I have a black dog. His name was depression. He could surprise me with a visit for no reason or occasion.

The black dog made me look and feel older than my years.

When the rest of the world seemed to be enjoying life, I could only see it through the black dog. Activities that usually brought me pleasure suddenly ceased to.

He liked to ruin my appetite. He chewed up my memory and ability to concentrate.

Doing anything or going anywhere with the black dog required super human strength. At social situation he would sniff out what confidence I had and chase it away. My biggest fear was being found out. I worried that people would judge me. Because of the shame and stigma of the black dog. I was constantly worried that I would be found out. So I invested vast amounts of energy into covering him up.

Keeping up an emotional lie is exhausting. Black dog could make me think and say negative things. He could make me irritable and difficult to be around. He would take my love and bury my intimacy.

He loved nothing more than to wake me up with highly repetitive and negative thinking. He also liked to remind me how exhausted I was going to be the next day. Having a black dog in your life isn't so much about feeling a bit down sad or blue...at its worst it's about being devoid of feeling altogether.

I learned that it doesn't matter who you are, the black dog affects millions and millions of people. It is an equal opportunity mongrel. I also learned that there was no silver bullet or magic pill. Medication can help some and others might need a different approach altogether. I also learnt that being emotionally genuine and authentic to those who are close to you can be an absolute game changer.

Most importantly I learnt not to be afraid of the black dog.

The more tired and stressed you are the louder he barks. So it's important to learn how to quiet your mind.

I wouldn't say that I'm grateful for the black dog, but he has been an incredible teacher. He forced me to re-evaluate and simplify my life. I learned that rather than running away from my problems, it's better to embrace them.

The black dog may always be part of my life, but he will never be the beast that he was. We have an understanding.

I 've learned through knowledge patience discipline and humor, the worst black dog can be made to heel.