正文翻譯

Fighting over paying the bill for meals is something some of us are guilty of. If we’re the stereotypical Asian eating with other stereotypical Asians, coming out on tops to pay for a meal is often a big battle, sort of a sport in itself.

為付飯錢而爭吵是我們中的一些人會感到尷尬的事情。但如果我們是典型的亞洲人，和其他典型的亞洲人一起吃飯，那么誰先出來付飯錢往往會是一場大戰(zhàn)，它本身就是一種運(yùn)動。

This is the case with my Chinese family. When I was a kid living in Malaysia, we had countless family gatherings with extended relatives. We’d have dinner at air-conditioned Chinese restaurants where waiters gave us clean plates after each serving. These nights always ended with lots of yelling, relatives arguing at the top of their lungs as to who would pay for the ten-course meals in cash.

這就是我的中國家人的情況。當(dāng)我還是個(gè)孩子住在馬來西亞的時(shí)候，我們舉辦過無數(shù)次的大家庭聚會。我們會在有空調(diào)的中餐館吃飯，服務(wù)員每次上菜后都會給我們干凈的盤子。這些夜晚總是以大喊大叫結(jié)束，親戚們扯著嗓子爭論誰該用現(xiàn)金支付十道菜的費(fèi)用。

In Chinese culture (and other Asian cultures), offering to pay the bill at the end of a meal out is regarded as polite. This goes for family and business-related dining affairs, and no matter the occasion, bill fights are usually amusing.

在中國文化(以及其他亞洲文化)中，外出就餐后主動買單被認(rèn)為是禮貌的表現(xiàn)。這適用于與家庭和商業(yè)有關(guān)的用餐事務(wù)，無論在什么場合，買單大戰(zhàn)通常都很有趣。

Sometimes it’s a pride and face thing that drives the stereotypical Asian to insist on picking up the dining tab. Money is a marker of success along the traditional Chinese train of thought: the more one can afford to spend, the more one can impress. Paying for a meal, the typical Chinese person flaunts their privileged status, coming across as “l(fā)ooking good” and worthy.

有時(shí)，出于自尊和面子的考慮，典型的亞洲人會堅(jiān)持買單。在中國人的傳統(tǒng)思維中，錢是成功的標(biāo)志：一個(gè)人花得起的錢越多，就越能給人留下深刻印象。付錢吃飯時(shí)，典型的中國人會炫耀自己的財(cái)富和地位，給人的印象是“看起來不錯(cuò)”、有深交價(jià)值。

This includes my parents. Whilst in Malaysia, once around Christmas my grandparents organised a banquet with a private room at a Chinese restaurant for twenty or so in the family. Naturally as the organisers, they had no qualms footing the bill. As the last dishes of sweet peanut soup and sesame balls were served, my mum walked out the door with a thick envelope. Everyone assumed she was going to the bathroom. When my grandmother went to get the bill, my parents yelled in Cantonese, “Our treat!”

這也包括我的父母。在馬來西亞的時(shí)候，有一次圣誕節(jié)前后，我的祖父母在一家中餐館的包間組織了一次宴會，大約有20個(gè)家庭成員。作為組織者，他們自然會毫不猶豫地買單。當(dāng)最后一盤甜花生湯和芝麻球上桌時(shí)，媽媽拿著一個(gè)厚厚的信封走出了門。大家都以為她是去洗手間。但當(dāng)奶奶去結(jié)賬時(shí)，我的父母用廣東話喊道:“我們請客!”

Consequently, some of us of Asian heritage might fight for the bill because we fancy one-upmanship but more importantly, gifting. The opportunity to pay the restaurant bill is a means to leverage connections, a means to remember a relationship.

也就是說，我們亞裔中的一些人可能會搶著買單，因?yàn)槲覀兿矚g顯示自己的生活條件更好，但更重要的原因是，我們想向我們想交往的人表達(dá)自己的熱情。買單是一種利用關(guān)系的手段，更是一種加深關(guān)系的手段。

Historically in Chinese culture, gift giving is an act that allows one to show enthusiasm towards maintaining ties. During the Tang Dynasty, scholars who visited emperors offered the latter rare treasures as a sign of friendship. Confucian thought encourages giving with compassion, encourages individuals to seek out opportunities to give as a mark of respect to heaven and earth. There have been times when my parents organised family dinners and when it came time to get the bill, my relatives laughed in their faces, saying it had been paid. A case of I scratch your back, you scratch mine in terms of spontaneously gifting one a meal.

在中國的歷史文化中，送禮是一種表達(dá)對雙方關(guān)系的熱情的行為。唐朝時(shí)，拜訪皇帝的學(xué)者向皇帝贈送稀世珍寶，以示友好。儒家思想鼓勵"惻隱之心，人皆有之"，鼓勵人們尋找機(jī)會向他人贈予財(cái)物，以表達(dá)對天地的尊敬。曾經(jīng)有幾次，我的父母組織家庭聚餐，到了結(jié)賬的時(shí)候，親戚們都笑著說他們已經(jīng)付過了。在主動買單方面，可謂是我?guī)湍悖銕臀摇?/p>

Sometimes the older, baby-boomer Asian generation wrestles to grab the bill because they feel a duty to provide and pay for food, making sure others have enough to eat. In Chinese culture, the hierarchical family structure sees elders and breadwinners receiving the largest degree of reverence, the ones who can afford to support everyone else. Getting the bill then is an act of love and sacrifice; money is often painstakingly earned, and so then is putting food on the table.

有時(shí)，年齡較大的嬰兒潮一代亞洲人會搶著買單，因?yàn)樗麄冇X得有責(zé)任支付賬單，確保其他人有足夠的食物吃。在中國文化中，等級分明的家庭結(jié)構(gòu)使長輩和負(fù)責(zé)養(yǎng)家糊口的人受到了最大程度的尊重，因?yàn)樗麄冇心芰︷B(yǎng)活其他人。因此，買單是一種愛和犧牲的行為；錢往往是辛苦掙來的，吃飯也是如此。

Different people are expected to pick up the dining tab during different occasions. For some birthdays, it’s customary for the birthday person to pay for food, entertainment and cake while the guests bring gifts. When it comes to (heterosexual) dating in Asia, the guy is expected to pay for everything, from the food to fun – which I personally think is nice.

在不同的場合，需要不同的人來買單。在生日宴會上，習(xí)慣上是由過生日的人支付食物、娛樂和蛋糕的費(fèi)用，而客人則會帶著禮物。這里不得不說到在亞洲(異性戀)的約會，從食物到娛樂，男方要支付一切費(fèi)用——我個(gè)人認(rèn)為這很好。

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Losing the bill battle isn’t all embarrassment in front of the typical Asian crowd. Post-fight, there tends to be pats on the backs and a mutual agreement that at least everyone tried. Throughout this camaraderic moment, even the winner swallows their pride. As writer Khalil Gibran said on having good faith:

在典型的亞洲人群面前，輸?shù)糍I單大戰(zhàn)并不會尷尬。爭吵結(jié)束后，雙方往往會拍拍后背，相互表示至少每個(gè)人都盡力了。在這友愛的時(shí)刻，即使是勝利者也會放下他們的自尊。正如作家紀(jì)伯倫在談到誠信時(shí)所說：

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“Generosity is giving more than you can, and pride is taking less than you need.”

“慷慨是給予你所能給予的更多，自尊是接受比你所需要的更少?！?/p>

These days attitudes are changing towards paying the bill among the younger generation Asians, at least in Australia. A survey in 2014 shows 27% of Australians find it acceptable to split the bill when their dining companions have spent more than them. Going Dutch, splitting the bill or paying for the one dish you ordered happens a lot when I eat out with my Asian (and non-Asian) friends here. Perhaps we’re assimilated into Western culture, perhaps we respect each other as equals, or perhaps it’s simply a personal choice based on the expensive life Down Under.

如今，亞洲年輕一代對買單的態(tài)度正在發(fā)生變化，至少在澳大利亞是這樣。2014年的一項(xiàng)調(diào)查顯示，27%的澳大利亞人認(rèn)為，當(dāng)他們的用餐同伴比他們消費(fèi)得多時(shí)，他們可以接受平分賬單。當(dāng)我和我的亞洲(和非亞洲)朋友出去吃飯時(shí)，aa制，分?jǐn)傎~單或只為你自己點(diǎn)的一道菜買單的情況經(jīng)常發(fā)生。也許我們被西方文化同化了，也許我們只是平等地尊重彼此，但也許這只是基于澳大利亞生活成本昂貴的個(gè)人選擇。

Still, the Asian in me fights to pay the bill time and time again. One weekday afternoon last year, in between out of a job and drafting my first book, I met up with vegan blogger Rebecca Rossi from Peace & Love & Veggies for the first time over lunch. Pushing my tray of pasta and cake to the cashier, I took out my wallet. Rebecca smiled warmly and said, “It’s taken care of.” My eyes bulged at her. But, but there was no need for that! I don’t deserve that…. Paying the bill is an act of selflessness, and as Greek philosopher Epictetus said:

盡管如此，我內(nèi)心的亞洲人靈魂還是一次又一次地為我是否應(yīng)該主動買單而掙扎。在去年的一個(gè)工作日的下午，在起草我的第一本書的休息間隙，我第一次在午餐時(shí)遇到了來自和平與愛與蔬菜的素食博主麗貝卡.羅西。我把盛著意大利面和蛋糕的托盤推給收銀員，然后拿出錢包準(zhǔn)備付賬。麗貝卡熱情地笑著說:“我已經(jīng)買完單了。”我瞪大眼睛望著她。但是，但是沒有這個(gè)必要!我們才剛剛認(rèn)識....買單是一種無私的行為，正如希臘哲學(xué)家愛比克泰德所說:

“Wealth consists not in having great possessions, but in having few wants.”

“財(cái)富不在于擁有更多，而在于需求更少?！?/p>

原創(chuàng)翻譯：龍騰網(wǎng) https://www.ltaaa.cn 轉(zhuǎn)載請注明出處

How we feel when someone pays for our meals depends on the occasion. It depends on where we are, who we’re with and how we feel about that person. When someone shouts us a meal, we might feel humbled, loved and thankful if we’re comfortable in their company. On the other hand, we could feel creeped out or suspicious if we didn’t enjoy their presence.

當(dāng)有人為我們買單時(shí)，我們的感受取決于在何種場合。這取決于我們在哪里，和誰在一起，以及我們對那個(gè)人的感覺。當(dāng)有人喊我們吃飯時(shí)，如果我們在他們的陪伴下感到舒適，我們可能會感到謙卑、被愛和感激。而相反，如果我們不喜歡他們的存在，我們可能會感到害怕或疑神疑鬼。

The other day I caught up with another blogger, Lisa from Lisa Dorenfest over dinner. We picked out our meals at a cosy eatery in the city and headed to the cashier. “Let me get it!” I said. You’ve traveled so far to Australia. “No! You don’t have to!” Lisa exclaimed, rummaging through her sling bag. I pulled out a fifty dollar note from my wallet and waved it in the cashier’s face. His eyes lit up. And so did Lisa’s. Maybe I’m turning into my parents with a bit of fight.

前幾天，我在晚餐時(shí)遇到了另一位博主，麗莎.多倫費(fèi)斯特的麗莎。我們在城里一家舒適的餐館里選好了飯菜，然后走向收銀臺?！白屛襾碣I單!”我說，“畢竟你來到了這么遠(yuǎn)的澳大利亞?！啊安?你不必這么做!”麗莎大聲說，并在她的吊帶包里翻找著。我從錢包里掏出一張50澳元的鈔票，在收銀員面前揮舞著。他的眼睛亮了起來，麗莎也一樣。也許我有點(diǎn)像我的父母了。

Sometimes we pay the bill because we can. Because we want to. And sometimes we simply want others to have a treat, a deserved treat.

有時(shí)候我們買單是因?yàn)槲覀冇心芰?，因?yàn)槲覀兿脒@么做。有時(shí)我們只是想讓別人得到一份應(yīng)得的獎賞并好好享受。

Do you fight to pay the bill when eating out?

你在外面吃飯的時(shí)候會搶著付賬嗎?