.

How do we keep ourselves alive?

What atrocities are we willing to conscience to survive?

I slowed the jetbike to a crawl, then to a stop as I paused and sighed, staring down the open urban chasm beneath my feet.

“What am I willing to do to survive?” I asked softly.

I think of Alessandra. I think of her lips, and the taste of her, and the feeling of her in my arms. I think of the way her soul tastes, and of that golden sunlight flavor filling my chest with pure power. I think of her melting beneath me, of her body becoming frail and weak as I take and take and take until she’s little more than a husk driven mad by the need to obey me even as I’m killing her.

“Not that,” I bit my lip hard as I opened the throttle again. “Never?that.”

If that is the fate of us then I would see myself dead and gladly. I refused to poison Alessa anymore than I already have.

I drifted silently through sections of the Hive city, scanning on low as I hugged the walls and floated beneath balconies. I got a ping now and again, but nothing definitive, and nothing that isn’t likely just a sensory ghost, just a refraction of energy that happens to hit the right wavelength for a brief period.

“How many of her kind are even left?” I wonder. “Are?there even humans left here?” I grimace at that thought, partially because it hadn’t occurred to me before.

The Hive city is immense, but so is the Orkish Waaagh. There is every possibility that, in the thirty-plus cycles we had spent idling ourselves away in domestic fantasy, Alessa’s people had lost the war and either retreated or been exterminated or enslaved by the Greenskins.

If that was the case then it was for the best that Alessa had never gone back to them, I suppose. Brave and strong she may be, but she is one warrior and if it truly took only thirty cycles to end the war then one soldier would have made little to no difference.

She would have just died with the rest of them.

“No,” I mutter, taking a risk as I tuned the scanner on the jetbike a little higher to widen the range. “Humans are many things, but they are not so easily broken… I must be looking in the wrong places.”

Although it’s an even greater risk, I open the throttle of the jetbike more and rise above thrust, engaging the main gravity drive. I can taste the weather turning, it tastes of ozone and chemical-tainted rain. A storm is coming, and a big one, and if I don’t find the human forces soon I might not find them at all.

If my instincts were correct then this storm could last weeks, and by that point I would be…

Well, I wouldn’t be fit to conduct any kind of search. I had to find them quickly.

My frustration grew as the hours passed. I got a ping every now and again, but never anything definite. A signal here, a point there, but each time I went to check I found nothing. My head was pounding too, and my whole body was cold… my mind felt sluggish and I cursed myself for a slow-witted wretch as I reached the edge of the perimeter I’d marked out for myself.

Nothing.

Just sensor ghosts and the forgotten dead.

I cursed as I whipped the jetbike around. I had to get back to the spire, and soon. The storm was nearly upon the Hive, and cold droplets were already beginning to fall. In another few hours this wartorn city would be sieged by rainfall.

“Isarae you miserable fool,” I spat as I angled the jetbike back home. “You should have done this cycles ago, not waited til the very last moment.”

Bitter anger welled up in me again as I opened the throttle once more and leaned forward, cutting through the biting wind and icy rain, ducking low to move into the spire strata where mine and Alessa's quarters were located.

The rain comes quickly now and, where once my physiology would have simply burned hotter to compensate, now I start to shiver and shake. I can barely feel the controls of the jetbike in my numb fingers, and my ears are filled with the howling wind as I put on a bit more speed to try and get back to safety quickly.

Little wonder, then, that I did not hear the bark of the bolter before the round struck the stripped down engine casing and blew out the drive manifold.

Physics went haywire around me as the local gravity fields violently convulsed and my jetbike was sent hurtling to and fro as I jerked against the steering column, trying to wrest control before the juddering thrusters could plough me into the wall of a spire.

I barely managed to swing the bike low enough to a thoroughfare that ran between two spires before the high, screaming whine of my bike reached my ears.

Hissing a stream of invectives, I leapt from the saddle, twisting in the wind and rain to bleed out my momentum, but I still struck the ground hard enough to bruise muscle and bone. I watched my bike spiral away several meters before it detonated violently midair as the engine went critical.

The next sound I was conscious of beyond the explosion was booted feet, a familiar, heavy, power-armoured tread approaching from my left and right.

Another curse followed my last and I took off at a dead sprint, my legs burning from the impact as I sought shelter in the narrow alleys.

How had I not detected them? My attention had lapsed, that was the only explanation. My acuity was fading with my vitality, I was cold and shivering… and moreover, these were not graceless Orks; the thunder of the boots behind me was certainly the sound of Imperial discipline at work. The power-armoured weight suggested no ordinary soldiers either.

Nor those genhanced warriors.

Which could mean only one thing on this world… I was being pursued by more of Alessa’s sisterhood.

So I ran.

My breath came in labored heaves and my limbs were leaden, and I could hear them keeping pace with me. If I were still at my peak there would be no contest, but I was too weak, critically so, and they would eventually catch me.

I kept running all the same.

My sense of direction, at least, was still strong, and I knew if I could just get to the spire I could lose them. I knew its halls well after so many cycles spent wandering them, and I was confident I could evade them within the twisting ruin.

I just needed to-

The bark of a bolter split the air and I jerked to the side, survival instinct and reaction driving me as I dove away just as I emerged from an alleyway.

The round detonated against the stonework wall where my chest had been. It had been a well-aimed shot, center mass, and an instant kill had I been struck by it.

More shots chewed up the ground around me as I danced between the explosive rounds. My razorflail flickered out again and again, the segmented blades catching, cutting, and turning aside the sporadic fire until I reached the center of the plaza I had found myself in.

“Cease fire!”

A strong, cultured voice called the order out, and instantly the weapon's fire fell silent. As it did, I realised with a touch of sick irony exactly where I was.

There were dead Orks everywhere, most notably in a small pile that had since rotted down to almost nothing between natural decay and the looting instinct of their own twisted kind. I could even see some of the imagery on the plaza beneath, caked with gore as it was.

I had come back around to the place where it had all begun. The place where I had saved Alessa’s life and, in doing so, irrevocably changed my own.

How very fitting.

“Move and you die, xenos witch,” the voice said, and it was punctuated by the rapid motion of armoured boots.

The dust that had been thrown up in the fusillade was settled now, and as it did I saw them: A dozen sisters forming up before me, about two squads if the memory of my conversations with Alessa were accurate. Each one of them had her bolter trained on a different part of my body, all but guaranteeing a kill shot if I tried anything.

The speaker, a taller, robust woman in ornate power armour, stepped forward from between the women. Her head was bald but for a metal skullcap and a single silver braid, and her face was lined with scars and experience, and her eyes were dichotomous, with one being a sharp, clear blue, while the other was an augmetic with a pinprick of red light at its center.

“Eldar,” she addressed me coldly. “Your existence is an affront to His Divine Majesty, and your presence here, a heresy by definition.”

I did not reply, nor did I move. Instead, I kept my eyes on hers as she met my gaze without fear.

“I shall give you one opportunity to serve,” she continued. “Your kind are piratical sadists and abominations, but you do not operate alone… where is the rest of your poison brood?”

Ah, of course. That was why she had ordered the ceasefire and not continued her momentum. I ought to have known.

“I have no allegiance,” I replied in gothic, “nor allies to speak of.”

“Liar!” One of the sisters spat the word like a curse, but the elder sister held up a staying hand.

“Your kind lie as my kind breathe, Eldar,” she replied in kind. “Why should I believe you?”

“I am an outcaste,” I said in all truth, ironically. “I am abandoned here and, as I said, I have no allegiance… I fled here through a webway portal that is located some seven kilometers under the mountains that border this city if you wish to examine it.”

There was no need to hide it anymore, and if I were quite lucky I might just have given my Craftworld cousins a sharp poke in the eye before my inevitable demise, which amused me.

The sisters shared disbelieving looks at my confession. My frankness had caught them off guard, and for a moment I caught myself wondering if Alessandra might have been right, and if it might be possible to-

“Very well, take aim, sisters,” the commander said sharply.

Naturally, not.

I tightened my grip on my razorflail as a dozen bolters sharpened their aim onto me once more.

This was where I would die. That much was certain and I could not change it, but I?could?take them with me… that much I was also sure of. Perhaps not all of them, but enough.

Better than half, at least.

This first fusillade would miss me, I could ensure that, at least, and from there I could slaughter at least three, maybe four depending on individual reflexes. The next barrage might take me, but I would strike out one last time and slay another pair or so.

Six to eight, then.

In my death, I would be certain of sending six to eight of them to the side of their corpse god.

“Submit to death,” the leader commanded. “Submit to the fate of all xenobreed who dare lay a single twisted limb upon the holy demesne of Him On Earth.”

I ignored her as I looked over the sisters under her command.

Each young woman, most no older than Alessa, had the same pale white hair, cut short and bobbed, and their skin was sun-kissed like hers. They were so similar that I thought they must be part of her commandery.

These were not just similar to Alessa, they were most certainly comrades and family to her as well, and…

…and I saw her in them. In their sharp eyes, and their youthful faces, I saw?her.

My Alessa.

I could not do it.

I could not bring them harm.

The thought of it brought the image of Alessa’s face roaring to the forefront of my mind. She would find my body, of that I am also certain, and when she did she would find me dead amidst the shattered corpses of her beloved sisters, and I could perfectly envision the look on her face in my mind's eye.

The look of pain and betrayal and grief.

It was not in me to harm her in that manner, nor in any manner if I could help it. I am so sorry, Alessa…

I’m not coming back this time.

Letting out a quiet breath, I raised both hands gripping my razorflail and met the commander’s eyes again. They were sharp and hateful, and I knew she expected me to move, to attack, and to kill as any other of my kind would kill them.

I would not give her that satisfaction.

I dropped my weapon to the ground with a deafening clatter, the sound muffled only by the rain.

“I so submit,” I said clearly, and bowed my head.

A new silence descended, one of shock and surprise. I did not raise my head, I merely waited. They did not have mercy in them, I knew that, and I had no illusions that this would change their minds.

But at least this way I could die knowing that Alessa would still be able to recall my face without the pain of betrayal cutting into her.

That would have to be enough.

“An Eldar who knows her place,” the commander said just loudly enough for me to hear clearly. “Truly, the God-Emperor graces us with miracles this day.”

You are the miracle, Isarae.

I chuckled softly as I recalled Alessa’s fond words in the chapel, then closed my eyes and thought of her. I thought of how she felt in my arms as she slept, and of that warm, solid, lovely weight, and of her eyes like the sun shining through maiden forest leaves. I thought of her lips, and the warmth of them when we shared our first and only kiss, and of how her hand filled mine just right when we would sit together after sparring or in the bath.

“Forgive me,” I whispered the words near-silently, and I said the last words, my last words, in Aeldari.

“I love you, Alessa.”

“Execute her.”

The words came out, and on their heels my world turned to thunder.