TED演講者：Lisa Damour / 麗莎?達(dá)摩兒

演講標(biāo)題：3 steps of anxiety overload -- and how you can take back control / 識別過度焦慮的 3 個(gè)步驟——以及你如何能重新控制它

內(nèi)容概要：Anxiety is a normal part of life, so why are we so afraid of it? Psychologist Lisa Damour breaks down how to recognize when anxiety is helpful and when it's harmful, offering simple solutions for calming yourself and taking back control when you feel it slipping away.

焦慮是生活中正常的一部分，那么我們?yōu)槭裁慈绱撕ε滤?？心理學(xué)家麗莎?達(dá)摩兒（Lisa Damour）分析了如何識別焦慮何時(shí)是有益的，何時(shí)是有害的，并提供了簡單的解決方案，讓自己平靜下來，在你感覺到焦慮正在溜走時(shí)奪回控制權(quán)。

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【1】So the most important thing to know about anxiety straight out of the gate, is that it has gotten an unnecessarily bad rap, as has happened for a lot of negative emotions.

所以關(guān)于焦慮,最重要的是要知道, 是它已經(jīng)得到了一個(gè)不必要的壞名聲, 就像很多負(fù)面情緒一樣。

【2】But you should know that psychologists have long understood that anxiety has both healthy forms and unhealthy forms.

但你要知道心理學(xué)家早就明白, 焦慮既有健康的形式, 也有不健康的形式。

【3】And a lot of the anxiety we experience in the day-to-day is healthy.

而我們在日常生活中 經(jīng)歷的很多焦慮都是健康的。

【4】OK, so what makes anxiety healthy?

好吧,那么是什么使焦慮成為健康的呢？

【5】Anxiety is healthy when it is serving as an alarm system that lets us know that something's not right, that it gets our attention and helps us to keep ourselves safe.

當(dāng)焦慮作為一個(gè)警報(bào)系統(tǒng)時(shí) 它就是健康的, 這讓我們知道有些事情不對勁, 它引起了我們的注意 并幫助我們保護(hù)自己的安全。

【6】So if you're driving and somebody swerves and cuts you off and you have a surge of anxiety, that's a good thing.

所以如果你在開車, 有人突然轉(zhuǎn)向并把你截住了 而你有一股焦慮的情緒, 這是件好事。

【7】It will focus your attention, it will help you be safe around that driver, maybe take evasive maneuvers.

它將集中你的注意力, 它將幫助你在那個(gè)司機(jī)身邊保持安全, 也許會(huì)采取回避措施。

【8】But it's good for you to respond.

但你能做出回應(yīng)是件好事。

【9】If you're entirely indifferent or relaxed in that setting, it's not as safe.

如果你在那種環(huán)境中 完全無動(dòng)于衷或放輕松, 那就不安全了。

【10】So we look for anxiety to be of help to us, to guide us and to let us know what we're supposed to be doing and not doing.

所以我們尋找焦慮 來幫助我們,引導(dǎo)我們 并讓我們知道我們應(yīng)該做什么, 不應(yīng)該做什么。

【11】I care for a lot of teenagers clinically, and, you know, I will say to them, if you walk into a party that you thought was going to be a little get-together,

我在臨床上照顧過很多青少年, 而且,你知道嗎,我會(huì)對他們說, 如果你走進(jìn)一個(gè)你認(rèn)為 會(huì)是小聚會(huì)的派對,

【12】and it turns out it's kind of, you know, wild and you feel anxious, pay attention to that reaction.

結(jié)果發(fā)現(xiàn)有點(diǎn),你知道的, 有點(diǎn)狂野,然后你感到焦慮, 注意這種反應(yīng)。

【13】Like, that's telling you something, that's indicating that you may not be as safe as you thought you were going to be.

就好像那是在告訴你一些事情, 這表明你可能不像你想象的那樣安全,

【14】So that's healthy anxiety.

所以這是健康的焦慮。

【15】The only time we consider anxiety to cross the line from healthy to unhealthy is under two conditions, actually.

我們唯一時(shí)間認(rèn)為焦慮跨越了 從健康到不健康的界限 實(shí)際上是在兩種情況下。

【16】One is when we have anxiety, but there's no threat, that there's nothing wrong.

一種是當(dāng)我們有焦慮,但沒有威脅, 沒有什么問題的時(shí)候。

【17】So if it's, you know, a lovely Sunday morning and you're taking a drive and there's no traffic nearby, you shouldn't be having an anxiety response in that moment.

所以,如果是一個(gè)美好的星期天早晨, 你正在開車, 而附近沒有交通, 那一刻你不應(yīng)該有焦慮反應(yīng)。

【18】And if you do, we would consider that grounds for concern.

如果你焦慮了,我們會(huì)認(rèn)為 這是令人擔(dān)憂的理由。

【19】The other time we pay attention to anxiety and consider it to be unhealthy is if the anxiety response is way too big for what's happened, out of proportion to events.

我們注意到了焦慮 并認(rèn)為它是不健康的另一種情況, 就是如果焦慮反應(yīng)對于 所發(fā)生的事情來說太大了, 與事件不成比例的時(shí)候。

【20】So if somebody swerves and cut you off and you have a panic attack in that moment, that is not healthy anxiety, it is not helping you.

所以如果有人轉(zhuǎn)向并截住你, 而在那一刻你有恐慌的發(fā)作, 那不是健康的焦慮,它對你沒有幫助。

【21】And we would address that clinically.

我們會(huì)在臨床上解決這個(gè)問題。

【22】Other than that, we really see anxiety as largely normal, protective, healthy and useful in our lives.

除此之外, 我們真的認(rèn)為焦慮在很大程度上 健康的和對我們生活有用的。

【23】OK, all the same, it feels terrible, right?

好吧,不管怎樣, 感覺很糟糕,對吧？

【24】I mean, I think one of the things that's so true about anxiety is it doesn't feel good even if it's actually serving a useful purpose.

我的意思是,我認(rèn)為關(guān)于焦慮的 一個(gè)很真實(shí)的情況 是它并不感覺良好, 即使它實(shí)際上是為了一個(gè)有用的目的。

【25】And so whether the anxiety is healthy or unhealthy, it's really great to know how to get it in check if you want to.

所以無論焦慮是健康的還是不健康的, 如果你愿意,知道如何 把它控制住,那真是太好了,

【26】And that's what I'm going to teach you now.

這就是我現(xiàn)在要教你的。

【27】And you may be surprised to hear me say, "Oh, let me just teach you how to do this,"

你可能會(huì)覺得驚訝對于聽到我說: “哦,讓我教你怎么做吧?！?/p>

【28】because our experience of anxiety is that it's kind of out of control, that it sort of takes over.

因?yàn)槲覀儗箲]的體驗(yàn)是它有點(diǎn)失控, 它有點(diǎn)接管了一切。

【29】But despite that, the reality is that anxiety is probably the most systematic human emotion.

但盡管如此, 現(xiàn)實(shí)是,焦慮可能是人類最系統(tǒng)的情緒。

【30】It unfolds in a very stepwise fashion, it's actually a one-two-three process when it really goes off the rails.

它以一種非常循序漸進(jìn)的方式展開, 當(dāng)它真的失去控制時(shí), 它實(shí)際上是就是一個(gè)“一二三”的過程。

【31】And so I'm going to walk you through the one-two-three of how anxiety unfolds for all of us.

所以我將帶你們了解焦慮是如何通過這個(gè) “一二三”步驟在我們所有人身上展開。

【32】And then we're going to come back and I'm going to show you how at every step of the way there are things you can do to bring that anxiety back under control.

然后我們會(huì)回來, 我將向你展示如何在每一步 都可以做些什么來讓焦慮重新得到控制。

【33】OK, so the first thing that happens when we have an anxiety response is our bodies react.

好的,所以當(dāng)我們有焦慮反應(yīng)時(shí) 發(fā)生的第一件事 是我們的身體做出反應(yīng)。

【34】There's actually just a physical reaction that we have, and it's pretty universal and it's very familiar to all of us.

實(shí)際上只是我們的一種生理反應(yīng), 它是非常普遍的, 而且對我們所有人來說都非常熟悉。

【35】Your heart rate accelerates, your breathing gets really quick and shallow.

你的心率會(huì)加快, 你的呼吸變得非常快速和淺薄。

【36】It feels uncomfortable, there's other stuff happening in our bodies, too, at the same time.

這感覺很不舒服, 同時(shí),我們的身體里也有其他的事情發(fā)生。

【37】But that activated heart, that kind of hyperventilating sense of breathing, everybody knows that feeling.

但那顆活躍的心, 那種呼吸急促的感覺, 大家都知道這種感覺。

【38】OK, what's happening here?

好吧,這是發(fā)生了什么？

【39】The sympathetic nervous system, which is the part of our nervous system that is paying attention to the environment, is sympathetic to what's around us, is kicking off some degree of the fight or flight response, right?

交感神經(jīng)系統(tǒng), 這是我們神經(jīng)系統(tǒng)中的一部分, 它關(guān)注環(huán)境, 它感知我們周圍的事物, 它啟動(dòng)了某種程度的 戰(zhàn)斗或逃跑反應(yīng),對嗎？

【40】That ancient response that we all know about.

我們都知道的那個(gè)古老的反應(yīng)。

【41】And in the fight or flight response, what we want to do is get ready to run or attack.

在戰(zhàn)斗或逃跑反應(yīng)中, 我們要做的是準(zhǔn)備好奔跑或進(jìn)攻。

【42】And so our sympathetic nervous system is taking measures to send a whole lot of heavily oxygenated blood out to our large muscle groups for that purpose.

因此,我們的交感神經(jīng)系統(tǒng)正在采取措施 將大量的高氧血送到 我們的大肌肉群,以達(dá)到這個(gè)目的。

【43】That's why the heart accelerates, that's why breathing changes.

這就是為什么心臟會(huì)加速, 這就是為什么呼吸會(huì)變化的原因。

【44】And I, you know, especially in caring for people who have not ever heard any of this before, it can be really helpful to understand that as strange as this reaction is,

而我,你知道的,尤其是在照顧那些 以前從未聽過這些的人時(shí), 理解這種反應(yīng)雖然很奇怪, 但確實(shí)很有幫助,

【45】it has a sort of ancient logic to it, may not fit the moment, but it definitely makes sense.

它有一種古老的邏輯, 可能不適合當(dāng)下, 但這絕對有道理。

【46】And it's not something going, you know, kind of, out of whack when our heart and our lungs accelerate.

而且這不算什么事情,你知道的, 當(dāng)我們的心臟和肺部加速時(shí), 就會(huì)出現(xiàn)失調(diào)。

【47】So that's the first thing that happens.

所以這就是發(fā)生的第一件事。

【48】The second thing that happens is we notice that change in our body and we come to the conclusion that we're going to call it anxiety.

第二件發(fā)生的事是 我們會(huì)注意到我們身體的變化, 然后我們得出的結(jié)論是 我們將稱之為焦慮。

【49】We decide to use that label.

我們決定了使用該標(biāo)簽,

【50】This is often an arbitrary decision.

這通常是一個(gè)武斷的決定。

【51】We can call it something else, but we can sometimes default, unhelpfully, to calling it anxiety.

我們可以叫它別的東西, 但我們有時(shí)會(huì)默認(rèn), 無益地稱它為焦慮。

【52】And then the third thing that happens, and this is where things really do go off the rails, is we engage in catastrophic thinking.

然后是發(fā)生的第三件事, 而這正是事情真正失去控制的地方, 是我們進(jìn)行災(zāi)難性的思考。

【53】And the definition of catastrophic thinking is actually very straightforward.

而災(zāi)難性思考的定義其實(shí)是非常直接的。

【54】It's when we overestimate the risks and we underestimate our ability to manage the risks.

就是當(dāng)我們高估了風(fēng)險(xiǎn), 卻低估了自己管理風(fēng)險(xiǎn)的能力。

【55】That's it.

就是這樣。

【56】So if your body reacts, you're like, "I must be anxious, oh, my gosh, this situation is completely out of control and there's nothing I can do to stop it."

所以,如果你的身體有反應(yīng), 你就會(huì)說:“我一定是焦慮了, 哦,我的天啊, 這種情況完全失去了控制, 而我卻無能為力阻止它。”

【57】That's when anxiety really becomes miserable.

那正是焦慮真正變得痛苦的時(shí)候。

【58】And that's the one-two-three.

這就是所謂的“一二三”。

【59】Alright, so knowing that, let's go back and hit every one of these in terms of how we can work against them.

好吧,那么知道了這些, 讓我們回過頭來討論 我們將如何對付它們。

【60】So the first one, the body reacting.

所以,第一個(gè),身體的反應(yīng)。

【61】OK, so one of the most powerful ways to get the body to calm down, is through controlled breathing.

好的,所以讓身體平靜下來的 最有力的方法之一, 就是通過控制呼吸。

【62】And I will tell you, if you're having like, this, "Uh, really, breathing?

我會(huì)告訴你, 如果你反應(yīng)像這樣, “呃,真的嗎,呼吸嗎？

【63】Like, you're going to go to breathing?"

你是在說呼吸嗎？”

【64】I totally get it.

我完全理解。

【65】For years, I was like, "Oh, that's so woo woo.

多年來,我一直認(rèn)為, “哦,那是什么空穴來風(fēng)的想法。

【66】That's not that technical. It's not that scientific."

它不是技術(shù)性的,它不是那么科學(xué)?！?/p>

【67】Ok, I was wrong.

好吧,我錯(cuò)了。

【68】I learned I was wrong.

我知道自己錯(cuò)了。

【69】And in fact, breathing is this really biological intervention.

事實(shí)上,呼吸是真正的生物干預(yù)。

【70】And what it does is it kickstarts the parasympathetic part of our nervous system.

它的作用是啟動(dòng)我們神經(jīng)系統(tǒng)的 副交感神經(jīng)部分。

【71】And the parasympathetic nervous system, its job is to reset the body to its resting state.

而副交感神經(jīng)系統(tǒng), 它的工作是將身體重置為靜止?fàn)顟B(tài)。

【72】OK, here's how this works, it's kind of amazing.

好的,這就是它的工作原理, 這有點(diǎn)不可思議。

【73】So just as the brain can signal to the heart and lungs like, "go into overdrive,"

所以就像大腦可以向 心臟和肺部發(fā)出信號一樣, 比如,“進(jìn)入超速狀態(tài)”,

【74】you know, "we might have to do something here,"

你知道的,“我們可能要在 這里做一些事情?！?/p>

【75】we're also of a mind that the lungs can communicate back to the brain.

我們還認(rèn)為肺部可以與大腦進(jìn)行交流。

【76】So when we're anxious, we're breathing quickly and ... shallowly.

因此,當(dāng)我們焦慮時(shí), 我們的呼吸很快并且……很淺。

【77】And if we override that, if we deliberately deepen and slow our breathing, what we think we're doing, this is sort of the understood science, is that we are hacking into a set of nerves on the surface of our lungs that are stretch receptors.

而如果我們推翻了這一點(diǎn), 如果我們刻意加深和放慢呼吸, 我們認(rèn)為我們正在做的事情, 這是一種被理解的科學(xué), 是我們侵入了肺表面的一組神經(jīng), 這些神經(jīng)是牽張感受器。

【78】And all day, every day, those nerves are paying attention to our breathing to keep us safe.

而一整天,每一天, 這些神經(jīng)都在關(guān)注我們的呼吸, 以確保我們的安全。

【79】And they notice that we have slowed our breathing and things have gotten calmer and they read that as evidence of safety because we only breathe deeply and slowly when we're safe.

他們注意到我們已經(jīng)放慢了呼吸, 事情變得平靜了, 他們將此視為安全的證據(jù), 因?yàn)槲覀冎挥性诎踩珪r(shí) 才會(huì)深呼吸和緩慢呼吸。

【80】And they send that message up to the brain saying, "you're kind of having a reaction that doesn't make sense because the nerves on the lungs are telling us that we must be safe."

然后他們把這個(gè)信息發(fā)送到大腦,說: “你的反應(yīng)有點(diǎn)不合理, 因?yàn)榉尾康纳窠?jīng)告訴我們, 我們一定是安全的。”

【81】And that's how anxiety comes under control.

這就是焦慮得到控制的方式。

【82】That's step one.

那就是第一步。

【83】Step two, if we want to, need to, is to consider whether anxiety is the right name for what's happening.

第二步,如果我們想要,需要的話, 就是考慮正在發(fā)生的事情 是否真的是焦慮。

【84】That we have a kind of activated response all the time.

就像我們一直都有一種激活的反應(yīng)。

【85】So it might be like, I was excited for this presentation.

所以它可能是這樣的: 我對這次演講感到很興奮。

【86】And before this presentation, I kind of felt a little bit of a rev.

在這次演講之前,我感覺有點(diǎn)激動(dòng)。

【87】I could have said, "I must be anxious."

我本來可以說:“我一定很焦慮。”

【88】But instead I said, "No, I think I'm really excited."

但相反,我說: “不,我覺得我真的很興奮?！?/p>

【89】And that shift in thinking actually makes a huge difference in terms of how we feel about what we're engaging.

這種思維上的轉(zhuǎn)變實(shí)際上使我們 對所參與的事情的感受 產(chǎn)生了巨大的影響。

【90】The third thing we want to watch out for is anxiety going off the rails with catastrophic thinking.

我們要注意的第三件事 是焦慮會(huì)失去控制帶著災(zāi)難性的思考。

【91】And again, that's overestimating risk, underestimating our ability to handle it.

再一次,這是高估了風(fēng)險(xiǎn), 低估了我們應(yīng)對風(fēng)險(xiǎn)的能力。

【92】So if something is feeling really, really scary to you, really, really anxiety-provoking, key questions to ask yourself are, "Am I imagining this to be worse than it might really be?"

所以如果某件事讓你感覺 真的、真的很可怕, 真的,真的很讓人焦慮, 需要問自己的關(guān)鍵問題是: “我是不是把這一切想象得 比實(shí)際情況更糟糕了？”

【93】So you're going to try to bring that estimation of risk down.

所以你要嘗試把這個(gè)風(fēng)險(xiǎn)估計(jì)降低。

【94】And also, "Do I have more say in how this is going to go than I'm giving myself credit for?"

還有就是,“我對這件事的發(fā)展 是否比我給自己的評價(jià)更有發(fā)言權(quán)？”

【95】'"Are there things I can do to actually increase my sense of control, not feel as helpless as I do right now?"

“我是否可以做一些事情 來實(shí)際增強(qiáng)我的控制感, 而不是像現(xiàn)在這樣感到無助？”

【96】So you're not trying to get rid of the anxiety entirely, but you're trying to sort of get it in the narrower band of not overestimating risk and not underestimating your own powers.

所以你并不是要完全擺脫焦慮, 而是要讓它處于更窄的范圍內(nèi), 即不要高估風(fēng)險(xiǎn), 也不要低估自己的能力。

【97】So I'm going to start to wrap up, but here is the bottom line.

所以我要開始總結(jié)了, 但這里是關(guān)鍵之處。

【98】Most of the time, we don't need to feel anxious about feeling anxious.

大多數(shù)時(shí)候, 我們不需要為感到焦慮而焦慮,

【99】It really is there to help us out.

它真的是為了幫助我們。

【100】And whether we want it there or not, or whether it's helping us or not, if we want to get it under control, knowing the basics of how it unfolds really does put you in the driver's seat of knowing how to calm yourself when you feel anxious.

不管我們是否想要它, 或者它是否對我們有幫助, 如果我們想控制住它, 了解它是如何展開的基本知識 會(huì)在你感到焦慮時(shí)讓你掌握 如何讓自己平靜下來的主動(dòng)權(quán)。

【101】And so you don't have to feel like it's something that you are at the mercy of.

所以你不必覺得這是一件 你任人擺布的事情。

【102】David Biello: You spoke about breathing and how you were skeptical in the early days.

大衛(wèi).比羅（David Biello）: 你談到了呼吸 以及你在早期是如何持懷疑態(tài)度的。

【103】Do you have the particular breathing practice you like?

你是否有自己喜歡的特定呼吸練習(xí)？

【104】Lisa Damour: I do.

麗莎?達(dá)摩兒（Lisa Damour）:我有。

【105】Once I got over my snobbery about breathing, I use something called square breathing or box breathing.

一旦我克服了對呼吸的勢利心態(tài), 我使用一種叫做方形呼吸 或箱式呼吸的方法。

【106】And, you know, people have often heard of this.

而且,你知道嗎, 人們經(jīng)常聽說過這個(gè)。

【107】And it's really simple.

這真的很簡單。

【108】It's where you breathe in on a count of three, so one, two, three, in - and I'm actually going to walk us through it as a group.

就是你在數(shù)到三的時(shí)候吸氣, 所以一、二、三,吸氣 然后實(shí)際上我將引導(dǎo)我們 作為一個(gè)小組完成它。

【109】Then you hold it for a count of three: one, two, three.

然后你保持吸氣數(shù)三下: 一、二、三。

【110】Then you exhale slowly on a count of three: one, two, three.

然后你慢慢地呼氣,數(shù)三下: 一、二、三。

【111】And then you wait, one, two, three.

然后你就等著,一、二、三。

【112】So, one, two, three, in.

所以,一、二、三,吸氣。

【113】One, two, three, hold.

一、二、三,保持。

【114】One, two, three, exhale.

一、二、三,呼氣。

【115】One, two, three, wait.

一、二、三,等等。

【116】OK, so let's all do it together.

好的,那么讓我們一起做吧。

【117】But here is my instruction to you.

但是,我在這里要給你指示。

【118】If you really want this to work, picture the nerves on the surface of your lungs getting the message.

如果你真的想讓它發(fā)揮作用, 想象一下,你的肺部 表面的神經(jīng)收到了信息。

【119】You're not just breathing to breathe, right?

你不僅僅是為了呼吸而呼吸,對嗎？

【120】You're breathing because you are hacking into this system and using those nerves to communicate to your brain that everything's OK, right?

你在呼吸是因?yàn)槟阏谇秩脒@個(gè)系統(tǒng), 并利用這些神經(jīng)向你的大腦 傳達(dá)一切正常,對吧？

【121】So everybody, like, (Exhales) blow out breath a little bit, ready?

所以每個(gè)人,像這樣,（呼氣） 稍微呼一口氣,準(zhǔn)備好了嗎？

【122】Breathe in slowly.

慢慢吸氣。

【123】One, two, three.

一、二、三。

【124】Hold it.

保持住。

【125】One, two, three.

一、二、三。

【126】Exhale slowly, one, two, three.

慢慢地呼氣,一、二、三。

【127】Now, pause.

現(xiàn)在,暫停一下。

【128】One, two, three.

一、二、三。

【129】That's it. (Laughs) And you can do it a few times.

就是這樣。（笑） 你可以多做幾次。

【130】If you get really anxious a lot, you should be practicing this when you're not anxious so that you can slip right into that groove.

如果你真的經(jīng)常感到焦慮, 你應(yīng)該在不焦慮的時(shí)候練習(xí)這個(gè), 這樣你就可以直接進(jìn)入那個(gè)狀態(tài)。

【131】But it is powerful.

但它是強(qiáng)大的。

【132】It is really powerful.

它真的很強(qiáng)大。

【133】And I am a little embarrassed about how long it took me to get on the breathing train.

我對自己花了這么長時(shí)間才開始 進(jìn)行呼吸訓(xùn)練感到有些尷尬。

【134】DB: I mean, it's actually incredible because just doing that with you, you know, the little ball of whatever, excitement in my stomach just sort of dissipates.

DB:我的意思是,這真的很不可思議, 因?yàn)橹皇呛湍阋黄鹱隽艘幌? 你知道嗎,那個(gè)小球什么的, 我胃里的興奮感就這樣消散了。

【135】So breathing, people, it's real.

所以,呼吸吧,大家,這是真實(shí)的。

【136】It's important.

這很重要。

【137】So we already have some questions flooding in.

所以我們已經(jīng)有一些問題涌入了,

【138】And I want to make this useful for the members.

我想讓這對會(huì)員們來說很有用。

【139】Let's get right to them.

讓我們開始吧。

【140】First up, Gordon wants to know about helping other people.

首先,戈登想了解如何幫助他人。

【141】How can we help if we notice that a friend or a family member is experiencing excessive anxiety?

我們該如何提供幫助如果我們發(fā)現(xiàn) 一個(gè)朋友或家庭成員 正在經(jīng)歷過度的焦慮？

【142】LD: OK, I love this question.

LD:好的,我喜歡這個(gè)問題。

【143】So the first thing I would say just by being generally useful, is, we'll get to the excessive piece, but just, people need validation that anxiety makes sense most of the time.

所以我想說的第一件事就是普遍有效的, 是,我們會(huì)進(jìn)入過度的階段, 但只是說,人們需要確認(rèn) 焦慮在大多數(shù)時(shí)候是有意義的。

【144】And one of the real hazards of anxiety being talked about as though it's everywhere and always pathological is that people experience normal anxiety and then they think, "Oh, I'm having anxiety.

焦慮的真正危害之一是, 它被談?wù)摰煤孟袼鼰o處不在, 而且總是病態(tài)的, 那就是人們會(huì)經(jīng)歷正常的焦慮, 然后他們會(huì)想,“哦,我在焦慮。

【145】Oh, no, there's something really wrong."

哦,不,真的有什么不對勁。”

【146】And so one quick thing you can do to say [to] somebody who's anxious if they're like, "Oh my gosh, I have a big talk tomorrow and I'm anxious,"

因此,你可以快速的 [對] 焦慮的人說, 如果他們說,“哦,我的天哪, 我明天有一個(gè)重要的演講,我很焦慮。”

【147】you can say, "You're having the right reaction ...

你可以說,“你的反應(yīng)是對的……

【148】That's going to give you energy and juice.

這會(huì)給你能量和能力。

【149】There's nothing wrong with being anxious about a talk"

對演講感到焦慮并沒有什么錯(cuò)”,

【150】or "there's nothing wrong with having to go tell your boss something they don't want to hear.

或者 “不得不去告訴你的老板 一些他們不想聽的事情”,這沒有什么不對。

【151】And that making you anxious, that's evidence that you work perfectly."

而這讓你感到焦慮, 這證明你工作得很棒。

【152】So that alone reassures people a lot.

因此,光是這一點(diǎn)就能讓人們放心很多。

【153】And then I think the next step you can do is to say, "If it gets uneasy, if it gets to be too much more anxiety than is helpful to you, right?" -

然后我認(rèn)為下一步你可以說, “如果它變得不安, 如果它變得過于焦慮 而對你沒有幫助,對嗎？”

【154】Even framing it is like, "This should help you out until it doesn't." - "You can actually dial it back."

甚至把它框起來就像,“這應(yīng)該能幫助你, 直到它無法為止。” “你實(shí)際上可以把它調(diào)回來?！?/p>

【155】So walk them through why breathing works.

因此,要讓他們了解 為什么呼吸會(huì)起作用。

【156】Everybody knows they're supposed to breathe.

每個(gè)人都知道他們應(yīng)該呼吸。

【157】Very few people know why.

很少有人知道為什么,

【158】And so that's why people won't do it.

這就是為什么人們不會(huì)這樣做的原因。

【159】And so when I'm caring for people, I will say, think about your anxiety being on a dial, right?

所以當(dāng)我關(guān)心別人時(shí),我會(huì)說, 想想你的焦慮是在一個(gè)表盤上,對吧？

【160】And if it's a zero to 10 dial, two to three, you actually tend to do a better job with whatever you're needing to do if you have a little energy, a little rev.

如果它是一個(gè)零到十的表盤, 二到三,無論你需要做什么, 你實(shí)際上往往會(huì)做得更好, 如果你有一點(diǎn)能量,一點(diǎn)點(diǎn)轉(zhuǎn)速。

【161】Once it gets into four, five, six, seven, you start to be in trouble.

一旦進(jìn)入四、五、六、七, 你開始有麻煩了。

【162】And so I teach people to use the breathing to actually turn down the dial.

因此,我教人們用呼吸來實(shí)際調(diào)低表盤。

【163】But that idea of like, you're not at the mercy of this.

但這種想法就像, 你不是在任由它擺布。

【164】You can be in the driver's seat on this and you can use breathing or reframing or questioning your own thinking, is really helpful because there is a general sense of like, we're helpless in the face of anxiety, and we're really not.

你可以在這個(gè)問題上占據(jù)主導(dǎo)地位, 你可以使用呼吸或重構(gòu), 或質(zhì)疑你自己的想法, 這真的很有幫助, 因?yàn)橛幸环N普遍的感覺是, 我們在焦慮面前很無助, 而我們其實(shí)沒有。

【165】DB: So Catarina describes an anxiety that leads them to avoid things.

DB:所以卡塔琳娜描述了一種 導(dǎo)致他們逃避事物的焦慮。

【166】So meeting new people because it's scary.

所以結(jié)識新朋友因?yàn)檫@很可怕。

【167】Do you - What do you recommend for that kind of avoidance tactic around anxiety?

你是否 對于這種圍繞焦慮的回避機(jī)制, 你有什么建議？

【168】LD: Oh, Catarina, I'm so glad you brought up avoidance.

LD:哦,卡塔琳娜, 我很高興你提到了逃避問題。

【169】This is actually the most important thing we need to say when it gets to talking about anxiety.

這實(shí)際上是我們在談?wù)摻箲]時(shí), 需要說的最重要的事情。

【170】So, when we're frightened of something, our instincts are like, "Get away."

所以,當(dāng)我們對某些東西感到恐懼時(shí), 我們的本能是這樣的, “走開“。

【171】And if that is a tiger or a bad driver, those are really good instincts.

而如果那是一只老虎或一個(gè)差勁的司機(jī), 這些都是非常好的本能。

【172】And so when we remain frightened of something that's in our everyday lives, we can actually feel very compelled to avoid it.

因此,當(dāng)我們對日常生活中的 一些東西保持恐懼時(shí), 我們實(shí)際上會(huì)感到非常被迫地去避免它。

【173】Here is, if you remember anything from what we talk about today, these are the three words I want you to remember most.

在這里,如果你還記得 我們今天談?wù)摰膬?nèi)容, 這是我最希望你記住的三個(gè)詞。

【174】Avoidance feeds anxiety.

逃避會(huì)助長焦慮。

【175】So here's the process.

所以過程是這樣的。

【176】It's actually a wonderfully -- I think it's fascinating science on this.

這實(shí)際上是一個(gè)奇妙的 我認(rèn)為這是有趣的科學(xué)。

【177】So say, Catarina, you're thinking about going to a party.

所以比如說,卡塔琳娜, 你正在考慮去參加一個(gè)派對。

【178】You've been invited to a party and you're like, OK, "I'm going to try to go to this party."

你被邀請參加一個(gè)派對, 你就想說,好吧, “我會(huì)試著去參加這個(gè)派對?！?/p>

【179】And then it's time to go to the party and you feel your anxiety starting to bubble up and you're like, "Forget it. I'm going to cancel."

然后到了去參加派對的時(shí)候, 你覺得焦慮的感覺開始冒出來了, 你就想說,“算了吧。 我還是不去了?！?/p>

【180】OK, here's what's going to happen.

好的,下面是將要發(fā)生的事情。

【181】You'll go from feeling very, very anxious to suddenly feeling much, much better.

你會(huì)從感到非常、非常的焦慮 到突然感覺好多了、好太多了。

【182】So this is the first helping of how avoidance feeds anxiety, which is that it feels good.

因此,這是逃避所帶來的 如何助長焦慮的第一個(gè)幫助, 那就是,感覺很好。

【183】That, we call it a reinforcing experience.

這一點(diǎn),我們稱之為強(qiáng)化的經(jīng)驗(yàn)。

【184】You felt bad, you avoided, you feel better.

你感覺不好,你避開了, 你感覺好多了。

【185】So you're like, avoidance is kind of fun.

所以你就會(huì)覺得逃避蠻有趣的。

【186】Or not fun, but it solves the problem.

或者并不有趣,但它能解決問題。

【187】Here comes the second helping.

但第二種情況是,

【188】Because you haven't gone to the party, nothing challenges your beliefs about how frightening that party is.

因?yàn)槟銢]有去參加派對, 所以沒有什么可以挑戰(zhàn) 你對于派對有多可怕的假想。

【189】The party remains whatever you have pictured in your mind - people not talking to you, you know, people, you know, whatever.

派對仍然是你腦海中所想象的那樣 人們不跟你說話,你知道的, 人們嘛,你懂的,隨便怎樣。

【190】Like whatever you have imagined about what makes that party scary goes unchallenged.

就像你想象的那樣,關(guān)于那個(gè)派對的 可怕之處,這假想沒有受到挑戰(zhàn)。

【191】If you actually go to the party, you often find it's a little bit, if not a lot, better than you expected.

如果你真的去參加派對, 你往往會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)它比你預(yù)期的 要好一點(diǎn),甚至很多。

【192】But if you don't go, it remains very frightening.

但是如果你不去, 它仍然是非?？膳碌摹?/p>

【193】So that is how avoidance actually entrenches anxiety over time.

因此,這就是逃避實(shí)際上是如何 隨著時(shí)間的推移鞏固焦慮的。

【194】It feels good to do it and it actually doesn't give us any competing data.

這樣做的感覺很好,而且實(shí)際上并沒有 給我們提供任何有說服性的數(shù)據(jù)。

【195】So when you go see a clinician for treatment of anxiety, often we will start by asking about what are you avoiding as a result of your anxiety?

所以當(dāng)你去看臨床醫(yī)生治療焦慮時(shí), 通常我們會(huì)先問一下, 你因?yàn)榻箲]而逃避了什么？

【196】And we will work with you on -- we call it graduated exposure, which is like basically baby steps - getting you in there, right?

我們將會(huì)幫助你 我們稱之為漸進(jìn)式暴露, 這基本上就像嬰兒學(xué)步一樣 讓你進(jìn)入狀況,對吧？

【197】So we'll say, OK, could you go to a small thing with a couple people?

所以我們會(huì)說,好的, 你能和幾個(gè)人一起去做一件小事嗎？

【198】Could you use your breathing to make that bearable?

你能用你的呼吸來使 這一切變得可以忍受嗎？

【199】And it would just sort of work you into it very, very slowly, because the solution to anxiety is often what we call exposure, making yourself do it.

然后它會(huì)非常、非常緩慢地 讓你融入其中, 因?yàn)榻鉀Q焦慮的方法 往往就是我們所說的暴露, 讓自己去做。

【200】But you are not alone in this sense of like, you know, why not just not go?

但在以下這種意義上 你并不是一個(gè)人,就像是,你知道的, 可以不去做嗎？

【201】It feels better to not go.

不去做的感覺更好。

【202】And that's something that we, as clinicians, work really hard on.

而這是我們作為臨床醫(yī)生 非常努力的事情。

【203】And I will tell you, you know, the pandemic and kids and school, you know that, and, you know, we've always known if this child is frightened of school, the solution is get them to school.

我會(huì)告訴你,你知道的, 流行病、孩子和學(xué)校, 你知道的,而且,你懂的, 我們一直都知道如果這個(gè)孩子害怕上學(xué), 解決辦法就是讓他們上學(xué)。

【204】Even if they sit in the teacher's ... back office for the day.

即使他們當(dāng)天就坐在老師的…… 后面的辦公室里。

【205】Physically being at school is better than being home if it's otherwise safe for them to be there.

如果他們在學(xué)校是安全的, 那么實(shí)際的待在學(xué)校比在家好。

【206】DB: So another ...

DB:所以另一個(gè)……

【207】Area of anxiety that's popping up in the chat is dealing with it in our sort of, children.

聊天框中出現(xiàn)的焦慮領(lǐng)域 是處理這種像是我們孩子們的焦慮。

【208】Robert wants to know what, or are there any differences between words like anxiety and worry or fear as it might pertain to how a teenager is describing or trying to put a name to what they're feeling?

羅伯特想知道, 焦慮和擔(dān)心或恐懼這樣的詞之間 是什么樣的區(qū)別,或者說有什么區(qū)別？ 因?yàn)樗赡苌婕暗揭粋€(gè)青少年如何描述, 或試圖給他們的感受命名？

【209】LD: I think it means for the kid whatever it means.

LD:我認(rèn)為這對孩子來說 意味著什么都可以。

【210】But I will say teenagers use the term anxiety a lot, and they use it very broadly.

但我要說的是,青少年經(jīng)常 使用焦慮這個(gè)詞, 并且他們使用的范圍非常廣。

【211】And I've been practicing for a very long time.

而我已經(jīng)練習(xí)了很長時(shí)間。

【212】And then in the last I'd say 10 years, I started to notice, like, kids use this term a lot and I wasn't quite sure what to make of it.

然后在過去的 10 年里,我開始注意到, 就好像孩子們經(jīng)常使用這個(gè)詞, 但我不太確定該如何理解它。

【213】And then I was actually rereading "Jane Eyre" - no, it was "Pride and Prejudice."

然后我實(shí)際上是在重讀《簡.愛》 不,是《傲慢與偏見》。

【214】And Mrs. Bennet, I don't know if you remember her, she's like, the kind of piece of work mom in that book.

還有班納特夫人, 我不知道你是否記得她, 她就像那本書里的那種在職媽媽。

【215】There is a line in the book that was, "Whenever Mrs. Bennet was discontented, she fancied herself to be nervous."

書中有一句話是這樣的, “每當(dāng)班納特夫人不滿的時(shí)候, 她就主張說自己是緊張。”

【216】And I thought, Oh, I think that's often what I'm seeing with teenagers, is they'll say, "I feel anxious" when they usually mean not calm.

我就想到說,哦,我想這往往就是 我在青少年身上看到的情況, 他們會(huì)說,“我感到焦慮” 而他們通常是指不平靜。

【217】'"I don't feel calm."

“我感到不平靜。”

【218】And so the first thing I would do if a teenager says "I feel anxious" is to say, "Tell me what's going on."

因此,如果青少年說:“我感到焦慮”, 我會(huì)做的第一件事就是說: “告訴我發(fā)生了什么事。”

【219】And they might say, you know, "I've got a big try out tomorrow"

他們可能會(huì)說,你知道的, “我明天有一個(gè)重要的試演”,

【220】or, you know, "This concert is happening that I'm going to with my friends."

或者,“這場音樂會(huì)正在舉行, 我要和我的朋友們一起去?！?/p>

【221】And listen for the possibility that it's something besides anxiety.

并傾聽它是否有可能是焦慮之外的東西。

【222】It could be they're excited, they're amped, they're apprehensive.

有可能是他們很興奮, 他們很激動(dòng),他們很忐忑。

【223】So try to make more granular their description of what is causing the stirred-up feeling.

因此,要盡量使他們的描述更加細(xì)化, 也就是他們對造成這種 激動(dòng)的感覺的描述,

【224】And sometimes they are anxious.

有時(shí)他們也會(huì)感到焦慮。

【225】And that's when there's a threat, right?

而那是在有威脅的時(shí)候,對嗎？

【226】Like, "I'm feeling anxious because I have my driver's test tomorrow and I am not ready."

比如說,“我感到焦慮, 因?yàn)槲颐魈煲獏⒓?駕駛考試,但我還沒準(zhǔn)備好?！?/p>

【227】That is anxiety.

那就是焦慮。

【228】There is a threat, they could fail that driver's test, right?

有一種威脅是他們可能無法通過 那個(gè)駕駛考試,對嗎？

【229】So listen for a threat and then ...

所以要傾聽威脅,然后呢……

【230】if they're anxious about something, be like, "Yeah, of course you're anxious.

如果他們對某些事情感到焦慮, 就說:“是的,你當(dāng)然會(huì)焦慮。

【231】That's kind of scary.

這有點(diǎn)可怕。

【232】Let's see what we can do to reduce your sense of risk, increase your sense of control."

讓我們看看我們能 做些什么來減少你的風(fēng)險(xiǎn)感, 增加你的控制感?！?/p>

【233】But often it's very important that we help them bring more nuance to the language they use around a sort of sense of being stirred up.

但往往非常重要的是,我們幫助他們 把更多的細(xì)微差別 帶到他們所使用的語言中, 圍繞著一種被激起的感覺。

【234】And what's so nice is that act of a teenager saying or a kid saying, "I feel really anxious about school tomorrow." - "What's making you anxious?" - "New classroom, new kids, don't know where things are going to be."

而非常好的現(xiàn)象是 當(dāng)一個(gè)青少年或孩子說: “明天要上學(xué)我真的很焦慮?！?“是什么讓你感到焦慮？” “新的教室,新的同學(xué)們, 不知道事情會(huì)發(fā)展成怎樣。”

【235】You say, "Yeah, you should feel apprehensive, there's a lot there, and also maybe a little excited."

你就說,“是的,你應(yīng)該感到忐忑不安, 那里有很多東西, 也許還有一點(diǎn)興奮?！?/p>

【236】If you can get in there with words that are more accurate than the big generic of anxiety, that act is in and of itself therapeutic.

如果你能用比泛泛的焦慮 更準(zhǔn)確的詞語融入其中, 那么這種行為本身就是治療性的。

【237】Kids are like, "Yes, I am apprehensive and also excited."

孩子們會(huì)說: “是的,我很忐忑,也很興奮。”

【238】That they feel heard, they feel better, and they have a better language.

他們感覺有被傾聽,他們感覺更好, 并且他們有更好的語言。

【239】So what I watch for especially, is kids saying, "I have anxiety."

所以我特別關(guān)注的是, 孩子們說:“我有焦慮癥?！?/p>

【240】I like to say, "You're feeling anxious."

我喜歡說,“你是感到焦慮。”

【241】Because I think, there is this sense of, "I have anxiety,"

因?yàn)槲艺J(rèn)為存在著一種 “我有焦慮”的氛圍,

【242】I think there's very much among adolescents a sense of like, "I have anxiety,"

我認(rèn)為青少年中有很多像這樣的氛圍, 就是“我有焦慮?！?/p>

【243】but I try not to say, well, everybody has anxiety at some level because I don't want to be dismissive, but to really help them make that distinction between a feeling that comes and goes, and a diagnosis they would need to be concerned about.

但我盡量不說,好吧, 每個(gè)人在某種程度上都有焦慮, 因?yàn)槲也幌胼p視他們, 而是要真正幫助他們 區(qū)分“來來去去”的感覺, 以及他們需要關(guān)注的診斷。

【244】DB: Several folks want to know how can they tell when to seek help, when anxiety has become too crippling?

DB:有幾位朋友想知道, 他們?nèi)绾闻袛嗪螘r(shí)尋求幫助, 當(dāng)焦慮已經(jīng)變得非常嚴(yán)重時(shí)？

【245】LD: This is a great place to wrap up. This is a perfect place to wrap up.

LD:這是一個(gè)很棒的總結(jié)點(diǎn), 這是一個(gè)完美的總結(jié)點(diǎn)。

【246】So mostly this has been an ad for anxiety.

所以這主要是一個(gè)焦慮的廣告。

【247】Like, don't be frightened of it.

就是說,不要害怕它,

【248】Be curious about it.

要對它感到好奇。

【249】Trust that it's trying to tell you something.

相信它試圖告訴你一些事情。

【250】If it feels too uncomfortable, try these strategies to get it under control.

如果感覺太不舒服, 請嘗試這些策略來控制它。

【251】But two conditions.

但有兩個(gè)條件。

【252】Let's go back to them.

讓我們回到它們身上。

【253】If you feel like your anxiety is showing up and there's no reason, like, there's no threat, there's nothing to be worried about, that would be a great time to seek out support.

如果你覺得你的焦慮出現(xiàn)了, 而且沒有任何理由, 比如說,沒有威脅, 沒有什么可擔(dān)心的, 那將是一個(gè)尋求幫助的好時(shí)機(jī)。

【254】The other is if your anxiety like, well, there's a threat, but like my anxiety is off the charts and making me miserable or getting in the way of my life, that's a good time to seek support.

另一個(gè)是如果你的焦慮是比如說, 好吧,有威脅的, 但就像我的焦慮超出了圖表, 讓我很痛苦 或妨礙了我的生活, 那將是尋求幫助的好時(shí)機(jī)。

【255】So, you know, pretty straightforward in terms of how we define what we consider concerning.

所以,你知道的, 關(guān)于我們?nèi)绾味x我們考慮的問題 而言,是非常直接的。

【256】But I really want you to know, most anxiety does not need to make you feel anxious about its own presence.

但我真的想讓你知道, 大多數(shù)的焦慮并不是需要讓你 對它本身的存在感到焦慮的。